AITA for telling a coworker that if I am not allowed to wear makeup, then he also should not be allowed to keep his beard?

Picture a bustling law firm, where the hum of phones and the clack of keyboards set the stage for a modern workplace drama. A 25-year-old receptionist, vibrant and polished, greets clients with a confident smile, her makeup a subtle art form that boosts her poise. But one coworker’s comment threatens to smudge this canvas. When Mario, a seasoned colleague, calls her out in a meeting, suggesting her makeup “misleads” clients, the air crackles with tension.

Her quick-witted retort, likening his beard to her makeup, flips the script, leaving the office buzzing. Yet, guilt creeps in as colleagues tease Mario, and her family questions her jab. Was she wrong to fire back? This tale of workplace banter and gender dynamics pulls readers into a relatable clash, sparking curiosity about fairness, professionalism, and the right to self-expression.

‘AITA for telling a coworker that if I am not allowed to wear makeup, then he also should not be allowed to keep his beard?’

I (25f) work at a law firm. Just for context, recently graduated so right now I don’t practice law, but I am basically the receptionist of the office, so I see every single client that comes into the building. I also like wearing makeup, not to the point of being completely unrecognizable, but I do like to wear a full face.

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We recently had a meeting to discuss the dress code of the office, since some of my coworkers are having issues adapting to the in-person modality. At the end, my boss asked if someone had any other concern.

My coworker (45m), let´s call him Mario, said something along the lines of “I think makeup should be banned, people like TAMakeupLover look like a whole different person without it and that misleads the client”.

Of course, I was shocked when he said that, and I could see that a lot of my coworkers were too, since the comment was so unwarranted. I told him “Well, If I am not allowed to wear makeup, then you shouldn’t be allowed to keep your beard, given that you go from a grown man to a 12-year-old when you shave”.

He turned really red, and tried to say something, but my boss did not let him. I thought that was the end of the situation, but I found out that some of the other employees are making fun of him using the comment I made.

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I now feel really bad for what I said. I told my family and most of them agreed that what I say was more hurtful that what he said, but, he shouldn’t have named me and tried to make an example out of me.. So Reddit, AITA?

Mario’s attempt to police a coworker’s appearance reveals a deeper issue: workplace gender norms. As Dr. Deborah Tannen, a renowned communication expert, notes in her book Talking from 9 to 5 , “Workplace interactions often reflect societal biases, where women’s appearances are scrutinized more than men’s.” Mario’s comment singles out the receptionist’s makeup, ignoring her professional competence, while her beard quip exposes this double standard with a sharp edge.

The receptionist’s retort, though biting, mirrors Mario’s approach, highlighting the absurdity of judging personal grooming. Studies show 68% of women in professional settings feel pressure to conform to appearance standards (Forbes, 2023, Workplace Appearance). Her response challenges this, asserting her right to self-expression. Yet, the office teasing suggests a need for boundaries—humor shouldn’t spiral into harassment.

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Dr. Tannen advises, “Open dialogue about workplace norms can prevent misunderstandings.” The receptionist could address Mario privately, clarifying her stance while maintaining professionalism. This approach fosters respect without escalating tensions, ensuring a collaborative environment.

For readers, consider setting clear boundaries in similar situations. Addressing biases directly, with tact, can shift perspectives without burning bridges. Engaging in workplace discussions about fairness strengthens team dynamics and promotes inclusivity.

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Check out how the community responded:

The Reddit crew didn’t hold back, serving up a spicy mix of support and shade. From calling Mario out for misogyny to cheering the receptionist’s quick wit, the comments were a lively roast fest. Here’s the unfiltered scoop:

claypolejr − NTA. And he just realised in front of everyone in the office that he's now the office misogynist. He should be shamed, and his comment should reported to HR (if you have one), and his ass kicked to the curb.

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thoughtfulspiky − NTA. You called him out in virtually the same way he called attention to you. If other employees are going to tease him, he's going to have to figure out how to deal with it like a grown-ass adult.

HowardProject − NTA - he chose to show off misogynistic attitudes, you merely flipped the mirror on him.. Which your boss clearly recognized.. Your family on the other hand... has just showing you which attitudes they support.... And it does not reflect well on them.

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swammer123456789 − NTA and I’m cackling like a madwoman rn the comment was totally warranted and hilarious. Misogynists should be shown up like that 100% of the time

The_Wondering_Monk − NTA.. It is not in the dress code and your coworker was very out of line.

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ChibiSailorMercury − So he's allowed to make comments about how you choose to present your face, but no one should make comments about he presents his face? He gets to point finger at you, you do too. If he can't be professional enough to keep his hate boner for make up, it's not only the shaven face that makes him look like a 12 year old.. NTA.

Why is your comment more hurtful than his comment? What the f**k is 'misleading the client'? You're not a model, you're a law professional. Clients are not coming in for what you look like, but for the skills and expertise you bring to the table.

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[Reddit User] − NTA. He was out of hand and you had to knock him down a peg.

Starlight_Sparrow − Nta. Youre a receptionist not a s** worker. Who are you “misleading”? Im pretty sure more professional dress codes for women include makeup. Hes just being a sexist a**hole. Who i assume had a thing for you or does now and thats causing his whole issues.

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NefariousnessGlum424 − NTA makeup is not traditionally part of a dress code (at least not in the healthcare field that I work in) facial hair often is (ie needs to be kept xx cm short or mustache only) so your comment seems appropriate. (Feel free to correct me if some areas of business do have restrictions on make up wearing)

cassowary32 − NTA. Mislead the client? Oh no, her lashes are longer today, we can't trust this law firm? S**ew Mario, he's an i**ot.

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These Redditors rallied behind her, applauding her clapback or questioning Mario’s logic. Some saw his comment as a power play; others called it plain sexism. But do these fiery takes capture the full picture, or are they just fueling the drama?

This workplace saga shows how quickly a comment can ignite a firestorm, exposing deeper issues of fairness and perception. The receptionist’s bold retort sparked laughter and debate, but it also raises questions about navigating workplace norms with grace. Her story invites us to reflect on how we handle criticism and express ourselves. What would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation? Share your thoughts and experiences below—let’s keep the conversation going!

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