AITA for telling my boyfriend’s mother why we’re no longer living together?

Picture this: a cozy evening shattered by a phone call that spirals into family chaos. When a young woman answered a call from her boyfriend’s mother, she didn’t expect to unravel a secret that would set tongues wagging and Facebook prayers flowing. Her boyfriend’s betrayal—kissing another woman at a club—had already pushed him to crash on a friend’s couch. But when his mom asked why he wasn’t home, the truth spilled out, sparking drama that’s both juicy and relatable.

The story captures the sting of infidelity and the awkward dance of family ties. With humor bubbling through the absurdity of public prayer posts, it’s a tale that hooks you with its raw emotion. Readers can’t help but wonder: was she wrong to spill the beans, or was honesty the only path?

‘AITA for telling my boyfriend’s mother why we’re no longer living together?’

So my boyfriend is a bartender at this club and one night he made out with this girl and almost went home with her. To his credit, he did tell me as soon as it happened and really feels bad about it. Needless to say we've sort of reset things and he's been staying with a friend for the past month or so.

It seems he didn't tell anyone in his family that he wasn't staying at the house anymore because his mother (we're really close) called to check up on me and afterwards wanted to talk to my boyfriend. I told her he's not here because we were no longer living together and she blew up questions which I answered truthfully because why not?

Now my boyfriend just called me and said his family has been lecturing him the whole day over this and posted it on Facebook asking for prayers for him (i couldn't stop laughing at this). He said he wasn't angry at me but also used that smiling emoji which he only uses when he's upset. Was I wrong to say something?

Trust in relationships can feel like walking a tightrope, especially when betrayal shakes the foundation. This story highlights the ripple effects of infidelity, not just between partners but within families. According to Dr. Shirley Glass, a renowned psychologist, “Secrecy is the enemy of intimacy” . The boyfriend’s failure to disclose his actions to his family created a vacuum that the OP filled with truth, albeit unexpectedly.

The OP faces a classic dilemma: protect a partner’s privacy or honor a close relationship with his mother. Her honesty aligns with the 78% of Americans who value truthfulness in family communication, per a 2023 Pew Research study . Yet, the boyfriend’s upset suggests a breach of unspoken loyalty, a tension many navigate in relationships.

Dr. Glass notes that rebuilding trust requires transparency and accountability. The boyfriend’s remorse is a start, but his family’s public reaction complicates healing. For the OP, maintaining open dialogue with him could clarify boundaries and expectations moving forward.

To mend this, the couple might benefit from setting clear communication rules, as suggested by family therapist Esther Perel . The OP should continue her mature approach, fostering honesty while respecting sensitive family dynamics.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

The Reddit crew didn’t hold back, serving up a spicy mix of support and snark. From calling out the boyfriend’s “stupid prizes” to praising the mom’s no-nonsense stance, the comments are a wild ride. Here’s the raw scoop from the crowd:

JackNotName − NTA. Did you lie? No.. He is a victim of his own actions. Both cheating and then not being honest with his family.

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DrSaks − NTA. You actually seem to be taking it quite well! You answered the phone, and spoke to your BFs mum honestly.

GarlicButterGarnet − NTA he can’t expect you to keep a secret that you didn’t know was a secret. I get that you could have told her to ask him, but it’s hard for people to go into damage control mode in the moment. Did you know his family was going to react like that? Because if that’s the case, I can see why he wouldn’t tell them ANYTHING

GonnaBeIToldUSo − NTA. You told the truth. Your boyfriend did something pretty crappy and you are actually taking it in a very mature fashion.

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anavocado_thanks − NTA! Why should the person being cheated on always be expected to hide the cheater's actions? They should learn to deal with the consequences of their actions

RedBullMetal − NTA..... You were caught off-guard. Since he didn't tell them that he was moving out, it opened up a can of worms once his mother found out from you. Is your boyfriend pissed? Yes, he is.... but he also knows that his s**ew-up caused him to have to move out and any further actions by him could lead to you totally dumping him. I hope that you both can mend things.

[Reddit User] − NTA. 'Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.' The prizes are the prayers.

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Wyrd_byrd − NTA I would've laughed too. You reap what you sow. Glad his family isn't letting him get away with cheating.

dontincludeme − NTA. When I found out my ex, who I lived with, had been cheating on me for the last seven months of our 2.5 year relationship, I told everyone. Including his mom, who had no idea. And I would do it again. Why should cheaters get away with it

TaraBells − NTA. And can we give a shout out to the Mom who didn’t immediately jump to defend her baby boy, blame OP, or try to excuse his behavior. I mean, she thinks the devil got him, but she knows he effed up. We need more mom like this!

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These Redditors rallied behind the OP, cheering her honesty while chuckling at the family’s prayer drama. Some saw the boyfriend’s secrecy as a red flag; others admired the OP’s calm handling. But do these hot takes capture the full story, or are they just adding fuel to the fire?

This story is a rollercoaster of betrayal, truth, and family antics, leaving us pondering the cost of honesty. The OP’s choice to speak up stirred the pot, but it also shone a light on the importance of trust. As the couple navigates this mess, their journey reminds us how fragile relationships can be. What would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation? Share your thoughts and experiences below—let’s keep the conversation going!

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