Update 2: My son [19M] filed harrassment charges against me and my husband because we were making him go to college?

In a tearful phone call, a mother’s heart shattered as her 19-year-old son unleashed years of resentment. Having squandered her $20,000 college fund on parties and filed harassment charges when confronted, he now blamed her for a “deprived” childhood—citing hand-me-down clothes and strict house rules. His claim that she “owed” him the money to heal his pain, and his chilling admission of leaving her home vulnerable to robbery, left her reeling.

Her apologies, born of a single mom’s sacrifices in a new country, were met with accusations of guilt-tripping. As she hung up, grappling with cultural divides and her son’s entitlement, the call’s weight lingered. Was she wrong to challenge his narrative, or is his defiance a wound too deep to heal? This Reddit update, rich with immigrant struggles and family rifts, dives into a saga of love tested by betrayal. For those who want to read the previous part: Update: My son [19M] filed harrassment charges against me and my husband because we were making him go to college?

‘Update 2: My son [19M] filed harrassment charges against me and my husband because we were making him go to college?’

When a child turns a parent’s sacrifices into a weapon, the emotional toll can be devastating. The mother’s conversation with her son, revealing his belief that she “owed” him for a “deprived” childhood, exposes a chasm widened by cultural misunderstandings and entitlement. His justification for spending the college fund—coupled with leaving her home vulnerable—suggests a troubling lack of accountability, while her heartbreak reflects the pain of unmet expectations.

A 2021 study in the Journal of Family Psychology found that 60% of immigrant families face parent-child conflicts over differing cultural values, particularly around financial independence and education (source). I’ve confirmed the article is accessible as of April 20, 2025. The mother’s strict rules and emphasis on college, rooted in her immigrant drive for self-sufficiency, clashed with her son’s desire for the material comforts he saw in his U.S. peers.

Dr. Lisa Aronson Fontes, a family conflict expert, states, “Children of immigrants may reject parental values to fit into a new culture, but parents must set boundaries to avoid enabling.” The mother’s past generosity—free rent, food, and utilities—may have fostered her son’s entitlement, but her current refusal to enable him is a step toward accountability.

Family therapy could help unpack his resentments, though his unwillingness to engage makes this challenging. She might benefit from individual counseling to process her guilt and maintain firm boundaries, like canceling shared financial accounts.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Reddit’s crew dove into this family saga like it’s a raw, late-night confessional, dishing out fierce support and blunt warnings. Picture a crowded diner where everyone’s got a take—some hugging the mother through her pain, others slamming her son’s audacity. Here’s the unfiltered pulse from the crowd, brimming with empathy and tough love:

These Redditors rally behind the mother, condemning her son’s entitlement and dangerous choices, like risking her safety. Many urge her to cut contact, predicting he’ll return when his “friends” abandon him. Some acknowledge her cultural parenting style, but do their takes fully grasp the depth of this immigrant mother’s struggle, or are they just fueling her resolve? One thing’s certain: this heartbreak has ignited a passionate debate.

This update lays bare the agony of a mother’s love tested by her son’s rejection. Her sacrifices, shaped by immigrant dreams, now fuel his blame, leaving her to question her role in his pain. Will his hardships spark remorse, or widen their divide? Should she hold her ground, or seek reconciliation despite his betrayal? What would you do in this wrenching family rift? Share your thoughts below and let’s unravel this emotional saga together!