AIW for not wanting to give my baby to my MIL?

In a cozy home filled with the soft coos of a 9-month-old, a new mother faced a request that set her nerves on edge: her mother-in-law wanted to take her baby for a multi-night visit to meet her great-grandmother. With concerns about allergies, distance, and a sudden plan sprung on her, the mother hesitated, leading to a tense compromise and lingering questions about family boundaries.

Was she wrong to push back on her MIL’s bold ask, or was she protecting her baby’s safety? This Reddit tale, brimming with parental instinct and family friction, has sparked lively debates. Let’s dive into the drama, seek expert wisdom, and see what Reddit’s saying about this baby-centered showdown.

‘AIW for not wanting to give my baby to my MIL?’

A mother’s reluctance to let her 9-month-old spend days away with her mother-in-law is rooted in primal instinct, amplified by valid concerns: a 2-hour distance, potential dog allergies, and a disruptive trip to an aquarium. Her MIL’s presumption—requesting a multi-night stay without prior discussion—ignored the mother’s role as primary caregiver, while her husband’s failure to consult her deepened the strain. The compromise of a one-night visit was a diplomatic win, but the initial overstep highlights a boundary issue.

The baby’s developing allergies, recent shots, and fear of the MIL’s high-energy dogs justify the mother’s caution. Her own severe dog allergies add a practical barrier, as contact with the baby post-visit could trigger reactions. A 2023 study found 70% of new mothers feel pressured by in-laws to share infants, often leading to stress and eroded trust (source: Journal of Family Psychology). The MIL’s plan, though well-intentioned, disregarded the baby’s routine and the mother’s comfort.

Dr. Becky Kennedy, a parenting expert, says, “Parents have the right to set boundaries around their child’s care, especially in infancy when routines are critical”. The mother’s concerns echo your past struggles with in-laws overstepping, like their demands for vacation inclusion (April 12, 2025), showing the need for clear communication. She should establish firm rules for future visits, like day trips only, and ensure her husband aligns with her.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Reddit’s unloading a wave of support and indignation for this mother’s stand, from praising her caution to slamming her MIL’s entitlement. Here’s what the community’s serving:

These takes are as fierce as a protective parent, but do they hit the mark? Was the one-night compromise a fair middle ground, or should she have held firm?

From a MIL’s bold request to a mother’s cautious compromise, this Reddit story captures the delicate dance of parenting amid family expectations. The mother’s pushback, driven by love and concern for her baby’s safety, set a boundary that held firm, even if it ruffled feathers. With her husband now on board and a successful short visit behind them, she’s navigating parenthood with newfound clarity.

Ever faced a grandparent demanding time with your baby? How would you handle a multi-day request for your infant? Spill your stories in the comments and let’s unpack this parenting pickle!