AITA for telling my husband I am pregant during his brother’s bachelor weekend?

A woman excitedly shared the news of a positive pregnancy test with her husband while he was away celebrating his brother’s bachelor weekend. The couple had been actively trying for their second child, even though he had previously expressed reluctance about a baby arriving late in the year. Instead of the warm acknowledgment she hoped for, he first ignored her message, then coldly replied that he didn’t want to discuss it until he returned home.

The lack of any positive response left her hurt and questioning her timing. In follow-up exchanges, he doubled down, claiming he had already suspected she was pregnant for a week based on a comment about chicken smelling odd—yet never mentioned it before leaving. This chilly reaction sparked debate about expectations, timing, and underlying tensions in their relationship.

‘AITA for telling my husband I am pregant during his brother’s bachelor weekend?’

The couple had been trying for a second baby despite his concerns about the due date.

Hubby and I have been trying for baby #2. For various reasons he doesn't want a baby to be born at the end of the year. However, we still kept...

She received a positive test early in the pregnancy and immediately shared the joyful news.

I got a BFP today. It is still super early, 3w1d. I sent him a photo of the positive test. After seeing the message, first he ignored me. Then an...

I was hoping for something along the lines of, "Wow! How are you feeling?" I don't expect him to cut his weekend short and come back home or anything, but...

His response grew colder, prompting her to push for an explanation and revealing more odd behavior.

When I asked why he doesn't want to talk about it, he said I should've waited until he was back home to tell him. I told him that all I...

He has ignored me again since then. So, AITA for telling my husband I am pregnant while he is away for his brother's bachelors and hoping he would show a...

ETA: he has asked why he would want to know I am pregnant? And then said he has known I am pregnant for a week, because I said some chicken...

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At its heart, the issue is about mismatched expectations around sharing major life news. When partners are actively trying to conceive, most people anticipate joy—even if tempered by practical concerns like timing—rather than dismissal or delay. His refusal to offer any positive acknowledgment, combined with the bizarre claim of already “knowing” without ever voicing it, suggests deeper discomfort, possibly tied to his stated aversion to a late-year birth or unresolved feelings about expanding the family.

Opposing views might argue that big announcements deserve an in-person moment, especially during a family event focused on celebration, and that texting could feel like an intrusion. However, pregnancy tests often prompt immediate sharing between committed partners, and a simple supportive reply costs nothing.

What makes this more complicated is his retroactive claim of suspicion; if true, it raises questions about why he stayed silent and why he now uses it to justify disengagement. The broader takeaway points to potential communication breakdowns or mismatched commitment levels that deserve honest discussion before the pregnancy progresses.

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Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Many users labeled his behavior a major red flag, emphasizing that he should have shown at least basic excitement or concern for her well-being.

pudge-thefish − NTA what a weird reaction on his part!

Agirlnamedsue2 − NTA. I don't get it. I'm not even comfortable writing what I think because it seems so obvious. But here we go. He is going to have a...

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The only thing I can think of that makes him come off looking good is that maybe he wanted to be with you when he found out. But For various...

miranda-adria − NTA I am dumbfounded at the amount of Y-T-A votes here. Just completely flabbergasted. You two already have one child together, so clearly he knows how babies are...

If he was already fully aware that you guys were trying for baby #2, and he knew he was going on this weekend trip to his brother's bachelor party, why...

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As others have stated, it may very well be because of the fact that the kid is going to be born late in the year. But even then, that is...

It may be a disappointing thing to for him to deal with, but he shouldn't be projecting that disappointment in a text message to you.

He should have expressed joy and happiness, and then worried about discussing the pregnancy when he got back home. Edit: In reference to what you added to the original post,...

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If he was already aware that you were pregnant, why didn't he say anything before he left for his trip? Something fishy is going on here, and I think you...

hey-demons-its-me-ya − NTA, He was so cold about this, you have been trying for a baby, it was very reasonable to expect him to be excited and want to know.

Obviously he didn’t need to rush home from the bachelor weekend but to not say anything positive, not any actual acknowledgment really, just “we’ll talk about this later”, kinda seems...

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“He doesn’t want a baby to be born at the end of the year. However we still kept trying” uhhhh why? This seems very odd. Odd that he doesn’t want...

but worse that you both *know* he doesn’t but still kept trying for a baby anyway, knowing that it’d be born at the end of the year if you did...

EDIT: my god OP your edit makes this even worse. “Why would he want to know I’m pregnant” Because he’s the father and you’ve been trying for a baby? ??????...

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Even_Speech570 − NTA but something is going on with your husband. Are you sure he was 100% on board when you decided to go for #2? Also, no matter how...

A few commenters defended the idea of waiting for an in-person reveal but still criticized his outright dismissal and lack of warmth.

[Reddit User] − NTA - all the people calling you an a__hole because you should have waited to tell him in person are being ridiculous and,

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I think, are highly influenced by all those cutesy pregnancy announcements where you tell someone in person with some planned out nonsense.

My first pregnancy I told my husband about over a phone call while I cried uncontrollably about how I didn't want to be pregnant yet (unplanned birth control baby),

baby number two and three were over text, baby number four he just happened to be home when I tested because he has time off work.

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Pregnancy announcements don't have to be crazy special or super important. If you're trying to het pregnant, chances are you'll eventually get pregnant.

The thing you were planning on happened, it's not really life altering or a huge surprise when you've been trying to do it anyways. You didn't call him up and...

You didn't text him and demand that he call you immediately. You made no demands of him, you just gave him some news that should be as much of a...

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And if he already thought you were pregnant because of the chicken smelling or whatever then he should have been even less surprised.

My first thought is that he was reminded he is a husband and parent with looming responsibilities while he's on a get away where he's chosen to put said responsibilities...

Your text reminded him that he has a whole ass family and the responsibilities that come with that and it sobered his weekend away. To which I say, "oh f__king...

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AdministrationThis77 − NTA. Your edit is hilarious "he asked why he would want to know I am pregnant? " What even is that? "I dunno, homie, thought you'd be interested....

"Didn't want you to start telling me I'd let myself go in a few months." "Thought, based on our history, that I'd do you a solid and give you first...

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As to his already knowing based on the tried and true chicken smell test, you should have said "WTF? If *you* knew *I* was pregnant, you should have told me,...

Others kept it sarcastic or blunt to highlight how unreasonable his attitude appeared.

superjudy1 − For various reasons he doesn't want a baby to be born at the end of the year Info - why not?

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[Reddit User] − NTA. I’m perplexed by these Y T A and E S H comments. I’d like to think it’s perfectly acceptable to text something that showed he was...

But a refusal to even acknowledge your message? He’s at a fun weekend away. Not visiting a friend who is convalescing or at a funeral. There’s really not a single...

illumantimess − NTA but your husband is a massive one as are the commenters saying you are

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This exchange reveals how quickly joy over a long-awaited pregnancy can sour when one partner responds with detachment instead of support. While timing and setting matter to some, the near-universal reaction here stresses that a simple expression of happiness or concern should come before any logistical gripes—especially when the couple has been deliberately trying.

Have you ever shared big personal news during an inconvenient moment, and how did the other person react? Do you think pregnancy announcements should always wait for the perfect in-person setting, or is immediate sharing more important in a committed relationship? Share your experiences below.

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