AITA for spending my money on voting tickets instead of helping my boyfriend with his child support?

Jonathan Hours
Comments 0 Comments

Imagine being so obsessed with your favorite K-pop star that you drop a small fortune on voting tickets to ensure his crown in a popularity poll. Now picture your boyfriend, already in debt to you, begging for cash to cover his child support—only to find out you chose fandom over his financial woes. That’s the sticky situation one woman found herself in, sparking a fiery fallout complete with Facebook shaming and friend pile-ons.

This Reddit drama isn’t just about money—it’s about boundaries, priorities, and the clash of personal passions with relationship expectations. Let’s dive into her story, get an expert’s take, and see how Reddit weighs in on this wallet-wrenching debate.

‘AITA for spending my money on voting tickets instead of helping my boyfriend with his child support?’

A fan’s devotion to her idol collided with her boyfriend’s financial struggles, leading to a public spat. Here’s the full story from the Reddit post:

Hi, I am a 29 year old female. My boyfriend 33M, let's call him Chris, had asked me to give him 10 000 pesos (199 USD) because he's fallen short on his child support. This is not the first time it happened. 2 months ago I loaned him 15k that he hasn't paid yet. I told him I can't give the entire amount but I have 3k spare money.

He thanked me for my help and promised to pay me back once he gets his finances sorted. Today Chris found out from a friend that I spent more than 15k on voting tickets for a popularity poll. I am a diehard fan of this Korean Actor and I really wanted him to win the award. So I bought tickets, made multiple accounts and encouraged fellow fans to vote.

Chris messaged me, expressing his disappointment. He said he never expected me to be a shallow person who would spend so much money on someone who doesn't even know me. Chris shared this to our friends in Facebook chat and they all sided with him.. So, AITA? Was it wrong to spend money on someone I admire?

This voting ticket tussle reveals a deeper rift over financial boundaries in relationships. The woman’s choice to spend on her passion rather than bail out her boyfriend’s child support is her right, but his public shaming suggests a lack of mutual respect.

Relationship expert Dr. Terri Orbuch notes, “Financial disagreements often stem from mismatched values and poor communication.” The boyfriend’s reliance on loans, without repayment, signals dependency, while his criticism of her spending ignores her autonomy. A 2024 study in Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that 58% of couples cite financial control as a source of conflict.

ADVERTISEMENT

The boyfriend’s public airing of grievances escalates the issue. Dr. Orbuch suggests couples set clear financial boundaries, like agreeing on loan terms upfront. The woman could firmly state she won’t lend more until repaid, while discussing how they handle shared responsibilities.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Reddit’s got a full fan club of opinions on this financial face-off—here’s the hot gossip:

ADVERTISEMENT

NumerousPresent478 − NTA. It’s your money. They’re his kids. The fact that he’s trying to publicly shame you on group chat? 🚩🚩🚩

fuzzyfuzzyfungus − NTA. I can't personally understand spending money on an actor; but it's hard to imagine any spending so frivolous that a p**asitic deadbeat leeching off you because he can't or won't cover his own child support obligations. He's already 15k in the hole and he's on you because you did something other than allow him to go 25k into the hole? That's just pathetic.

teresajs − NTA. While I personally think you spent your money foolishly on those tickets, it's your money to spend however you want. That said, you shouldn't give your BF any more money until he has repaid all of the money you've previously given him.

ADVERTISEMENT

You live separately and don't share expenses. His child support is for him to pay. And it would be unwise to get to committed to a guy who can't/won't pay his own child support. Basically, him asking for so much money multiple times and not making any effort to make even a small repayment is a red flag. So, stop giving him any money.

HappyElephant82 − NTA. What kind of loser asks money from his girlfriend for his child support? One that's using her, that's who. His friends are fucked up expecting you to pay for his child support. Your money belongs to you, and if you want to spend it on voting tickets or on hookers and blow, it's your business. Get rid of him. He's not looking to pay you back, he's looking to bleed you dry.

personreddits − NTA but what a stupid thing to spend money on.

ADVERTISEMENT

Evil_Mel − NTA. It's your money to spend how you wish. If you wanted to throw it in a river, you could. His financial issues are not your problem. Why is he short on child support? What did he buy that caused this?

pineconeharvest − NTA, pretty rich for a guy who can't pay his own child support to criticize someone else's financial choices.

[Reddit User] − NTA but you must be very firm with this: you will never ever loan him money again for child support. Period. End of discussion.

ADVERTISEMENT

Squinky75 − NTA. You are not responsible for his child care payments. I would not encourage him to make a habit of 'borrowing' from you. You can do whatever you want with your own money.

DismalDally − I mean it’s your money, and I’m not advocating you use it to spend it on your boyfriends kids, but dear lord - please reconsider spending your hard earned money making someone already rich and famous win a popularity contest.

These takes swing from cheering her financial freedom to questioning her priorities. Can this couple find harmony, or is it time to change the tune?

ADVERTISEMENT

This saga of K-pop votes versus child support shows how fast money matters can sour a romance. The woman’s not wrong to spend her cash as she pleases, but her boyfriend’s public jab and unpaid debts hint at bigger issues. A candid talk about boundaries might just save the day. Have you ever clashed with a partner over spending choices? What would you do in her shoes? Drop your thoughts below!

Share this post
ADVERTISEMENT

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *