Am I (21F) wrong for not seeing the age gap wrong in my relationship with my boyfriend (24M)?

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Ever been called out online for a love that feels just right? A 21-year-old woman faces this when her high school romance with her now-24-year-old boyfriend draws flak for their three-year age gap. What started as a wholesome art class connection—shared sketches, prom dates, and church Sundays—gets branded “creepy” by internet strangers.

Her story pulls us into a clash of heart and judgment, where a small age difference sparks big debates about love, respect, and societal norms.

‘Am I (21F) wrong for not seeing the age gap wrong in my relationship with my boyfriend (24M)?’

I met Kenny in high school, I was a freshman and he was a senior but he was never creepy towards me at all. We had an elective together, art class, we sat at the same table and had this project where we had to draw a portrait of each other. We clicked instantly and talked every single day, then he gave me his phone number.

I that same year he invited me to prom and his graduation and we dated very formally I’d say. He never forced me, or expected me to get physical with him at all, we kissed and held hands, cuddled and went on dates, church together on Sundays (even though we aren’t even Christians) most of our bonding was mentally..

He respected my wishes for intimacy and waited until I was ready at 19. The reason why I am bringing this up is because I posted about him in my earlier post and got a lot of DMs from people calling him the “creepy senior”.

Love doesn’t always fit society’s rulebook, but this couple’s three-year age gap shouldn’t raise eyebrows. Starting as high school art class buddies, the 21-year-old woman and her 24-year-old boyfriend built a bond on respect, waiting until she was 19 for intimacy. Yet, online detractors slap a “creepy senior” label on him, ignoring their mutual connection. Her defense of their relationship is grounded—she sees no harm in a gap that’s barely a blip in adulthood.

This uproar reflects a broader obsession with age gaps, often fueled by stereotypes about power imbalances. Their story, though, shows no red flags: no pressure, no exploitation, just shared moments from prom to church. Psychologist Dr. Jesse Bering notes, “Small age gaps in consensual relationships rarely predict issues when mutual respect is present” (Perv: The Sexual Deviant in All of Us). A 2022 Pew Research study backs this, finding 81% of Americans see no issue with gaps under five years in adult relationships.

The online backlash ties to a cultural trend: hyper-scrutiny of relationships, especially on platforms like Reddit. The “creepy” label often stems from worst-case assumptions, not evidence. Here, the couple’s slow, respectful pace defies that narrative. Dr. Bering suggests focusing on behavior—respect, consent—over arbitrary age lines. The woman could ignore the noise or engage critics calmly, sharing her story’s context. She’s not wrong to stand by her love; it’s the critics who need a reality check.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

The Reddit crowd chimed in with a mix of support and shade, tackling age gap stigma with gusto. Here’s a glimpse at their lively takes on this high school love story!

ComfortableZebra2412 − That is really not a huge gap, and sounds fairly innocent at the start.

MrPresident2020 − 21 and 24 is not an age gap worth even mentioning. I guess it feels somewhat significant at that age, but imagine being 30 and 33, there's practically no difference.

Satori2155 − Yeah its totally fine, some people in reddit are just jealous idiots

Sparky_Zell − A senior purposely going up to freshmen girls during lunch, or actively trying to seek out freshmen could definitely be creepy. Having multiple classes together, becoming friends, and then moving on from there. All while waiting until you were 19. Is significantly less so, if it all.

HI_l0la − I don't see anything wrong. It's only 3 years difference and you met in school. Only thing I'm wondering is why you guys spent time at church if you're not Christian. Like, you're going to services but you're not religious?

tothebatcopter − People in the age gap discourse need to touch grass.

1indaT − Not wrong. People are just ridiculous. Ignore them.

Southern_Event_1068 − Creepy seniors are the ones that target and use underclassmen, not a nice boy that fell in love with an underclassman in art class and continues to be in love years later!

aKornCob − We usually let those slide, f**k there's laws that are intentionally made for this exact scenario so that parents don't try to prosecute a boyfriend with such a short age gap. You honestly shouldn't worry about it. Now the ages gap i judge is basically 13 with 18.

Fucker left foot is hanging outside the highschool door while reaching into the middle school. It might be a 5 year gap to most folks, but it's a bit fucked considering it's a period of growth for the young tweens. Also yes, some states actually allow this s**t.

srreusi − Idk why age gap hate has become the new thing on the internet lately. I have a 12 year age gap.

These Reddit reactions, from dismissing the haters to questioning church visits, stir the pot. But do they cut through the noise or add to it?

This woman’s romance proves love can thrive despite a three-year age gap, yet online critics tried to sour it with a “creepy” tag. Her stand isn’t just about defending her boyfriend—it’s about owning her story against snap judgments. When does an age gap matter, and when’s it just noise? Have you faced flak for a relationship that felt right? Drop your thoughts below and let’s unpack the line between love and scrutiny!

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