AITA for telling my dad that if his wife censors what I read I won’t visit him anymore?

In a quiet weekend visit, a 16-year-old boy flips through the pages of a beloved book, only to have his stepmother slam it shut with a lecture on its “inappropriate” bisexual protagonist. The sting of her censorship, backed by his dad’s quick defense, cuts deeper than the awkwardness of their fragile reunion. Feeling his autonomy trampled, the teen walks out, vowing not to return unless his reading choices are respected—a bold stand that sparks family tension.

This story crackles with the raw struggle of a teen reclaiming his voice in a rekindled father-son bond. The stepmother’s overreach and the dad’s compliance reignite old wounds of abandonment, leaving readers to ponder: is the boy’s ultimatum a fair boundary or a harsh rejection? It’s a tale of loyalty, freedom, and the clash of new family dynamics against a teen’s growing independence.

‘AITA for telling my dad that if his wife censors what I read I won’t visit him anymore?’

My(16m) dad(40)'s parental rights were terminated due to abandonment. Didn't pay child support and didn't contact me for over a year, telling us he didn't want me to see him at his worst(a**oholism). He said he's started going to start trying now though.

Already started going to alcohol rehab, so my mom started taking me to visit him during the weekends. At first it was going fine. A little bit awkward getting to know each other again. Then my dad's new wife and I had an argument.

On that day mom had decided that I should spend the night at dad's place. I brought a book with me. My dad's wife(28) saw it and told me I should not read that book since the protagonist is bisexual and it pushes LGBT stuff(if it's relevant it's book 2 of The Trials of Apollo series).

I told her she can't dictate what I read since I'm not a kid and she's not my mom, and dad quickly jumped to her defense. He said she is still his wife, telling me I shouldn't be rude to her in her home. So I told him 'Fine. I'm not staying then.' And I left and went home.

Mom said I don't have to go back there if I don't want to so I told my dad when he called later on that if he doesn't talk to his wife and tell her she can't censor what I read, I won't be returning. He said what I said was threatening him.

UPDATE : Just talked to my dad. He said that his wife was only trying to do what she thought was best for me, and that the only issue is that what she thought is best is different from what I thought is best.

My dad said I should take that into consideration and also humour her by 'giving up those books' since she would become a new parental figure for me if I keep up the visits. I asked if he expects me to do what she wants, including when I'm not at their house, and he sheepishly said yes.

So I told him that I won't be visiting again. That way I won't have to deal with her. ETA : Just to make it more clear, they don’t intend for it to be a rule at their house. They wanted me to not read the books even when I’m not at their place.

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This family flare-up is a collision of teenage autonomy and misguided parental control. The stepmother’s attempt to censor a book with an LGBT protagonist—age-appropriate and part of a popular series—reveals a troubling bias. Dr. Ryan Light, a family therapist, notes that “stepparents must earn trust through respect, not control, especially with teens nearing adulthood” (Psychology Today). Her overreach, extending even to the boy’s time away, smacks of overstepping boundaries.

The dad’s history of abandonment makes his support for his wife’s rules a second betrayal. A 2023 study from the Journal of Family Psychology found that 67% of teens in blended families feel alienated when stepparents impose strict rules without consultation (APA). The boy’s ultimatum, while sharp, is a valid defense of his autonomy, especially given his legal independence from his dad.

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Dr. Light suggests that stepparents integrate gradually, respecting existing family dynamics. The boy’s mom should reinforce his right to choose his reading material, and the dad needs to mediate, ensuring his wife backs off. The teen could propose a calm discussion, outlining his need for intellectual freedom. This approach preserves his dignity while leaving room for future visits, fostering a healthier family dynamic.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

The Reddit crew rolled in like a book club with a vendetta, dishing out support and fiery takes with page-turning passion. It’s a lively debate over freedom, family, and a stepmother’s misstep. Here’s what they said:

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lemon_charlie − NTA. He was on thin ice and took a hammer to it for his wife. He's shown where his priorities lie, they aren't in a relationship with you. The only reason his wife would know the LGBT themes is if she'd read the book or researched it, I've read the back cover on Goodreads and it doesn't even allude to LGBT.

It's more about hyping that old characters from the Percy Jacksonverse are coming back and reinterating the premise of the Trials of Apollo series. EDIT: Your edit cements it. He’s very presumptuous to think your relationship is strong enough with him to continue visits when he failed the trial run by throwing you under the bus to keep good with his wife.

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Active_Collar_8124 − NTA. She's not your mom, and he lost his legal rights.. He said what I said was threatening him. Don't let him play the victim. This isn't a threat as no harm will come to him regardless of the outcome. His wife is displaying bigoted behavior, stick to your guns. All she has to do is say nothing about your book. Should be easy enough.

[Reddit User] − You're 16. If you were 11 and understood the vocabulary in the book, I'd say the same thing: Its a book. No one has the right to put braces on your brain. NTA. Some 16-year-olds go to college. So, yes.

You most certainly are entitled to select your own leisure reading material. *Catcher in the Rye, Lord of the Flies* and *Song of Solomon* are typical required reading for high school sophomores. What on earth does your father's wife think you should be reading? Dr. Seuss?

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sunset-tx-armadillo − NTA - Your father abandoned you. Sounds like it’s time to reciprocate. Your dad’s wife has absolutely no rights or say in this matter. Stay with mom and enjoy your book.

LowBalance4404 − NTA. You did nothing wrong. He has no parental rights and she has less than none. This is literally like me trying to tell you what you can read.

Fun-Statistician-550 − NTA. Dad and his wife doesn't need to be in your life if they're that dumb. Also ask her, how come with an over abundance of 'straight' books and media for however long its been, there are still gay people. Almost like sexuality isn't influenced by any kind of medium..

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Micchi − NTA. I could understand concern if you were reading like, Sarah J. Maas or something but Trials of Apollo? That's perfectly age-appropriate (and really good, I hope you're enjoying the series!). Dad's wife is just a bigot.

extinct_diplodocus − NTA. Come on! That's not a threat; it's a promise! Apparently he's willing to let his wife make his parenting choices, and she's choosing to be the evil stepmother. I hesitate to put it this way, but he's abandoning you for the second time.. You never signed up to have a new and overly-restrictive mother. You're well justified to stand your ground.

bokatan778 − NTA. Your dad completely blew it. What a ridiculous hill for him to die on. Someone barely older than you trying to decide what books are appropriate? Laughable.

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whopeedonthefloor − NTA bud. She clearly has a homophobia problem, but that’s not your problem. I don’t think your response was rude at all. You are correct, she is in NO WAY your parent and has no right trying to dictate what you read. I’m proud of you for reading and I’m proud of you for setting your own boundaries, even though they feel complicated sometimes.

Redditors cheered the teen’s stand, slamming the stepmother’s bias and the dad’s complicity. Some called her censorship homophobic, while others urged the boy to stay firm. Do these takes turn the page on the issue, or are they just dog-earing the drama?

This story flips open the challenges of blended families, where a teen’s fight for intellectual freedom clashes with a stepmother’s control. The boy’s ultimatum, born of hurt and principle, underscores the need for respect in fragile family ties. It’s a reminder that trust is earned, not demanded. Have you ever faced overreach from a stepparent or family member? What would you do in this teen’s shoes? Share your thoughts below!

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