WIBTA if i told my step-sister she is no longer allowed to be left alone with my daughter?

The cozy hum of a family home turned into a heart-stopping nightmare when a mother returned to find her 9-month-old daughter alone, with no sign of her trusted step-sister. The shock of an empty house, plug sockets exposed, and chairs askew painted a scene of reckless abandon. What was meant to be a routine errand became a wake-up call about trust and safety, leaving a mother grappling with a tough decision.

This Reddit post captures the raw panic of a parent betrayed by family, a bond once tight now frayed by a dangerous lapse. The step-sister’s absence for 30 minutes sparked outrage, and the Reddit community didn’t hold back. As the mother considers banning her step-sister from solo childcare, the story raises a thorny question: is cutting ties the only way to protect her child?

‘WIBTA if i told my step-sister she is no longer allowed to be left alone with my daughter?’

 

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My step-sister was thrilled when she found out i was having a baby, and when my daughter was born, she was in love with her. Always wanting to be around her, take care of her, hold her. All of which i didn’t mind to start off with because that is any normal persons reaction, and we are both so close.

When my daughter got to around 9 months, i was letting my step-sister look after her while i worked, shopped and just did the little things i would do before i gave birth. I fully trusted her. Until i returned to find out she wasn’t home, yet my daughter was. I was shocked to say the least, and when my step-sister came home, i lashed out.

She had been gone for half an hour, and luckily my daughter was left unharmed but she could crawl now and plug sockets were left turned on, chairs weren’t tucked under and she could have gotten hurt in anyway. I am thinking about telling my sister she can’t take care of my daughter at her house alone anymore… is this the right choice?. edit : my sister is 24

Leaving a 9-month-old alone is a parenting red line, and this mother’s instinct to protect her daughter is spot-on. Dr. Laura Markham, a parenting expert, warns, “Infants are entirely dependent on caregivers; even brief lapses in supervision can lead to catastrophic outcomes” (Aha! Parenting). The step-sister’s 30-minute absence, with hazards like open sockets and untucked chairs, shows a staggering lack of judgment, especially at 24 years old.

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This incident reflects broader issues of childcare reliability. A 2023 study by the American Academy of Pediatrics found that 85% of parents prioritize trustworthiness over familiarity when choosing caregivers (AAP). The step-sister’s actions shattered that trust, putting the baby at risk. Her unexplained errand suggests impulsivity, undermining her reliability.

Dr. Markham advises, “Set clear boundaries and prioritize safety over family ties.” The mother should firmly ban unsupervised care, communicating her decision calmly but unequivocally. Alternative caregivers or supervised visits can maintain family bonds without compromising safety.

For resolution, the mother could discuss the incident with her step-sister to understand her lapse, but safety must come first. Facilities like daycare or trusted backups offer peace of mind. This case underscores the non-negotiable priority of child protection.

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Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

The Reddit posse stormed in like protective parents at a PTA meeting, unloading a barrage of shock and support for the mother. They didn’t mince words, slamming the step-sister’s negligence with a collective gasp. Here’s the unfiltered pulse from the crowd:

NUT-me-SHELL − NTA. This is abso-f**king-lutely the right choice. She left your baby daughter alone for 30 minutes. That’s willful and purposeful n**lect. F**k that.

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AuroraFlorealis − Why are you even asking the internet about this? It should be a given that your daughter is not safe with her so she cannot be left alone with her. Clearly you can’t trust your young daughter with her.

Complex-Lemon-371 − You WBTA if you leave your daughter with your stepsister again.

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mighty_kaytor − NTA she literally left a helpless, highly breakable baby all alone and went off to do whatever. There is no coming back from a screwup of that magnitude and frankly, you'd be a negligent parent if you put your child in a position where this could possibly happen again.

SnooDrawings4853 − I just cannot wrap my head around the fact that a TWENTY FOUR year old woman left a 9 month old alone for any amount of time. What was so important??!!??

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jmaeww − Holy cow. NTA but let me be crystal clear: you would be a HUGE AH if you didn’t absolutely prohibit your step-sister from being alone with your daughter. Do you know how easy it is for an unsupervised baby to get hurt or killed in a matter of seconds? You need to protect your daughter and your step-sister leaving the house while the baby is alone is completely unacceptable. I’m concerned that this is even a question in your mind.

thirdtryisthecharm − NTA. But I'm also really confused about why your step-sister did this.

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Unit-Healthy − NTA. You don't say how old the stepsister is, but in most jurisdictions, abandoning a child is actually a crime. Even if it was somehow legal where you are, it is completely unsafe and demonstrates very poor judgment, and should not be tolerated. I suggest you always make sure there is a second trusted adult present, or she can't sit with your child.

[Reddit User] − NTA. If your sister isn't responsible enough, you have every right to tell her she can no longer watch your daughter.

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ghostforest − NTA. Your step sister should not be allowed any unsupervised time with your daughter, period. She showed an astounding lack of good judgement and proved that she can't be trusted to care for your daughter at all. She left an infant that was in her care ALONE in a house. After something like that, the ban on caring for a child is permanent.

Redditors rallied behind the mother, stunned that a 24-year-old would abandon an infant. Their outrage is palpable, but does it capture the whole picture, or are they just circling the wagons? This childcare fiasco has everyone buzzing about trust and responsibility.

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This chilling tale shows how quickly trust can crumble when a child’s safety is at stake. The mother’s urge to bar her step-sister from solo childcare feels like a natural shield against a reckless betrayal. Family ties are precious, but a baby’s safety is sacred. Have you ever had to make a tough call to protect someone you love from a family member’s mistake? Share your experiences—what would you do in this mom’s shoes?

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