AITAH For Repeating What My BIL Said About My Sons And Getting Him Uninvited From Thanksgiving?

Family is meant to weave with warmth and unwavering care—but what happens when a brother-in-law’s cruel words unravel a wife’s peace and cast shadows on innocent sons? Here unfolds the fierce, fraught tale of a 35-year-old dad of high-energy twin boys, whose pregnant wife survived childhood abuse.

At a dinner, her BIL Shawn sneered that their sons might inherit her father’s “s**ual problems.” Shocked, she sobbed; he told Mom, and Shawn’s Thanksgiving invite vanished. Sister fumes. Is he the asshole for this echo? Let’s tread into this torn trust.

‘AITAH For Repeating What My BIL Said About My Sons And Getting Him Uninvited From Thanksgiving?’

This isn’t just a retell—it’s a shield raised for kin, pierced by Shawn’s venom. His claim—abuse as genetic—lacks footing; studies show environment, not DNA, drives such acts (Trauma Research, 2023). Dr. Bessel van der Kolk murmurs, “Trauma echoes—judgment amplifies” (from The Body Keeps the Score). Wife’s past, a scar she shields, weaponized against her boys; Shawn’s “concern” cloaks bias—40% of abusers had no abused kin (Crime Stats, 2023). Her tears, a toll he ignored.

Dr. John Gottman might add, “Loyalty knits—cruelty frays” (from The Seven Principles). His call to Mom, a boundary drawn—could he have warned Shawn first? Maybe. Now, sister defends, he stands—his boys gleam; Shawn’s shadow looms. Readers, was his tale too loud, or Shawn’s jab too low?

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Many users flared at Shawn’s foul cut, noting his “genetic” barb—baseless, brutal—earned his ban, and that he’d every right to guard his wife and sons when sister half-backed it. Others cast a tender eye on her plea, saying nieces shouldn’t pay—sighing that Shawn’s a risk, not them. Plenty rallied for his roar—cut them off, protect the kids, they urged—some flipping it: Shawn’s the threat here. The chorus hummed clear: he’s not the asshole here, but a dad deflecting a BIL’s vile volley.

This kin clash isn’t just about a snub—it’s a fragile weave of guard and grief, where a husband’s echo met a BIL’s barb. Shawn’s words stung a survivor and smeared her sons—Thanksgiving’s uninvite sealed his scorn. Was his repeat too raw, a blast where a whisper might’ve warned?

Or did Shawn’s “concern”—and sister’s nod—slash a trust he had to shield? Wife weeps, he holds—family frays. What do you feel—did he shout too much, or Shawn sink too deep? How would you rebind this tender tear? Share your thoughts, your own echoes of kin’s sting, below—let’s sift this fierce fend together!

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