AITAH for refusing to buy Xmas presents for my now ex’s children?

A 37-year-old waitress at a popular tourist spot is facing backlash from her now-ex after refusing to buy Christmas presents for his kids. She pulls in solid tips, sometimes far more than his salary, but he’s constantly belittled her job and lacked support.

After years of covering for his excuses about unemployment and discovering he lied about his degrees, she ended things. Now he’s pressuring her to splurge on gifts for his children, insisting she can afford it – and responding with emotional manipulation, even threatening self-harm when she stands firm.

‘AITAH for refusing to buy Xmas presents for my now ex’s children?’

Her ex Gary has never supported her waitressing job that she loves:

She explains cutting expenses and her successful business background:

Gary keeps asking for financial help after losing his job, now demanding gifts:

She gave an ultimatum, then broke up, and he manipulated with self-harm threats:

This situation screams financial and emotional manipulation from the man. She’s carried most of the economic load while he makes endless excuses and shows zero initiative. Lying about degrees from the start is a massive red flag for dishonesty, eroding trust over time.

Criticizing her job while demanding benefits from her earnings reveals deep hypocrisy and entitlement. His snobbish remarks despite his own failures highlight insecurity and resentment toward her success. Relationship experts often warn that self-harm threats are a common manipulation tactic to retain control, not genuine change.

If truly concerned, report to authorities rather than re-engage. The healthiest path is no contact to safeguard her mental and financial well-being. She did the right thing setting boundaries and walking away.

Now it’s time to find a true equal partner who matches her drive and integrity. Staying would only enable his patterns and drain her further.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

The online community overwhelmingly praised her decision, labeling him manipulative and lazy.

Many urged immediate no-contact and no gifts:

This is a classic case of an imbalanced relationship where one person grinds while the other coasts on excuses and manipulation. Her choice to end it and refuse the gift demands is spot on, especially after the lies and lack of effort.

Almost everyone cheers her on to block him and move forward. What do you think – is his self-harm threat something to worry about, or just a final manipulation play?