Am I wrong for going on a trip with my wife and leaving our child with my parents?

Ten years of marriage, a milestone glowing with love and shared dreams, prompted a couple to plan a romantic escape to Italy’s sun-drenched shores. Their hearts fluttered at the thought of pasta-laden dinners and starlit strolls, a rare chance to reconnect. But their joy hit a snag when friends branded their decision to leave their 2-year-old with grandparents as selfish, even neglectful, casting a shadow over their celebration.

This isn’t just about a vacation. It’s a heartfelt tug-of-war between nurturing a marriage and parenting duties, wrapped in the sting of judgment. The couple’s story, shared on Reddit, resonates with anyone who’s faced criticism for carving out couple time. It’s a tale of love, balance, and standing firm against unsolicited opinions.

‘Am I wrong for going on a trip with my wife and leaving our child with my parents?’

My wife and I will be celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary next May and want to go to Italy for a week to celebrate. We had wanted to go for our 5 year anniversary but COVID hit just then. We have a 2 year-old who my parents have agreed to take care of while we travel.

While we'd love to take her along, we also wanted this to be just 2 of us since it's our anniversary and we hardly get to do this any more. Plus our daughter will be only 3 years old and we'd rather take her on trips like this when she actually remembers them.

Was telling some friends about this yesterday and they pretty much called us AH. They have a toddler too and said they would never leave him with the grandparents. They also hinted at it being kinda selfish and neglectful.. So am I the a**hole?

This anniversary trip drama highlights the tightrope walk of balancing couple time with parenting. The couple’s choice to leave their toddler with grandparents is practical—celebrating a milestone while ensuring their child’s care. Yet, their friends’ harsh judgment reflects a broader societal expectation that parents, especially mothers, must always prioritize kids over personal needs.

Parenting guilt often stems from cultural pressures. The couple’s friends may project their own values, but leaving a child with trusted family is far from neglect. Dr. Laura Markham, a parenting expert, notes, “Strong marriages create stable families.

Couple time isn’t selfish—it’s essential for emotional health.” The couple’s plan fosters their bond, benefiting their child long-term. For parents in similar spots, clear communication with caregivers and checking in via video calls can ease worries. Trusting grandparents to create memories with their toddler is a win-win.

Check out how the community responded:

Reddit’s response to this couple’s dilemma is a spirited rally of support. Most users cheer their decision, emphasizing that a week with grandparents is a gift for both the child and the marriage.

Some share fond memories of their own grandparent stays, while others slam the friends’ judgmental stance with witty jabs, suggesting they’re jealous of the couple’s family support.

clearheaded01 − NTA You and the wife get time to strengthen your marriage, your kid gets amazing time with the grandparents and they get time with their grandchild.... Bonus for everyone!!!

LaCroixLimon − No. Your friends suck.

Anxious_Western293 − some of my best memories growing up was staying with my grandparents while my parents were busy/out of town. your kiddo will be fine :) enjoy italy!!

littlescreechyowl − Not wrong. Is your child going to be safe, happy and well cared for? Then go. We didn’t go out or travel much when our kids were little. We could have, we just didn’t feel like we should leave them behind. But they would have been fine.

They would have stayed with their papa, eaten donuts and fruit for 3 meals a day, played outside covered in sunscreen until they were exhausted and watch boxing, horse racing and cowboy movies all night.. Go.

drrevo74 − They sound fun. Get better friends. If you want to stay married keep doing things as a couple.

VictoryShaft − Your friends are jealous of the support your relationship is getting from extended family.. Thank the family.. Drop the

No-Permit8369 − No. This is also special your parents get to bond with your child.

Alternative-Week-780 − No you are not wrong. Your daughter is unlikely to remember anything at that age and you are insuring she is taken care of by family. Have fun on your vacation

Bricknuts − Tell your friends the internet thinks they suck, and you shouldn’t take any advice from them. Also they are lucky to have you for as long as you continue to put up with their tomfoolery. Also to mind their business.

Roscomenow − What? There is nothing wrong with taking this anniversary trip without your child. You are leaving your child in the care of your parents. Moreover, you can interact with your child with a little face time while you are in Italy. So, your friends are absolute jerks and should be completely ignored.

This couple’s story reminds us that love thrives when nurtured, even if it means a brief pause from parenting. Their choice to trust grandparents and prioritize their marriage is a bold stand against judgment, proving that balance is personal.

Have you ever faced backlash for taking couple time? How do you juggle love and parenting? Share your experiences below and let’s unpack the art of keeping the spark alive!

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