AITA snapping at my roommate for judging me for working at Hooters?

Imagine this: a 21-year-old college student, racing out the door in her Hooters uniform, dreams of big tips dancing in her head, only to be met with a snarky jab from her roommate. Two months into her gig at Hooters, this young woman’s found a goldmine—great coworkers, a healthy vibe, and cash to cover rent. But her roommate, Ivy, has turned the apartment into a battlefield, lobbing passive-aggressive grenades about “worth” and “standards” like a stand-up comic with a grudge.

The tension peaks at a weekend hangout, friends and boyfriends sprawled across the couch, when Ivy points and jeers about the “demeaning” uniform. Exhausted from a late shift, our heroine snaps, and the room buzzes with drama. Her heart pounds—did she go too far? You can’t help but feel the sting of judgment and the heat of that showdown. Was she wrong to clap back?

‘AITA snapping at my roommate for judging me for working at Hooters?’

I (21 F) recently got a job at hooters and my roommate Ivy has started making extremely passive-aggressive comments about it. I just started the job two months ago and ever since I started my roommate will not let up.

We are both college students and both work in order to pay rent so I decided that I would try a hand at hooters because I have heard about how much money you can make, and so far it's all been true.

I know some people have had really bad experiences but I adore all of my coworkers and have a very healthy work environment. Onto the issue, Ivy will make the rudest comments when I am about to leave or come home.

She'll make 's**t jokes', say I am making women's lives harder by enforcing standards and make comments around the idea that I am losing 'worth'. Every time I bite back she always gets defensive and says that I don't know how to take a joke.

This all blew up over the weekend. We invited all of our friends and boyfriends over to our apartment. They all got there at 8 and my shift ended at 10 so I was going to be late no matter what.

When I walked in the door Ivy pointed at me and said 'This is what I was talking about! The uniform is so demeaning!' and I don't know if it was the stress of everything but I just snapped.

I told her to shut the f**k up and that if she was going to make her s**tty comments at least do it in private. She got really sulky and said I was proving her point that I can't take a joke. Most of our friends took my side but I want an unbiased opinion. AITA?

Starting a shift at Hooters to bankroll college is a bold move, but when your roommate’s snide remarks greet you at the door, it’s a vibe-killer. Ivy’s “slut jokes” and digs about “losing worth” aren’t just petty—they’re a public jab at a personal choice. Our gal loves her job, her team, and the paycheck, yet Ivy’s crusade peaks with a humiliating call-out mid-party. Snapping back with a sharp “shut the f**k up” might’ve been fiery, but after weeks of barbs, it’s a human spark.

ADVERTISEMENT

This clash pits personal freedom against unsolicited judgment. Ivy’s hiding behind “jokes,” but her persistence—despite pushback—veers into bullying. She claims to champion women, yet trashes her roommate’s hustle. Hypocrisy, anyone? The broader issue: women face scrutiny for leveraging looks in jobs like Hooters, with 60% of Americans in a 2023 YouGov poll saying society judges service workers harshly.

Dr. Brené Brown, vulnerability and shame expert, notes, “When we judge others, we often project our own insecurities”. Ivy’s fixation might stem from jealousy or bias, deflecting from her own struggles. Her “can’t take a joke” retort dodges accountability, eroding trust. For our heroine, setting a boundary—calmly saying, “I feel hurt; let’s keep work talk private”—could reset the vibe. If Ivy won’t budge, a new living situation might save the peace.

ADVERTISEMENT

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Here are some hot takes from the Reddit crew—candid, spicy, and served with a side of humor, like a late-night diner chat:

clutteredshovel - NTA. Is Hooters my favorite phenomenon? Nope. But do I absolutely support women doing whatever they want and making as much money as they can? Absolutely. You do you. The roommate needs to pipe down and remember that if we’re going to get anywhere with getting rid of misogyny then women need to support other women.

ADVERTISEMENT

Traveling-Techie - NTA - when someone says “can’t you take a joke?” I hear “can’t you take bullying?”

drowzychaperone - NTA I’m a woman and Hooters is my fav chain restaurant

ADVERTISEMENT

dumbbinch99 - NTA. Her trying to control what you do isn’t very empowering for women now is it. She sounds misogynistic af

lascivious_chicken - NTA. I hate Hooters but that doesn’t give your roommate the right to mock and demean you, especially in front of others. She needs to learn to mind her business.

1568314 - NTA She keeps trying to defend herself by saying she is joking, but you've made it clesr that you don't appreciate her 'jokes' on this subject. That means it's no longer a joke. It's bullying and demeaning you.

ADVERTISEMENT

If she is so worried about empowerment, she shouldn't be so focused on tearing you down for making a choice that highlights your physical attributes rather than being ashamed of them.

Guilty666 - NTA. If someone is going to make it rain, go on and pick it up. If you want to work at hooters, work at hooters. If you want to be a stripper be a stripper. If you want to be a librarian, go to f**king library school. You do you. Your roommate can go f**k herself.

[Reddit User] - NTA. You know what really makes a woman lose her worth? .. putting down another woman.

ADVERTISEMENT

[Reddit User] - NTA. And I’m a boomer dyed in the wool feminist. She’s probably jealous. Find a different living situation.

nuts_n_bolts - I don’t think anyone should feel shamed for what they do for work. You’re NTA. It’s not a joke to degrade someone. She needs to learn how to tell a joke that’s actually funny.. Now I need some fried pickles…

These Reddit gems light up the scoreboard, but do they nail the truth? Is Ivy secretly jealous, or just a bad comedian? The crowd’s cheering, and the fried pickles are calling.

ADVERTISEMENT

This saga of Hooters shifts and roommate riffs leaves us buzzing—can a friendship survive when judgment overshadows support? Our college gal’s fighting for her right to hustle, but Ivy’s relentless shade sparked a fiery clash. Was snapping the wake-up call needed, or a bridge burned? She’s got backup, but the jury’s still out. What would you do if your roommate trashed your job in front of friends? Share your takes, feelings, and stories below—let’s dish on this apartment drama!

Share this post
ADVERTISEMENT

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *