My selfish parents and siblings are trying to get back in my life just because my wife is pregnant, aita for kicking them out of my home?
When long-broken family ties resurface at life’s most delicate moments, deciding whom to welcome back into your life becomes especially painful. For the OP, after two years of silence and abandonment following his controversial marriage, his parents and siblings reappear solely because his wife is pregnant.
Although they claim they now want to mend old wounds and be present for the grandchild, the OP sees this as opportunistic and self-serving. Torn between his own well-earned emotional boundaries and his wife’s gentle appeals for reconciliation for the child’s benefit, he ultimately chooses to protect his new family by kicking them out.
‘My selfish parents and siblings are trying to get back in my life just because my wife is pregnant, aita for kicking them out of my home?’
Family therapist Dr. Laura Emerson explains, “When toxic dynamics have long been established, reopening those channels for convenience—even if it’s driven by a significant new event—can jeopardize emotional stability. Boundaries are essential, not just for personal well-being but to create a healthy environment for children.”
In this situation, the OP’s decision to keep his family at arm’s length isn’t about rejecting a chance for reconciliation. It’s about protecting himself and his new family from inevitable heartbreak and toxicity. His family’s sudden desire to reinsert themselves into his life appears to be motivated solely by the prospect of being involved in the child’s upbringing, ignoring the years of absence and neglect.
Dr. Emerson emphasizes that, particularly in blended families or those with a history of abandonment, stable and predictable relationships are essential for a child’s growth. While it is healthy to forgive and move forward, it is equally important not to reintroduce individuals who have proven themselves unreliable or harmful, regardless of their newfound interest in being present.
See what others had to share with OP:
Many commenters applaud the OP’s decision to maintain strong boundaries. They argue that exposure to toxic relatives who only show up when it benefits them can do more harm than good. Several users point out that a loving environment for a child should not come at the expense of enduring family drama, and that the long-term emotional welfare of the child may be compromised if such toxic influences are allowed back in.
This story spotlights the difficult balance between the desire for familial connection and the need to protect one’s emotional well-being—and that of the next generation. While traditional views might encourage forgiving and moving on, the OP’s experience with abandonment and selfish behavior fuels his decision to maintain his distance.
Is it more important to attempt reconciliation for the child’s sake, or is safeguarding a toxic past sometimes the healthier choice? We invite you to join the conversation: What are your thoughts on reopening family ties when the intent appears purely self-serving? Share your experiences and insights on where the line should be drawn.
