AITA for telling my parents they can forget about me helping out with mom’s pregnancy or their “first child”?

A 16-year-old boy faces devastating rejection when his parents announce their excitement over a new pregnancy, openly treating the upcoming baby girl as their true “first child.” After years of emotional neglect, the teen refuses to step up and help, sparking outrage from his parents who claim he owes them for basic care.

What makes the story more complicated is the parents’ blunt admission that their son arrived at the “wrong time” and wasn’t truly wanted, while pouring love and resources into the new baby—revealing deep favoritism that has left the teen feeling invisible and alone in his own family.

‘AITA for telling my parents they can forget about me helping out with mom’s pregnancy or their “first child”?’

The teen grew up with distant parents who provided only the basics after losing the grandmother meant to raise him.

I’m 16M and will be 17 soon. My parents recently found out they’re expecting another baby. I say “another,” but to them this will be their first in every way...

They’ve never been very involved parents to me. They did the bare minimum, and I often felt like I wasn’t really seen as their responsibility. They had me when they...

Originally, I was supposed to be mostly raised by my paternal grandmother, but she suffered a massive stroke and later passed away when I was 7. After that, my parents...

Emotional support was absent, leaving the teen to fend for himself despite attempts to connect.

They rarely attended school meetings, didn’t sign school forms, and never followed up when teachers asked to speak with them about extra support I might need. I mostly learned to...

There was food in the house, and we lived together, but emotionally I’ve always felt very alone. It hurts, but I’ve gotten used to it. I’ve tried talking to them...

The new pregnancy brought joy for the parents—but demands and cruel words for their son.

When my mom found out she was pregnant, they were extremely excited. They told friends and talked about how this would be their “first baby” and everything they plan to...

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They already found out the baby is a girl, started buying things, and even opened a college fund for her. That’s something they never did for me. My mom has...

That’s when my parents started telling me I’d need to do more around the house and be available once the baby arrives. I told them they shouldn’t expect me to...

I said I was supposed to be their first child too. My mom told me I came at the wrong time and that this baby is one they really want,...

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They said I was being selfish and that I should be grateful they kept a roof over my head after my grandmother became ill. So… AITA?

This heartbreaking situation exposes profound parental neglect and favoritism, where a teenager is openly treated as an unwanted mistake while his parents eagerly prepare for a new baby. The core issue is the parents’ emotional abandonment of their son followed by demands for him to parent the new child they explicitly favor. Some might argue the teen should help with household chores out of family duty or gratitude for not being abandoned entirely.

However, the parents’ admission that he arrived at the “wrong time” and isn’t truly wanted justifies his refusal, as no child owes labor for basic legal obligations like shelter. What makes the story more complicated is the risk of escalating parentification, potentially forcing the teen into a caregiver role he never asked for.

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Broader societal views increasingly recognize emotional neglect as abuse, highlighting how unplanned children can face lifelong rejection while “do-over” babies receive full investment. This case reflects changing attitudes toward parental accountability—no one should be guilt-tripped for setting boundaries against those who failed them. The teen’s stance protects his well-being, affirming that love and support can’t be demanded after years of withholding it.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Most users strongly supported the teen, emphasizing that he owes nothing beyond basic respect and urging him to protect himself.

IrrelevantManatee − That's so messed up. I owe them because they made sure I wasn't homeless or in foster care after grandma got sick They are your parents. Taking care...

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You don't owe them s__t for doing the bare minimum they are required by law. NTA. Do you normal, basic chores, and DO NOT lift a single finger for this...

[Reddit User] − NTA if I were you I'd call CPS on my own parents. They're full of n__lect with their parenting with you. Which neglectful parenting is considered a...

It's better to be adopted or fostered by a family that cares than be living with them. And they're making you an extra parent.

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Tell their friends or an adult you trust that they aren't good parents and they never helped you (and you want to get out). Maybe tell your friends if they're...

Your life will get harder if you don't get out of there. At some point they might even ask you to drop out of school for their "first baby" 🙄....

Either way at some point you're going to need to get out of that house cause your situation sounds very similar to others that ended up not so well.

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And they were 25 when they had you? That isn't too early. That's the age where they should know better on how to take care of a kid or use...

They're just AH parents that wanted a girl 🙄. I'm sorry this is happening to you, but I hope everything goes well and something really good ends up happening to...

PetiteDreamerGirl − NTA, if you have any relatives, contact them or talk to your school counselor. What they said absolute horrendous. Being told your a mistake is horrible and sticks...

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Also you owe them for not making your homeless or putting you in foster care. No, you were their responsibility. You don’t owe them for keeping you off the streets...

they would have been arrested for parental abandonment. I’m so sorry. You have trash parents and you didn’t deserve that b__lshit

atealein − NTA. Your parents are toxic. I hope you can get yourself emancipated and find some sort of job/income to get out of that place. I am so sorry...

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TheProfWife − If you can, file for emancipation and call, CPS. If you want someone to talk to, my DM’s are open.

My husband works in academia, so we could probably help you identify some scholarships or other programs for continuing education after high school.

NTA You are not the a__hole at all in this situation but unfortunately, there are some very adult decisions that have to be made. I am so sorry that you...

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I sincerely hope that your future is filled with chosen family and a life of peace. Reddit has a sub for narcissistic parents that might be a good resource for...

A few users focused on practical steps and emotional validation without demanding help for the baby.

at0micflutterby − NTA! Are they calling this their first baby? That's sooooo soooo deeply insulting. I'm very sorry you're dealing with this.

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seregil42 − "Your kid, your responsibility. Don't f__k this one up too. " That's all you need to say. Plan to move out of that situation as soon as possible....

Others expressed shock and sympathy to underscore the parents’ cruelty.

He_Who_Is_Person − NTA G__damn, man, I'm sorry. They sound cartoonishly evil.

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Far_Dependent_8975 − NTA I don't even have any good advice to give you, I'm sorry. Your best shoot would be to get out of here as quickly as possible,

but do you have any idea what you'll do after school ? Isn't there a professional at your school that could help you see your options ?

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GothPenguin − You owe them exactly what they’ve given you-absolutely nothing. NTA

Ultimately, the teenager’s refusal to help with his parents’ favored new baby stems from years of neglect and painful rejection, marking a clear boundary in a deeply unequal family dynamic. While the parents demand gratitude for the bare minimum, the teen prioritizes his own emotional survival.

How would you handle being told you were a “mistake” while your sibling is celebrated—would you cut contact as soon as possible, or try one last conversation? Have you experienced parental favoritism toward a younger sibling, and what helped you cope or move forward?

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