AITA for taking $15,000 out of my daughters college fund to buy myself a new car?

Shirley Stafford Hours
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Picture a gleaming vintage Mustang, its curves catching the light at a high-end dealership, tempting a man whose old car just gave out. For this father, the thrill of a dream ride overshadowed a sacred promise a college fund set aside for his 8-year-old daughter, shared with his ex-wife. What seemed like a quick dip into savings turned into a full-throttle mistake, as he withdrew $15,000 without a word to his co-contributor.

The fallout was swift and fierce. His ex-wife, who pours more into the fund, erupted, threatening legal action and branding him irresponsible. As accusations fly and guilt creeps in, this Reddit tale revs up a drama of family trust, financial ethics, and the cost of chasing a shiny impulse.

‘AITA for taking $15,000 out of my daughters college fund to buy myself a new car?’

I have an 8 year old daughter, and to make college more easily accessible for her, my ex wife and I each put money into a shared fund for her. My ex wife and I do not get along, but we make an effort for the sake of our daughter. At the end of last year, my car basically blew up.

Completely blew a gasket, broke down every time I drove it and ended up being written off. My current wife and I decided to save for a new car, and to wait for one I was sure I wanted as I loved my old car. On my way home from work I drive past a really high end car dealership, basically sells vintage top class cars.

They’re absolutely beautiful but I’ve never went in because they’re extremely expensive. A few days ago I drove past it and thought why not, I’ll have a look and just not buy anything. I walked in and saw a truly beautiful Mustang, rang my wife and told her I’d found the car I wanted.

We hadn’t saved enough so I used the money from our savings, and without thinking dipped into the college fund my ex wife and I have for our daughter. It was just under $15,000. I rang my ex wife after I’d bought it to tell her, and assured her I’d put the money back in

but she went ballistic telling me that she’d basically just paid for my car as she puts more money in monthly than I do. I said that was ridiculous and that it doesn’t matter because it’s my money too. She’s now going on about suing me and all sorts which is just ridiculous. AITA?

This high-octane saga screeches to a halt at the intersection of trust and responsibility. The OP’s impulsive withdrawal of $15,000 from his daughter’s college fund for a luxury car, without consulting his ex-wife, breached a shared agreement. His promise to replace the money does little to soothe the sting of betrayal, especially since his ex contributes more to the fund.

Financial planner Suze Orman stresses, “Money set aside for a child’s future is untouchable—breaking that trust risks more than finances”. The choice of a vintage Mustang over a practical car amplifies the issue luxury vehicle sales rose 12% in 2024, per Kelley Blue Book, often driven by emotional purchases.

The OP’s failure to prioritize his daughter’s future over his desires paints him as reckless, straining co-parenting trust. His ex-wife’s anger is less about the car and more about broken faith.

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To mend this, the OP must repay the $15,000 promptly, ideally with a clear timeline shared with his ex-wife. A formal agreement restricting fund access could prevent future missteps. Open communication and a budget for a more modest car could rebuild trust. This tale reminds us to weigh long-term promises against short-term thrills.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Reddit slammed the OP as selfish, unanimously labeling him the asshole for using his daughter’s college fund for a luxury car. They criticized his impulsive purchase, arguing that a child’s future trumps personal desires, and questioned his ability to repay the $15,000 quickly, given his reliance on the fund.

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Commenters backed the ex-wife’s fury, noting her larger contributions and the breach of trust. Some highlighted the legal risks, as divorce agreements often protect such funds, and urged the OP to face consequences. The consensus: prioritizing a flashy Mustang over his daughter’s education was indefensible.

Alternative_Answer − YTA. You stole from both your wife and your daughter to irresponsibly buy a car you can't afford.. I hope this is a troll, no one can be this dense.

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WolfGoddess77 − YTA!!! You could have bought a car that was more than enough for your needs for a much, MUCH lower price. You took that money and spent it on a vanity, not a necessity.

TrippleColore − I hope she sues you, dude.. YTA Your daughter's future comes before any car, period. But you just squandered that for a car you HAD to have. Doesn't sound like you are going to be able to put that money back all that fast either, since this was the money two people put in over 8 years. Also, you daughter WILL hear about what you did. So have fun trying to save that relationship in the future.

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[Reddit User] − YTA. A normal car, sure. A mustang? With your daughter's money? On impulse?

PhantomNiffler − YTA 100%. That money is not yours. Your ex is now wondering how often you're going to 'dip into it' for luxuries. You're very irresponsible and I hope you're a troll.

Tuxmando − YTA. This wasn’t your money. It was joint money with an agreement of how it is to be spent. You are either really stupid, really lack accountability, or are trolling. Shared money in a divorce? Bad thinking. What does the Divorce Settlement say about this money?

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Divorce Settlements are basically court orders. If you broke an agreement in there, you aren’t just pissing off your ex. You are breaking the law and pissing off a judge. Your ex can let the judge know you broke the agreement.. LPT: Never p**s off people who can make a warrant for your arrest.

sdfre2580 − YTA. she’s your EX WIFE, not your WIFE, her money isn’t your money. that was set aside for your daughter. huge AH move. you better return every single penny.

[Reddit User] − Yta- I hope she does sue, and I hope she makes you give cash monthly for the college fund with no access to the account at all. Why would you spend your child SCHOOL FUNDS. On some expensive car you wanted .

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SwiggyBloodlust − “it’s my money too” *It was never your money.* If you had figured out to the penny how much you’d put in and withdrew only that? You’d still be the a**hole. And instead of a new-to-you cheaper car you just had to have a fancy one? YTA. I see why she divorced you.

Advanced-Lobsterr − YTA You have stolen money from your ex-wife and your daughter. Of course she is going to sue you and she´s going to win.

This tale of a gleaming car and a shattered trust burns rubber through family loyalty. Reddit’s verdict is harsh but clear putting a child’s future on the line for a luxury ride is a reckless detour. Have you ever faced a tough choice between a personal want and a family duty? Share your stories how do you balance dreams with responsibilities?

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