AITA for telling my sister I don’t want anything from her?

A pregnant 22-year-old woman has drawn a hard line with her 25-year-old sister: no gifts, no shopping trips, no auntie roles—nothing. The rift isn’t new; it’s a lifetime of cruelty, lies, and a betrayal on graduation night that nearly cost her her high school sweetheart. Now, with a daughter on the way, her sister refuses to open the door again.

Parents plead “family first,” but the scars run deeper than blood. From childhood horror stories to public humiliation and attempted seduction, trust isn’t just broken—it’s burned. This isn’t sibling rivalry; it’s self-preservation.

‘AITA for telling my sister I don’t want anything from her?’

The sisters’ war began in childhood, built on fear and dominance.

I (22f) have an older sister (25f) who I have never gotten along with. Our issues come from how different we are paired with how uncaring she is about people...

Like our cousin Michelle and her never had a good relationship either and she even slept with Michelle's boyfriend, and then bragged about it to all the kids in school...

With me and my sister, it has always been one thing after another. As a kid she used to tell me my bedroom was a place bad stuff happened in...

and would make up stories about that stuff to scare me. When I first started having periods they were really heavy and she told me that was a sign I...

She embarrassed me in front of kids from school another time by telling them about a time I puked all over myself at a wedding and even even said we...

Control extended to every shared moment, culminating in the ultimate betrayal.

Then the few times she seemed to try and be close it was only stuff she liked. She would not let me pick or even let me order what I...

And then she tried to sleep with my husband. He's my high school sweetheart and this was at our graduation. So I have been done with her for a while.

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Pregnancy triggered a sudden auntie campaign—one the poster rejected outright.

I am now expecting a daughter and ever since this was announced she has been trying to bond, trying to get an in, and I'm not interested. She sent me...

She asked me what I wanted from her and I told her I wanted nothing from her. Then I said well she could leave me and my family alone. She...

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She told our parents and they think I'm making a mistake. They have told me I might be glad for her one day. But I don't trust her. I don't...

Family therapist Nedra Glover Tawwab asserts that “blood relation does not entitle anyone to access, especially when harm is the pattern.” In her book Set Boundaries, Find Peace (2021), she writes: “Forgiveness is optional; safety is not.” Simultaneous with parental guilt-tripping is the sister’s history of escalation—from lies to seduction. Beyond that, pregnancy heightens stakes: a newborn deserves a village, not a viper.

Opposing views lean on “family forever,” yet this ignores generational trauma loops. What makes the story more complicated is the cousin parallel—opportunistic reconciliation only when status rises. Parallel to this, the graduation incident wasn’t youthful folly; it was predatory. The knot tightens with parents enabling denial, pressuring the victim to absorb risk.

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Socially, women are conditioned to preserve harmony at personal cost. A 2023 Pew study found 62% of adults maintain contact with harmful relatives due to obligation. True kinship earns its seat at the table—love, respect, consistency. The poster chooses protection over performance.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Users backed the poster with zero hesitation, citing the husband incident as the unbreakable dealbreaker.

[Reddit User] − NTA. ...SHE TRIED TO SLEEP WITH YOUR HUSBAND. That’s all I need to read to know you should never let this woman near you or your family...

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SoValkyrieMama − NTA. She is toxic. You don’t need her around and you certainly don’t want to set her up as a role model for your child. If “family” was...

theaardvarkoflore − NTA. I have a sibling who behaves this way, and I gotta tell you, my life has been sooooo much happier and more positive since I chopped her...

I don't see her and I don't ever want to. This "family" tried to seduce your husband. Everything else could be excusable but that's a line family doesn't cross. Dictating...

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Telling lies about the history of your house to scare your siblings is sucky but again, that's life with siblings so whatever. Telling schoolmates about the time when you puked...

But helping yourself to someone else's spouse. .. *several* someone's spouses, in fact. .. at that point it becomes a clear pattern that this person is toxic and would just...

PotentialityKnocks − NTA. She needs to start small and show that she’s apologetic, has genuinely changed, and understand that even if she has, you still have the right to not...

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sucktitslickclits − NTA. If your parents keep pressing you to reconnect, I would remind them she tried sleeping with your husband. "Why would I want someone who tried braking up...

A few shared cautionary tales of aunts who weaponized access.

VixenNoire − NTA! !! My mother allowed her sister into our lives when I was born despite a lot of similar behavior to what you listed. Some of my earliest...

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That she had an affair with my father and that they had forced her to give me up for them to raise together. None of which was true of course,...

I could write a book on all the ways she tried to manipulate me and my brother against my mother. ..just because it was fun for her. Blood ties mean...

MultiFazed − NTA As a kid she used to tell me my bedroom was a place bad stuff happened in before we lived there, and would make up stories about...

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When I first started having periods they were really heavy and she told me that was a sign I was going to die which was why mom was taking me...

and even even said we had photos of it (which wasn't true). Sounds like a bunch of slightly-over-the-top sibling shenanigans that I assume she'll grow out of once you're both...

She [. ..] said she wants to be an aunt and know her niece. And I'm sure you want a sister who isn't a giant, human-shaped turd. But we can't...

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Practical advice rounded out the support, urging full no-contact protocols.

[Reddit User] − Nope. NTA Family that is BAD does not matter. Trust your instincts and make no apologies. Grey Rock your family on the subject.

Dracon_Pyrothayan − Funny, you being family didn't matter much when she tried to steal your husband. NTA

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Last_Fox_ − NTA you can’t trust this woman ,like you said she only comes back when she wants something ,if she keeps bothering you block her number and your parents...

The community’s verdict rang out like a gavel: NTA, with the attempted seduction of the poster’s husband serving as the non-negotiable dealbreaker. Childhood pranks might blur into memory, but a lifetime pattern of cruelty, control, and opportunism doesn’t evaporate with pregnancy announcements. Parents may cling to “family forever,” yet the poster’s refusal isn’t spite—it’s survival. Cutting contact isn’t burning bridges; it’s building a moat around a new life.

Would you risk your child’s emotional safety for the sake of blood ties? When does obligation end and self-preservation begin? Have you ever had to sever a toxic relative to protect your peace? Share your stories, boundaries, and hard-won lessons below—we’re listening.

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