AITA for telling my husband that I dont want to be a single mom of three kids?

Imagine being caught between your love for children and the overwhelming weight of responsibilities that never seem to be shared. Our Redditor, a 31-year-old mother married for 12 years, has always dreamed of a big family.

Yet after 12 years of marriage, two children, and countless sleepless nights handling every aspect of parenting alone, the thought of having a third child fills her with dread. Despite the few recent improvements in her husband’s listening skills when it comes to family matters, his latest insistence on expanding their family struck a nerve.

Feeling unsupported and emotionally exhausted, she finally snapped during one of his monologues about how wonderful it would be to have another baby. With a heavy heart, she declared she never wanted to be a single mom of three—because, frankly, she’s already carrying most of the weight. Is she justified in drawing this hard boundary, or is she overreacting? Let’s explore her story.

‘AITA for telling my husband that I dont want to be a single mom of three kids?’

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

When a partner’s lack of support meets the intense reality of single-handed parenting, setting boundaries becomes essential. Dr. Susan Heitler, a clinical psychologist who specializes in relationship dynamics, states, “It’s crucial for individuals to assert their limits when their needs consistently go unmet. A one-sided division of labor in parenting can lead to deep emotional and physical exhaustion.”

In our Redditor’s case, her husband’s repeated dismissal of her struggles and his persistent advocacy for a third child signal a serious imbalance in their relationship. Family therapists note that while every couple experiences disagreements about family planning, the decision to have another child should be a mutual one—especially when one partner already feels overwhelmed by current responsibilities.

Research published on Psychology Today underscores that long-term stress from unshared responsibilities not only harms personal well-being but can also weaken the marital bond. Our Redditor has clearly been carrying the bulk of the load—from late-night feedings to daily household tasks—while her husband’s involvement remains minimal. Experts argue that without equitable support, any additional child could exacerbate her stress and lead to resentment that further damages the relationship.

Moreover, communication experts emphasize that when one partner repeatedly ignores the emotional and physical toll of parenting, it’s not only a signal of neglect but a call for a serious reevaluation of priorities. Dr. Heitler adds, “It’s not about being ungrateful or unloving; it’s about preserving one’s mental and physical health in the face of overwhelming responsibilities.” In this context, her decision to declare, “I don’t want to be a single mom of three,” is a defensive yet necessary boundary, reflecting a forward-thinking approach to safeguarding her future and that of her existing children.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Many Redditors echoed her sentiments with comments like, “NTA—you deserve better than to be left carrying the weight alone,” and “If he thinks an apology is enough, he clearly doesn’t understand what real partnership means.”

Others emphasized that the burden of parenting shouldn’t fall entirely on one person, with one user remarking, “Your health and happiness matter—if he can’t step up, then no more children is a reasonable choice.” The overall consensus is that her feelings are valid, and her demand for equitable support is entirely justified.

Ultimately, this isn’t just about having another baby—it’s about preserving your well-being and maintaining a healthy balance in your marriage. Our Redditor’s decision to firmly state that she doesn’t want to be a single mom of three reflects a necessary boundary when one partner’s support is lacking.

While some may argue that every couple faces tough times, the consensus here is clear: without true partnership, adding another child is simply too high a cost. What would you do if you were faced with similar overwhelming responsibilities? Share your thoughts and join the discussion below!