AITA for telling my boyfriend ex wife I won’t babysit her child?
A 27-year-old woman and her boyfriend (co-parents to his 9-year-old daughter) got blindsided when his ex-wife—freshly married to the 19-year-old she cheated with—asked her to babysit their newborn for a full anniversary week. The ex bypassed the dad (who already said no) and went straight to the girlfriend, then exploded with insults when turned down.
What makes the story more complicated is the grandparents’ guilt-trip: “Do it for the sisters to bond!” The girlfriend loves her stepdaughter but draws the line at free labor for an affair baby she’s never met.
‘AITA for telling my boyfriend ex wife I won’t babysit her child?’
The ex-wife’s first-ever direct message skipped pleasantries and went straight to logistics.
The request unraveled fast—along with the ex’s temper.
Babysitting a stranger’s infant for seven days isn’t “helping family”—it’s unpaid labor for a vacation the ex chose over parenting. The ex bypassed the child’s father (the legal co-parent) and went to the girlfriend, revealing she wanted a doormat, not a discussion.
Grandparents’ “sibling bonding” pitch ignores logistics: two kids, one week, zero prior relationship. Family therapist Dr. Laura Markham, in a 2025 Parents column on blended boundaries, warns: “Guilt-tripping adults into free childcare teaches kids that love is transactional. Refusal isn’t punishment—it’s self-respect.”
The ex’s rage at a polite “no” confirms the real motive: entitlement. A simple “We’re not available” would’ve sufficed; insults proved the favor was never mutual.
Here’s what Redditors had to say:
Users slammed the ex’s audacity and backed the couple’s hard pass.
Sharp clapbacks kept the mood savage.
![[Reddit User] − NTA, she wants her cake and eat it too. Id ask her if they are going to a beach, there should be some sand there she can...](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/11/wp-editor-1762503788600-1.webp)
Some comments with different opinions come from the user community
![[Reddit User] − NTA. My exe and her new husband pulled the same thing on me. Not gonna play that game and I don't recommend anyone else do it either.](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/11/wp-editor-1762503809395-1.webp)
The girlfriend didn’t punish a baby—she rejected a week-long resort subsidy for cheaters. Grandparents want bonding? They can host. Community verdict: NTA, and the ex’s tantrum sealed it.When exes demand favors years later, is “no” ever too harsh? Would you let grandparents babysit both kids—or book your own vacation instead?
