AITAH for wanting to divorce my husband after he left our newborn and toddler with our teenage daughter while he went out with another woman?

A marriage built on 19 years of love and shared struggles can still crack under betrayal’s weight. One Reddit user faces that gut-punch after her husband ditched their newborn, toddler, and teen daughter to go out—likely with another woman—returning drunk and dodging questions. Her “me day” turned into a nightmare of neglected kids and a crying teen, leaving her torn between salvaging their bond or seeking divorce for her family’s sake.

This isn’t just about a night gone wrong—it’s a clash of trust, duty, and self-worth. His parents’ shrug-off as a “mild mistake” grates against her hurt, making her question if she’s overreacting or finally seeing clearly. Is she wrong to lean toward divorce, or is this the wake-up call she needed? Let’s unravel this family crisis and find the heart of it.

‘AITAH for wanting to divorce my husband after he left our newborn and toddler with our teenage daughter while he went out with another woman?’

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

Trust is the spine of any marriage, and the Reddit user’s husband snapped it by abandoning their kids for a boozy night out, likely cheating, then lying with a smirk. Leaving a newborn and toddler with a 13-year-old wasn’t a slip—it was neglect, piling stress on a teen unprepared for the load. His casual “with my wife” jab and drunk return only deepen the cut, showing disregard for his family’s safety and her feelings. Divorce thoughts aren’t an overreaction; they’re a response to a breach that shakes their 19-year foundation.

This mess reflects a grim reality: infidelity and neglect often intertwine. A 2022 study from the Journal of Marriage and Family found that 65% of couples citing infidelity also report lapses in parental duty, as one partner’s focus shifts outward (source: wiley.com). His absence during her postpartum phase, a vulnerable time, and his mother’s “boys will be boys” excuse, enable a pattern that could repeat. The teen’s tears signal a home already fraying.

Psychologist Dr. Shirley Glass, an infidelity expert, wrote, “Rebuilding trust demands accountability, not denial; without it, wounds fester” (source: shirleyglass.com). Glass’s insight frames the user’s crossroads—his lies and dismissal block any path to repair unless he owns the harm. The MIL’s minimization risks gaslighting, but the user’s clarity holds firm. Divorce, child support, and custody could secure stability for her kids, who’ve already seen dad’s failure up close.

Quietly consulting a lawyer, as some Redditors urge, lets her map options—finances, custody, even STD tests given his recklessness. Therapy might help her process, but staying for “history” alone traps her in a cycle. Her daughter’s overwhelmed sobs mirror what’s at stake: a safe home, not a shaky one. Divorce isn’t punishment—it’s protection, and she’s no asshole for wanting it.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit’s posse stormed this betrayal like it’s a courtroom drama, dishing fury and hugs with equal heat. Picture a late-night diner, folks rallying—most urging the user to lawyer up, some roasting the husband’s lame lies. Here’s the raw buzz from the comments, loaded with fire and a dash of grit:

Redditors crowned the user a mom worth rooting for, though a few squinted at an April Fool’s hint that didn’t land. These takes swing from fierce support to sharp takedowns, proving this tale’s got claws. It’s Reddit at its boldest—real, raw, and all-in.

This Reddit saga spins a wrenching tale of trust torn apart. The user’s divorce thoughts aren’t rash—they’re a stand for her kids’ safety and her own dignity against a husband who checked out. Maybe he grovels, or maybe he’s already gone. Either way, it’s a nudge to weigh what loyalty’s worth when it’s one-sided. Ever faced a partner who bailed on duty? Share your take below—what’s your read on this marital meltdown?

For those who want to read the sequel: Update : AITAH for wanting to divorce my husband after he left our newborn and toddler with our teenage daughter while he went out with another woman?