My (24F) dad (62M) is currently going out with a girl younger than I am (23F). I have no idea how to deal with this situation – what can I do?

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Imagine a sunny family BBQ, burgers sizzling, laughter in the air—until your 62-year-old dad strolls in with a girlfriend younger than you. That’s the jarring reality a 24-year-old woman faced when her father, fresh off a divorce, introduced his 23-year-old partner. Her stomach churned, not from the food but from the awkward sight of her dad gushing over his “old soul” love. Caught between love for her father and unease, she’s left questioning family ties and personal boundaries.

This Reddit tale isn’t just a quirky anecdote—it’s a raw snapshot of modern family dynamics, where age-gap relationships stir debates on love, propriety, and respect. As the young woman navigates her discomfort, we’re drawn into her struggle: how do you honor your parent’s choices while grappling with a situation that feels so… off? Let’s dive into this juicy drama and unpack the mess.

‘My (24F) dad (62M) is currently going out with a girl younger than I am (23F). I have no idea how to deal with this situation – what can I do?’

Three years ago, my (24F) parents (62M and 61F) divorced. I'm their only child and live in my own apartment, while my mom got the family house and my dad bought a new place. They've always been on friendly terms through their separation, which has certainly made some things a lot easier.

But my dad's actions following their split have been causing issues. My dad seemed to rebound pretty hard after the divorce. He started frequenting bars and going on blind dates most evenings. I can't lie, my mom and I worried that he wasn't coping well with the split, but he reassured us both that he was a grown man and that we shouldn't be worrying about him.

I acknowledged that, and tried to step back and not meddle in his love life. Nothing crazy came of it, and we didn't talk about it much. About a month ago, dad met up with me and mom to tell us about a new relationship he was in. To our surprise, he pulled out his phone and showed us his new girlfriend - a 23 year old.

Neither of us really knew what to say, as my dad gushed about how wonderful she was and how she was an 'old soul' who he had a profound connection with. He kept on and on until my mom essentially asked what the hell he was doing with a girl younger than his daughter. To be clear, the dates he told us about in the past had always been around his age.

My dad didn't take mom's question well, arguing that she was a consenting adult and he wasn't forcing her to be with him. My mom acknowledged that it was legal, to which my dad was like 'then if you can't support us it's your problem'. We didn't know how to feel about this.

I know it's not illegal, and if they both want to they can do whatever they want, but I can't deny it makes me uncomfortable. Last weekend my mom had a family BBQ and my dad asked if he could bring his girlfriend and introduce us. I arrived and they were already there, and honestly within two seconds of speaking to dad's girlfriend, I felt so bad for her.

She just seemed so childlike and nervous, and I felt super uncomfortable for her being in this situation. Meanwhile my dad was going around to the family talking about how great their relationship is, and how he's '23 at heart'. People were clearly weirded out and he didn't seem to notice, and he kept making a show of going over and kissing his girlfriend.

So yeah, I don't know how to feel about this. I don't like the relationship, but is it even my place to do anything about it? It's at a point where I dread seeing my dad because I know he'll talk endlessly about his girlfriend, then I just remember her face at the BBQ and feel so weirded out.

My mom doesn't like it either but says he has to work it out on his own. If I try to tell him how I feel, what would I even say? I'm just at a loss, and don't know what to do. TLDR: My dad is dating a girl younger than me and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I don't know how to deal with this situation.. ​

Family BBQs are for bonding, not awkward side-eyes, yet this daughter’s unease is palpable. Her father’s relationship with a woman 39 years his junior isn’t just a personal choice—it’s a public statement, one that left his daughter and ex-wife reeling. He defends it as consensual, waving off concerns with a “23 at heart” quip, while his daughter sees a nervous young woman out of place. The clash? Freedom to love versus family comfort.

Age-gap relationships aren’t rare—about 8% of U.S. marriages involve a 10+ year gap, per the Census Bureau. But when the gap spans decades, it raises eyebrows. Psychologist Dr. Stan Tatkin, an expert in family dynamics, notes, “Significant age differences can strain family systems when values and life stages misalign” (psychologytoday.com). Here, the father’s need for validation seems to overshadow his daughter’s discomfort.

