[Update] The guy (29m) I’m (25f) dating and his friends “gatekeeped” me about my hobbies and career, I’m feeling embarrassed.

Imagine this: you muster the courage to end a shaky three-month romance, hoping for closure over a phone call that’s equal parts awkward and liberating. That’s where our 25-year-old redditor landed after a disastrous Hooters dinner turned her boyfriend “Dan” from charming to cringe. Last time, we unpacked the night she felt like a trivia trophy—quizzed by Dan’s tech-bro crew while he played cheerleader instead of shield.

Now, she’s called it quits, and the fallout’s a mix of “I don’t knows,” angry texts, and one surprising ally. For those who want to read the previous part: The guy (29m) I’m (25f) dating and his friends “gatekeeped” me about my hobbies and career, I’m feeling embarrassed.

This breakup wasn’t just about wings and bad vibes—it’s a reckoning with respect, or the lack thereof. Was her exit justified, or did Dan deserve a second shot? Let’s dive into the call, the aftermath, and what it all means.

‘[Update] The guy (29m) I’m (25f) dating and his friends “gatekeeped” me about my hobbies and career, I’m feeling embarrassed.’

That phone call was a neon sign flashing “Dan’s not getting it.” Her laying out how the dinner felt—like a gatekeeping gauntlet—met with his “I don’t know” mantra shows a guy who’d rather deflect than reflect. Calling out the absurdity of quizzing friends like it’s a game show? Spot on. It’s not “fun” when it’s one-sided and dismissive.

Psychologist Dr. Susan Krauss Whitbourne notes, “Empathy in conflict is key—minimizing a partner’s feelings signals a disconnect”. Dan’s irritation at her “attitude” and shock at the breakup scream entitlement, not accountability. His post-call texts—sorry one minute, salty the next—reek of desperation, not growth. A 2023 study from the Journal of Social Psychology found 68% of breakups stem from unmet emotional needs, and Dan’s failure to back her up fits the bill.

The friend’s apology? A rare glimmer of hope—proof not all Dan’s circle is tone-deaf. She’s wise to end it; Dan’s not ready to prioritize her over his ego. Advice? Block the texts, lean on that gut, and find folks who lift, not quiz. What’s your take—did she dodge a bullet?

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Reddit’s takes from the first post still echo—here’s a recap:

“Dan’s a creep!” and “You deserve better!” ruled the day. Now, with his friend’s “I messed up too,” the crowd’s likely cheering her exit. Fair call, or overreaction?

So, breakup done, glitter settled—Dan’s out, and she’s free from the poodle parade. The call exposed his cluelessness; his texts cemented the cringe. That friend’s olive branch? A small win in a big mess. Three months isn’t long, but one night can rewrite the script. She’s not overreacting—she’s reclaiming respect. Would you have given Dan a redo, or cut ties too? Hit us with your thoughts—let’s unpack this!