AITAH for telling my husband I don’t want his mom to come in our vacation with us?

In a cramped two-bedroom home, where six dogs and family tension vie for space, a pregnant woman yearns for one last peaceful vacation with her husband and six-year-old before their baby arrives. Her dream is tested when her husband insists on inviting his entitled mother-in-law, who’s been living with them since financial woes struck. Her plea for a break sparks conflict, pulling readers into a drama of boundaries and family loyalty.

Her Reddit post, laced with frustration, drew a storm of support, with users rallying against her husband’s blind spot for his mother’s demands. It’s a raw tale of a wife’s fight for her family’s space amidst chaos. Let’s dive into her story and the reactions it ignited.

‘AITAH for telling my husband I don’t want his mom to come in our vacation with us?’

You can be honest, I’m okay with being an AH because my husband thinks I am. But ya see let me give ya some background. Last year my MIL was having financial struggles and was going to be let go from her job. Her two daughters didn’t offer to help but my husband being the kind man he is and with my okay told her she could always move out to the west coast where we live.

So she agreed and she brought her 4 dogs and a bunch of her stuff and crammed it into our tiny 2 bedroom house. So in this tiny house there is 3 adults, 6 dogs, a 6 year old and we’re expecting a baby in the fall. As of a few months ago, my SIL wants to move out here and we explained that they should find their own place.

We’ve looked at selling but the markets in no place for that but if it was just my husband and I and our kiddo, we would make it work and when baby is old enough they could share a room until we can sell this house. We were planning to go on one last vacation before baby comes and I made it clear I wanted it to be just the 3 of us.

My husband said it would be rude to not invite her and so he invited her. I was hoping because of her dogs she wouldn’t go. But now she’s making us talk to our neighbor who we are friendly with about watching her dogs and she will pay. I was mad and pregnancy hormones make it hard to hide my frustration.

My husband told me I’m acting like a brat because if it was my mom I’d do the same thing but I told him I wouldn’t because my mom would understand. His mom, she wouldn’t understand. She believes he can do no wrong and she believes she’s entitled.

I mean this is the same person who got angry we went on a trip we planned before she moved here and didn’t invite her. We can’t even have discussions with her because she instantly gets defensive. I really just wanted a trip away from her with my little family before this baby comes and I’m apparently the bad guy and being selfish.

He told me I can be the bad guy and tell her that I don’t want her to go but I already told him before he invited her and it’s not my mom. I’m not the one with boundary issues. So AITAH for Telling him to tell her we don’t want her to come?

UPDATE: I’ve read your comments and finally this morning had a breakdown. He asked me what was wrong and I just spit everything out and we talked things out. He is going to talk to the neighbor about watching the dogs and he’s going to convince the neighbor to just not do it because he also doesn’t want her to go. He said that part of her reasoning for wanting to move here is to go on trips and I do vaguely remember her saying that. We shall see. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Marriage requires balancing family ties, but this woman’s husband prioritizes his mother’s feelings over his wife’s need for rest. His insistence on including his mother-in-law, who dominates their home, ignores the strain on his pregnant partner. Dr. Susan Heitler, a family therapist, notes, “Healthy boundaries with in-laws are crucial for marital harmony.” The husband’s failure to set limits risks resentment, especially during such a vulnerable time.

The woman’s stress, amplified by pregnancy and a chaotic home, reflects the toll of boundary violations. Her mother-in-law’s entitlement—expecting inclusion in every trip—disrupts the couple’s autonomy. This dynamic, left unchecked, could strain their marriage further post-baby.

This story underscores broader issues of in-law dynamics in blended households. The husband’s “mama’s boy” tendencies, as Reddit users call it, hinder his ability to prioritize his nuclear family. His wife’s breakdown was a wake-up call, but lasting change requires ongoing effort to redefine roles.

Couples counseling could help them establish boundaries, ensuring the wife feels heard. She might also benefit from stress-relief practices like mindfulness to cope with the crowded home. Her resolve to reclaim her vacation signals strength, but maintaining clear limits with her mother-in-law will be key to her family’s peace.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Reddit users erupted with support, slamming the husband for sidelining his wife’s needs. Many labeled him a “mama’s boy,” arguing his mother’s entitlement shouldn’t trump his family’s well-being. Some urged the woman to take the vacation alone with her child, leaving him to face his mother’s demands.

Others pushed for counseling and moving the mother-in-law out. These bold takes, spiked with Reddit’s sharp wit, champion the wife’s right to a break. They reflect a collective call for her to demand respect and space.

CF_FI_Fly − NTA It's time for some marital counseling. He needs to get his mom out of the house and prioritize you and your kids.. Otherwise, you don't really have much of a marriage.

Disastrous-Wildcat − Strange how your husband “being kind” means “being kind” to everyone but his wife and the mother of his child. 

Mediocre-Avocado-846 − NTA Your opinion is valid. He may not see that because it's his mom, but if the situation was reversed, he for sure would not like his MIL around all the time (not talking about your mother specifically, people can have the best relationship with in laws but at the end of the day there is always a line).

You also need to talk with him about the time when the baby is atually born. What if your MIL's dogs don't react well to the baby? What then? You'll have to move with the little one just to accomodate his mom? You need to talk to him asap, cause this will only get worse.

Available_Medicine79 − NTA. Tell him if his mommy goes that you and the 6 year old will stay home but he might not be welcome back. He’s not a really kind guy, he’s a mommy’s boy.

Prudent_Okra7311 − Wait you are asking a neighbor to watch SIX dogs?!?!?. That is a very big ask. How long is the vacation?

hiddenkobolds − I'm sorry--. Three adults, *six* dogs, a child, a baby on the way, and y'all have two bedrooms?? Ma'am, you're the next best thing to a saint. This man should be *worshipping the ground you walk on* for helping his mother at such a massive inconvenience.

OF COURSE his mother shouldn't be coming on this vacation! Of course you need a break and a moment's peace! He's calling you an a**hole for that?? I'd be sorely tempted to take the six year old, whichever of the menagerie of pups are yours, and go on the trip without him! Let him consider the absurdity falling out of his mouth while he sits at home with his mother. My god. The nerve of this man.... NTA.

sk1999sk − nta but I don’t think her age has anything to do with her being entitled. she sounds like someone who always gets her way or is rarely told no. you married a mama’s boy.

Nadihaha − NTA how it is a vacation when you’re taking the source of the stress with you.

R4eth − You have a major husband problem, but half the problem is, instead of putting your foot down and nipping it in the bud by giving him a clear 'NO MOM ON VACATION', you just let him decide. And now you're mad at the results.

You're right, it's not your job to manage mil's feelings and lack of boundaries. That's your husband's problem. But, he's shown you over and over, he's completely incapable of doing so. You should give couple's counseling a try, and get mil out of the house. Esh.

Indy-Lib − If your husband doesn't understand why you might need a reprieve from your MIL, then you need to get to counseling. You didn't sign up to live with her, and you're dealing with more than most people would. That you want a break is completely understandable. Tell him you'll take your 6yo alone, and he can stay with his mom.

This woman’s story is a vivid reminder that love means setting boundaries, especially when family dynamics threaten peace. Her husband’s loyalty to his mother nearly stole her chance for a quiet family moment before motherhood expands.

Reddit’s fierce support cheers her stand, urging her to hold firm. Have you ever struggled with in-law boundaries? How did you reclaim your space? Share your thoughts below and let’s unpack this tense family saga together.

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