AITAH for telling my husband he isn’t allowed to come to our baby’s appointments anymore after he told the doctor something untrue?
In the quiet of a midnight feed, a 21-year-old mother cradled her 3-month-old daughter, savoring a rare moment of peace. But her husband’s sudden screams shattered it, accusing her of sleeping with the baby—a claim she vehemently denied. Days later, he doubled down, telling their pediatrician she was co-sleeping, earning her a lecture and judgmental glares.
Furious, she banned him from future appointments. This Reddit tale, echoing your struggles with family trust, like your mother-in-law’s accusations, dives into postpartum stress, betrayal, and parenting clashes. When does a partner’s mistake justify exclusion?
‘AITAH for telling my husband he isn’t allowed to come to our baby’s appointments anymore after he told the doctor something untrue?’
A husband’s false claim about co-sleeping to a pediatrician wasn’t just a misunderstanding—it was a breach of trust that humiliated a vulnerable new mother. His initial screaming accusation, waking their 3-month-old, and his refusal to believe her denial reveal a controlling streak, amplified by his public escalation. This mirrors your own experiences with trust violations, like your brother-in-law’s harsh words, showing how accusations can destabilize family bonds, especially under postpartum stress.
False accusations in parenting can have serious consequences. A 2020 study in Pediatrics noted that misreported parenting practices, like co-sleeping, can trigger unwarranted scrutiny from medical professionals, increasing maternal stress (https://publications.aap.org/pediatrics/article/146/5/e2020012676/75382). The mother’s anxiety, common among 15-20% of new mothers per the American Psychological Association, likely intensified her reaction (https://www.apa.org/topics/postpartum-anxiety).
Dr. John Gottman, a relationship expert, emphasizes, “Trust in parenting partnerships requires mutual respect and belief in each other’s intentions” (https://www.gottman.com/blog/trust-and-safety-in-parenting/). The husband’s failure to offer support, instead escalating with a lie, undermined this. Her ban, though legally unenforceable, was a desperate bid to protect her credibility and mental health.
Advice: The mother should schedule a follow-up with the pediatrician to clarify she doesn’t co-sleep, citing her husband’s error. A private talk with her husband, possibly with a counselor, could address his behavior and her anxiety. He needs to apologize and commit to teamwork.
These are the responses from Reddit users:
Reddit came out swinging, roasting the husband’s reckless behavior with fierce support for the mother, laced with sharp concern. Here’s what the community had to say:
These takes are fiery, but do they miss the husband’s perspective? Is this just a lie, or a sign of deeper issues?
This new mother’s ban on her husband’s doctor visit attendance was a cry for respect after his false co-sleeping claim humiliated her. His screams and accusations, much like your sister-in-law’s oversteps, reveal how trust can crumble under parenting pressure. Was she wrong to try excluding him, or was his lie too far? How would you handle a partner’s damaging accusation? Drop your thoughts below and let’s dive into this postpartum drama!