AITA for reporting someone to HR and recording them?

In a UK legal office, a man of mixed Indian descent faced a coworker’s relentless cultural assumptions and insults, delivered in fluent Hindi he didn’t speak. After HR dismissed his initial complaint for lack of proof, he recorded the coworker’s taunts, revealing racist slurs and mockery that led to a firing. Now, the coworker’s social media rants blame him for the fallout. This Reddit saga asks: was recording and reporting the behavior justified, or did he go too far?

This story strikes a chord for anyone facing workplace harassment or cultural stereotyping. Reddit’s firmly in the man’s corner, but is his approach airtight? Let’s unpack this clash of cultures and accountability, explore expert insights, and hear the community’s verdict.

‘AITA for reporting someone to HR and recording them?’

I am a brown man, of mixed english, scottish, and indian descent. I currently work in a legal office, in the uk and we have an American working with us. He prides himself on being super diverse and available to all cultures. I honestly don't know much about him, but he's always making everything about race.

Everytime I speak, it's something like 'did they teach you that in India? Is the teaching there super strict'. I'll call this guy Brian for ease. I've always found him highly offensive. He makes comments about how Indians are super good at maths, but the parents are almost always abusive as hell. Recently, his 'thing' has become learning Hindi.

Obviously, because I'm brown and have an Indian name, I must know Hindi. I don't know Hindi at all. Being honest, I've always felt more like a white guy in brown skin because I grew up in London, around white people, and around British culture. I feel no real connection to any part of Indian culture and i'm ok with that. Brian is not.

Every time he needs to speak to me, he exclusively speaks Hindi. He's doing a pretty good job of learning it, because he is speaking quite fluently, and only really uses words in english every once in a while. Every single time I say anything, he responds only in Hindi. This happens even when I'm not talking to him.

Eventually I got fed up and reported him to HR, but they said there was no solid proof, so they couldn't do anything more than tell him not to, because he denied it. So, I started putting my phone on record, and whenever he'd come to me, he'd start off speaking Hindi. I told him that I do not speak Hindi, and he would continue speaking Hindi. I got all of this on recording and sent it to HR.

Apparently they also translated what he was saying and found out half the time he was insulting me, my family, the fact that I have scars from wars, and a s**t ton of other including stuff like 'how can a brown Paki like you not even understand Hindi. Trying to be some white guy is it?'

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This obviously got him fired and now whenever we get calls about recommendations, we tell him what he did. He recently began a flame war on social media about me and how it's my fault I don't understand Hindi and how he was just trying to learn a new language, and that I should apologise.. AITA?

This workplace drama exposes the harm of racial stereotyping and the power of evidence in addressing harassment. Dr. Derald Wing Sue, a psychology professor, notes in Microaggressions in Everyday Life that “persistent cultural assumptions, like expecting someone to speak a language based on their appearance, can create a hostile work environment.” Brian’s insistence on speaking Hindi, paired with insults about the man’s identity and scars, wasn’t just ignorance—it was targeted harassment. Recording became a necessary tool when HR initially dismissed the complaint.

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The conflict centers on accountability: the man sought respect, while Brian hid behind “cultural appreciation.” A 2022 study in the Journal of Occupational Psychology found that unaddressed microaggressions lower workplace morale and productivity, validating the man’s escalation to HR. His recordings, revealing overt racism, justified the firing, though UK laws on workplace recordings require careful handling to avoid legal risks.

Dr. Sue advises documenting harassment and reporting it through proper channels, as the man did. He could have warned Brian about recording to strengthen his case ethically. For others, consulting HR policies on recordings and seeking allies can bolster claims.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

The Reddit crowd unleashed a wave of support, shredding Brian’s racism with wit and outrage. Here’s what they had to say:

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Keziah_70 - NTA he is a r**ist.

somegingershavesouls - NTA that guy was an a**hole and gaslighting you at every turn

canberrastreets - NTA.. You asked him to stop and he didn't.. It was at work so HR had the right to know of it and deal with a toxic employee.. If he was just talking in Hindi I doubt he would have been fired.. Report him on all the Social media platforms he starts up on.

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NinjaBabaMama - NTA. I think it's hilarious how the trash (Brian) took himself out. As for the flame war, you could reply to him, 'They have manners in India, you could try learning those too.'

dr-sparkle - NTA. Ugh of course the American Brian didn't know that not all Indians in India speak Hindi, there are many official languages in India. Indians not in India don't all speak Hindi either. His own actions got him fired.

lorrus - You are not the a**hole. I feel like this needs to be said in a Maury Povich voice because that guy was an absolute ass.. NTA

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SparklyRoniPony - Also, if you aren’t already, report him for harassment AND racism on all the social media platforms he’s using to disparage you.

SparklyRoniPony - NTA. He’s probably the American who says “but my best friend is black!” It’s him, not you.

Shelbelle4 - Nta. That guy is a j**kass. I would type the story out just like this for social media and tag him in it. And then never respond to anything from him ever again.

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8LeggedHugs - NTA and as a Brian myself, I'd like to apologize on behalf of my people for letting this one out into the world. He was from a defective batch, and we sincerely hope you will give other Brians a chance to make a better impression.

These takes cheer the man’s evidence-gathering but urge social media counters—do they miss the emotional toll? Brian’s online flame war paints him as the victim—gaslighting or desperation?

This tale of workplace racism and a recorded reckoning shows how standing up to harassment can spark backlash. The man’s recordings nailed a bigot, but was he too stealthy? Should he engage Brian’s online rants or rise above? How do you tackle cultural insensitivity at work? Drop your stories and thoughts below—let’s keep this fiery debate rolling!

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