AITAH for wanting to break up with my girlfriend over her skincare/anti aging addiction?
A couple in their early 30s, together three years and living together two, hit a rough patch over her escalating skincare obsession. It started innocently—he supported her Etsy success, master’s graduation, and self-care glow-up—but ballooned into multiple routines dominating daily life.
Sunscreen indoors daily, thick night creams, swimming/language classes on top of work, book writing, and a new YouTube channel. The real killer: prescription tretinoin for anti-aging, causing constant sensitivity, flaking, rashes from kisses or stubble, limiting passion to “soft only.”
‘AITAH for wanting to break up with my girlfriend over her skincare/anti aging addiction?’
The passion begins harmlessly—she builds self-support since 18 via Etsy, adds hobbies like book writing (two done, editing for self-publish), launches true crime YouTube, swims thrice weekly, takes languages:
Night creams/Vaseline feel gross on contact; sun phobia kills beach trips, sunny rooms:
He begs stopping tretinoin (thins top skin layer ongoing); talks flop—she insists it’s normal in communities; proposal hints rise as he pulls back, lease end looms:
Skincare routines can boost confidence, but when they disrupt intimacy, daily joy, and shared activities, they cross into obsession—possibly tied to anxiety, body dysmorphia, or deeper mental health flags like OCD tendencies around control/perfection.
Tretinoin (retinol derivative) aids anti-aging/acne but requires adjustment—ongoing severe irritation eight months in suggests wrong strength/application; dermatologists advise slower ramp-up, buffering, or alternatives. Daily sunscreen indoors aligns with expert recs (UV through windows ages skin), but extreme sun avoidance risks vitamin D deficiency/mood impacts.
Relationship strain from one partner’s fixation highlights imbalance—his valid needs for affection/spontaneity clash with her rigid rules. Encouraging initial passion turning resentment shows communication breakdown; “normal in communities” echoes echo-chamber effect online.
Path forward: Frame concern as worry for her well-being (therapy for potential underlying issues), suggest professional derm consult for routine tweak, couples counseling for compromise. If unyielding, incompatibility looms—intimacy matters long-term.
Check out how the community responded:
Responses mixed—many saw red flags in extreme behavior, urging therapy; others defended basics (sunscreen/tret) as standard while noting obsession level concerning:
Some flagged psychological roots (OCD, anxiety, dysmorphia) and suggested professional help over breakup:
Dermatology insights defended core practices but flagged improper use:
Others validated his frustration, questioned community “normalcy,” or urged no proposal:
Self-care turning life-disrupting obsession strains bonds—valid skincare benefits clash with intimacy loss and joy-sucking extremes here. Community leans concern over judgment—many spot potential mental health roots needing therapy, while basics like sunscreen/tret get defended as standard (if adjusted right).
Extreme sun fear/sensitivity flags deeper issues; communication/counseling urged before lease-end decisions. Ever seen a hobby morph into relationship roadblock? How’d balance return—or not? Thoughts below!