Tatkin’s insight suggests the father’s behavior may stem from post-divorce identity shifts, chasing youth to reclaim vitality. For the daughter, setting boundaries is key. She could say, “Dad, I love you, but this relationship makes me uncomfortable, and I need space from discussing it.” This respects his autonomy while protecting her peace.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

The Reddit crowd didn’t mince words, tossing out advice with equal parts wit and wisdom. From savage clapbacks to practical boundary-setting, their takes are a spicy mix of humor and heart.

search4friend − Find a guy older than your dad to pretend to be your boyfriend and introduce him to your father.

RubyJuneRocket − This is the sort of thing that he’s either going to figure out real soon or not at all. He is either going to have a come to Jesus moment when the young GF does something or says something that makes him feel old as s**t and wake the f**k up . OR.

He’s confusing the energy he is getting from these changes, most likely more frequent s**, whatever ego boost - he thinks that’s who he is now, so he won’t have that come to Jesus moment and he’ll double down like “why can’t you just be happy for me?”.

And then the gf will maybe become his wife until she gets to be around 35 or so and starts getting grossed out by the fact that this older man went after her because now that she’s older she sees the differences in maturity and she has her own come to Jesus moment and divorces him.

PeachState1 − 'Dad, while you are an adult and I cannot control what you do, the fact that you are dating someone who is almost 40 years younger than you and who is one year younger than me is disturbing to me. This is affecting the way I see you, the way Mom sees you, and the way family and friends see you.

It's getting to the point where I do not want to spend time with you because it makes me so uncomfortable. To continue our relationship, I need to set the following boundaries: I will not spend time with you when she is around, and I do not want to talk about her or your relationship.' This is going to be uncomfortable, but better to have one uncomfortable conversation than to be indefinitely uncomfortable every single time you might see him or spend time with him.

Jen5872 − Of course, she looked nervous. She was at a party hosted by her boyfriend's ex wife and the family. That's nerve wracking for anyone. Unless she's totally clueless she knows how ridiculous they look together. Aside from telling him he looks like a fool, there's nothing you can do. It's a relationship that will not last given the very vast age difference so just let it play out. 

[Reddit User] − I would tell your dad straight-up that what he's doing is affecting the way you look at him. That if someone in your social circle was dating a guy his age you and your friends would think the guy was a creep. I would also tell him that you love him and want him to be happy,

but you can't support this particular relationship and don't want to hear about or hang out with his girlfriend. Dudes like your dad need to experience some social shaming to understand that what they're doing is wrong. Most people will tiptoe around it, he deserves a dose of reality.

Creative_Recover − Tell him you're grossed out, that nobody believes he's 23 at heart (nor that his GF is an 'old soul') and it's negatively affecting everyone's image of him. . You can't stop the relationship but that doesn't mean you have to be happy with everything he does. 

RandomReddit9791 − I was in a similar situation with my father. He was 62. She was 26 (younger than me by a decade). He brought her to an event at my home and she was all over him. Lots of PDA. I found it disturbing. I couldn't imagine what they had in common or what their future would look like. Edit to say I don't think your father will react well to anything but acceptance of his relationship, but if he intends to bring her around, I think you should speak your mind and hope he understands.

merlinshairyballs − You know it’s true love when the first thing you have to do is insist it’s legal 🙄

b3mark − 39ish years apart? Your fool of a father is old enough to be her grandfather. The 23F is an adult. They can make their own choices together. Doesn't mean you have to like, accept, or be part of it. I'd suggest to your mom that you two go lc with him. And don't invite him to family or social events.

lesnicole1 − I am in a similar situation. I just refuse to meet her. I listen to my dad and encourage him to be happy but I don’t have to like her/hang out with them.. If they get married, I’ll have to re-evaluate if I’d like to meet her but until then 🤷🏻‍♀️

But do these Redditors nail the solution, or are they just fanning the flames? One thing’s certain: they’re all-in on calling out the dad’s midlife glow-up for what it is—a family fiasco waiting to unfold.

This story of a father’s bold romance and a daughter’s quiet dismay leaves us pondering love, family, and the courage to speak up. The young woman faces a tough choice: confront her dad or let the discomfort fester. What’s your take? Have you ever clashed with a parent’s life choices? How would you navigate this BBQ-level awkwardness? Share your thoughts below and let’s stir the pot together!

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