AITA: No kids on vacation?

Picture a couple, married 13 years, finally booking a dream getaway to LA—no kids, just sun-soaked freedom. For this East Coast mom of four, it’s a rare chance to trade diaper bags for cocktails and reconnect with her husband. But her friend, a frequent user of her babysitting generosity, throws a wrench in the plan. After inviting herself on this adults-only trip, the friend announces she’s bringing her 1-year-old and 15-year-old, expecting help with childcare.

The woman’s refusal to play vacation nanny sparks a chilly silence from her friend. Now, she’s left wondering if she’s the villain for guarding her long-overdue break. This Reddit saga dives into the tension between friendship loyalty and personal boundaries, pulling us into a drama where saying “no” feels like a rebellion. Can she hold her ground without guilt?

‘AITA: No kids on vacation?’

Planning a child-free vacation only to face a friend’s last-minute kid addition is a recipe for tension. The OP’s friend, accustomed to leaning on her for frequent childcare, assumed this dynamic would extend to their LA trip. By deciding to bring her 1-year-old and 15-year-old without prior agreement, she disregarded the OP’s clear boundary of an adults-only getaway, creating a power imbalance in their friendship.

This scenario reflects a broader issue: the strain of one-sided relationships. A 2022 study by the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that 60% of people report feeling used in friendships where favors, like childcare, go unreciprocated. The OP’s experience—babysitting for minimal pay while covering expenses—fits this pattern, amplifying her frustration.

Dr. Irene Levine, a friendship expert, states, “Healthy friendships thrive on mutual respect and clear communication about expectations”. The friend’s failure to secure a sitter and her expectation that the OP’s family step in violates this. Her late pickups and unpaid debts further signal entitlement, not friendship.

Advice: The OP is right to prioritize her vacation’s purpose. She should maintain her stance, communicate boundaries firmly, and consider distancing from this friend if the pattern persists. For readers, setting expectations early—like confirming trip rules—can prevent similar conflicts. Resources like The Friendship Doctor blog offer tips on navigating unbalanced friendships.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Reddit didn’t mince words, serving up a buffet of support for the OP’s stand. From calling the friend “entitled” to urging the OP to stop being a “doormat,” the community’s takes are as bold as LA’s sunsets. Here’s what they had to say.

These Reddit opinions are spicy, but do they hit the mark? Is the friend a user, or just disorganized?

The OP’s firm “no” to her friend’s kids is a masterclass in reclaiming her space. After years of parenting and unpaid babysitting, she deserves a break, not a babysitting gig disguised as a vacation. This story reminds us that friendships shouldn’t feel like indentured servitude. What would you do if a friend tried to hijack your kid-free getaway? Share your thoughts—have you ever had to set a hard boundary to protect your peace?