Am I wrong for sending my ex’s wife the screenshots he send me?

When betrayal and awkward advances collide, it can feel like living in a bad romance novel. After her ex cheated on her while she was pregnant—and then married his mistress within months—OP thought she’d closed that chapter. But for almost two years he’s been slipping her late‑night messages: regretting his marriage, professing undying love, and even reminiscing about shared memories, all while his new wife looks on in photos.

Tired of blinking red flags and “drunk confessions,” OP decided to shine a light on his double life. She forwarded the screenshots to his wife, hoping to end the charade. Now he’s screaming that she’s a “petty b**ch” and demanding an apology. In a tangled web of exes, wine‑soaked texts, and broken vows.

‘Am I wrong for sending my ex’s wife the screenshots he send me?’

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

When an ex repeatedly breaches your boundaries, it can trigger old wounds as deeply as the original betrayal. Psychologist Dr. John Gottman reminds us, “Trust broken is never fully restored,” and persistent unwanted messages only reopen the scar of infidelity. Ignoring those messages can sometimes feel like letting a ghost haunt your present, while confronting them can force the ex to face the consequences of their actions.

Boundary setting is an act of self‑preservation. Relationship expert Brené Brown teaches, “Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love yourself, even when we risk disappointing others.” By forwarding the texts, OP drew a firm line: she would no longer be a sounding board for his regrets or a secret booty call for his mid‑marriage doubts.

Confronting the ex’s wife with evidence can feel harsh—but it disrupts the cycle of secrecy and manipulation. Family therapists note that secrecy empowers deceit, while transparency demands accountability. When OP shared the screenshots, she invited the wife to join the conversation and forced her ex to confront the reality of his conflicting loyalties.

Ultimately, forgiveness is a choice, not an obligation. Experts agree that genuine remorse requires more than words—it demands changed behavior and respect for new boundaries. OP’s decision to expose the messages was a way to protect her own peace and to refuse the role of emotional safety net for a man who had already proved unworthy of it.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

The consensus was overwhelmingly in OP’s favor. Readers praised her for refusing to be the safety net for a man who’d already betrayed her, applauding her courage in breaking the cycle of secrecy.

Many urged her to go full no‑contact—blocking his number and using a monitored co‑parenting app—and to keep sharing proof if he tried to gaslight her. Overall, commenters agreed she did the right thing protecting her own peace and informing his wife.

Old betrayals can resurface in the form of unsolicited apologies and flirtations, but true closure comes from enforcing boundaries and seeking transparency. OP’s choice to share her ex’s messages reminds us that peace of mind is worth more than obsessing over what-ifs. Have you ever exposed a cheating ex’s behavior to protect yourself or others? How did you handle the fallout? Share your stories and insights below.