AITA for telling my husband I am going to divorce him for going to the sisters wedding?

In a whirlwind of wedding plans and family drama, one woman found herself at a breaking point, her heart heavy with betrayal. Her husband’s unwavering devotion to his sister’s big day left her feeling like an afterthought, especially after a terrifying car accident landed her in the hospital—alone. The sting of being sidelined in her own marriage sparked a bold ultimatum: divorce. This Reddit tale unravels a story of loyalty, neglect, and the courage to demand better, pulling readers into a storm of emotions that many can relate to.

The clash of family ties and personal worth sets a vivid stage, where a single moment—like a husband’s absence in a hospital room—can shift everything. With raw honesty, this story invites us to explore the cost of staying in a relationship that dims your light. Let’s dive into the original post and unpack this emotional rollercoaster.

‘AITA for telling my husband I am going to divorce him for going to the sisters wedding?’

For the last week span my husband has been trying to make our relationship work, he let me know that he spoke to his sister and she has hired an official coordinator and says she no longer needs my help, she also fired the DJ unsure about the make up artist.

She also told him she does not know where I got, confused and misunderstood the situation of being a bridesmaid. He showed her the messages of her, asking me and telling me the bridesmaid dress color to buy. She didn’t have anything to say, but told him that she never meant for me to be so confused.

He told her he will be walking her down the aisle and then leaving the wedding. He told me I ruined his relationship with his family. He said that I am also losing his family in the process and that they will hate me. I told him in the nine years his family has never cared about me,

I told him that if he was to die tomorrow, no one in his family would reach out to me after the funeral. He didn’t have anything to say after that. I think she knows that it’s 100% true. he said he would like to continue with the divorce. I think that’s the best decision.

I was in a pretty bad car accident I was hit from behind the other driver was going about 50 mph. I ended up in the hospital and called my husband.  He didn’t show up. He said he was too busy with work. his sister the bride lives about five minutes away from where my car accident was And he asked her to go.

She never showed up, I brought that up to him, and he said no one was obligated to go to the hospital until I became conscious. I feel sad that I’m losing such a big part of my life but I know that I deserve someone who cares about me and will put me first in situations that hurt me.

This story is a stark reminder that loyalty in marriage shouldn’t feel like a one-way street. Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, notes in his book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, “A relationship thrives on mutual respect and prioritization” . Here, the husband’s choice to prioritize his sister’s wedding over his wife’s well-being signals a deeper issue of emotional neglect.

The wife’s accident, met with her husband’s absence, underscores a failure to show up when it matters most. Family dynamics often complicate priorities, but dismissing a spouse’s crisis for a sibling’s celebration tips the balance too far. Statistically, 46% of divorces cite emotional neglect as a factor, per a 2023 study by the American Psychological Association . The husband’s defense—claiming no obligation to visit until she was conscious—reveals a troubling detachment.

Broadening the lens, this situation reflects a common struggle: balancing family expectations with spousal loyalty. The wife’s ultimatum, though drastic, is a stand for self-respect. Dr. Gottman advises couples to “turn toward each other” in times of need, a principle the husband ignored. For the wife, moving forward means seeking a partner who values her presence over absence. Couples facing similar conflicts can benefit from open communication or counseling to realign priorities, ensuring both partners feel valued.

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To navigate this, the wife should document key interactions, as Reddit users suggested, and consult a divorce attorney to protect her interests. Rebuilding self-worth through therapy or support groups can also pave the way for healing.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

The Reddit crew didn’t hold back, serving up a mix of fiery support and witty jabs. From popping champagne to toasting karma, their takes were as bold as they were candid. Here’s the unfiltered scoop from the crowd:

[Reddit User] − Nta - wow, I am sad for what you have gone through but glad you see yourself coming out the other side. You don't need toxicity like that and if you are in an accident, for the person who is supposed to love you not even bothering to come and see you, words fail me!! -- 🚩. Time to move on and rebuild. Good luck to you as you face the sunshine you deserve

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Lizardgirl25 − F**k I also sorry… get out please ASAP. If you have the texts take screen shots especially if you have him saying he was to busy for his wife hospitalized having being hit by an auto going 50MPH.. Save the texts from the sister any abusive texts from the family and show them to a divorce attorney!

[Reddit User] − Jfc! NTA. Nine years?! And he didn’t go the hospital. I’m so sorry. I think your future will be so much better without him and his family.

biteme717 − NTA, and sign the divorce papers in front of him with a smile on your face. Hell, pop open a bottle of champagne and make a toast to him. Tell him Karma is a b**ch to people like him and enjoy it when she comes.

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MissMurderpants − Once you can get away. Ghost them all and live the best life you can. They are all trash.. Your stbxh is such a @$@!;:. And I’d get divorced. He can walk her down the isle and then go suckle at his family’s teat.

Sufficient-College55 − INFO: Can you claim any alimony? If yes, please do, and don’t feel bad about taking a single dime. You deserve every bit of consideration for the emotional damage they’ve done to you. I sincerely wish the sister and her husband have a bitter and n**ty divorce in the future. Hope your husband rots his life away too

SnooWords4839 − NTA - You have a spineless husband and deserve better. Get a lawyer and send him back to his family. He will realize what he lost once you are gone.

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lianavan − I truly hope they get what they deserve un the future. I'm sure things will get better for you now..

Spiritual_Step_7474 − Trust me there is much better out there! I know it’s so hard to move past a huge part of your life in this way but my first husband sounds similar to yours. My husband now would never pass up any opportunity to make me feel cared for and loved. Divorce is refreshing and a new beginning! A much brighter future awaits. :)

404_void − For as awful as this shift is now, I think you'll find yourself feeling very peaceful and a lot happier on the other side of this. Single is better than this, and marriage/companionship doesn't need to be this completely horrid.

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These Redditors rallied behind the wife, cheering her resolve to walk away from neglect. Some urged her to secure evidence for legal leverage, while others envisioned a brighter future free from toxic ties. But do their fiery takes capture the full picture, or are they just fueling the drama?

This tale of heartbreak and empowerment reminds us that love should lift, not lower, our spirits. The wife’s courage to choose herself over a neglectful marriage is a powerful step toward healing. As she closes this chapter, the road ahead promises freedom and self-discovery. What would you do if you found yourself sidelined in your own relationship? Share your thoughts and experiences below—let’s keep this conversation going.

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