AITA for setting a 11pm curfew on my husband?

In the haze of sleepless nights and diaper changes, a new mother, balancing college and a four-month-old, pleads for her husband’s help with a simple request: be home by 11pm on weekends to share the load. Instead, he stumbles in at 2am, beers in hand, mocking her “curfew” to his buddies and branding her a controlling nag. Her quiet hope for partnership crumbles into hurt and frustration.

This Reddit saga, raw with the weight of new parenthood, captures the sting of unequal burdens in a marriage. The mother’s curfew, born of desperation for a shower or an hour to study, clashes with her husband’s carefree weekends, raising questions about fairness and respect. Was her request too much, or is his neglect the real issue? Let’s dive into this heart-wrenching domestic drama.

‘AITA for setting a 11pm curfew on my husband?’

This curfew clash lays bare the strain of unequal parenting. The mother’s 11pm request, far from controlling, was a cry for partnership as she balances college and near-solo childcare. Her husband’s refusal, paired with mocking her to others, signals a deeper disregard for her needs, verging on emotional neglect.

Parenting equity is critical. A 2023 study from the American Sociological Association found that 70% of new mothers report doing the majority of childcare, often leading to burnout and resentment. The husband’s claim that his job excuses him ignores her full-time load as a student and mother.

Dr. John Gottman, a relationship expert, notes, “Mutual support in parenting strengthens marriages; neglect breeds disconnection”. Here, the husband’s late nights and name-calling undermine trust, while the mother’s calm requests show restraint. His recent efforts—breakfast, baby duty—are promising, but sustained change is key.

This story reflects broader issues of gender roles and communication. Counseling, as the mother pursues, can rebuild trust. She might also lean on her mom group for practical support. The husband must own his role as an equal parent.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Reddit’s take on this parenting saga is as fiery as a new mom’s exhaustion! From outrage at the husband’s neglect to cheers for the mother’s resolve, the community serves up raw support and tough love.

These reactions highlight the pain of unequal loads, but do they fully grasp the couple’s path to repair?

This curfew tale reveals how new parenthood can strain even strong marriages. The mother’s plea for help, met with mockery, underscores the need for equal partnership. Her courage to demand change and seek counseling offers hope, but the road ahead is long. Have you faced an unequal load in parenting or marriage? What would you do in her shoes? Share your stories below!