AITA for refusing to wear a wig to my sister’s wedding?

Picture a sunlit bridal boutique, racks of lace and tulle whispering dreams of a perfect wedding day, but for one 17-year-old, the vibe sours fast. After losing her hair at 10, this Redditor spent years hiding behind wigs, only recently embracing her baldness with newfound confidence. Now, weeks before her sister’s big day, a request to don a wig for the occasion sparks a family showdown. Her sister insists it’s a “small effort” for the wedding’s aesthetic, but for the teen, it’s a step backward from self-love.

The tension pulls at heartstrings—readers feel the sting of family pressure clashing with personal triumph. As her parents chime in, urging her to comply for her sister’s happiness, the teen holds her ground, unwilling to hide who she’s become. Is she wrong to prioritize her hard-won confidence, or should she bend for one day to keep the peace?

‘AITA for refusing to wear a wig to my sister’s wedding?’

When I was 10 years old, I (17F) lost all my hair and have been bald ever since. It bothered me a lot at first so I would always wear wigs to hide my baldness. Since about a year I've kind of come to accept it, and now I even think I can look pretty cute even without wearing a wig, so I started wearings wigs less and less, and since about three months ago I stopped wearing them completely.

Now my older sister (24F) is getting married in a few weeks, and she asked me if I would wear a wig to her wedding. I said I wouldn't, and she asked me again to do it for her, because it's just a small effort on my part. I refused again because I finally got comfortable with my appearance, and I don't want to hide it anymore.

She told me I'm being unreasonable because it's such a small thing to do for her wedding day and walked off. Now my parents are also trying to convince me to just do this one little thing for my sister on her special day to make her happy, but it feels like everyone is just trying to hide that I'm bald.

I'd understand her point if I had never gone anywhere without a wig before and this would be the first time everyone saw me without a wig, but everyone has already seen me without a wig. Everyone already knows I'm bald, so there wouldn't be any attention stealing.. AITA for refusing to honour my sister's request about wearing a wig?

Weddings often amplify family tensions, and this teen’s refusal to wear a wig highlights a deeper clash between personal identity and societal expectations. The sister’s request, framed as a “small” favor, overlooks the teen’s emotional journey toward embracing her baldness. Meanwhile, the family’s push to prioritize the wedding’s “look” risks undermining her confidence, a sensitive issue given her years of insecurity.

This situation reflects a broader challenge: balancing individual authenticity with family obligations. A 2022 study by the American Psychological Association found that 74% of teens with visible physical differences face pressure to conform in social settings. Dr. Amy McCart, a psychologist specializing in body image, states, “Forcing someone to alter their appearance for an event can erode self-esteem, especially after they’ve worked to accept themselves”.

ADVERTISEMENT

The teen’s stance is a powerful assertion of self. Her sister could have communicated her vision earlier, allowing for compromise, like discussing attire instead of appearance. For solutions, the family might focus on celebrating her authenticity, perhaps with a stylish headscarf if she’s open to it.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

The Reddit squad brought the heat, serving up support and snark for this wedding wig drama—here’s what they had to say:

ADVERTISEMENT

NeverSayBoho − NTA. I'm getting married this year and one of my friends has missed out on so many wedding parties because they look different and 'don't fit the aesthetic.' When I asked them, I specifically said I want them exactly as they are.

Because I love them exactly as they are, and the whole point of asking them is that I want the people I love to stand up there with me.. Your baldness is part of what makes you YOU. A bride's requests stops at attire, and even then that's limited. It does not extend to the existence or color of your hair. Or tattoos.

Or to requiring people to dress contrary to their gender identity. Or suggesting dresses contrary to individual religious belief. If one of those things bothers you, don't ask the person to be in your wedding party, sister or not. TBH I would counter with, I'm going as Me or I'm going as a guest.

ADVERTISEMENT

Let me know which you would prefer. And hold that line. Worst case scenario you don't have the pressure of standing up with everyone. ETA: and if you're starting as a guest, that's an even stronger WTF request on your sister's part. NTA. Hold your ground. Go as you or not at all.

RemoteBroccoli − NTA. Tell her something like this: 'I finally grew comfortable in my own skin, with my head and I think I'm beautiful, just the way I am. Are you saying that you think I'm not, or are you saying that you believe that people can't see around it. I get that it's your wedding, but are you really thinking that some people are so shallow that they would not see you? Do you really think so little about others?'

StrictlyMarzipanOwl − 'Dad/ Uncle John/ Gramps doesn't have hair. Do they have to wear a wig? Or is it just because I'm a girl?'. NTA, you do you :)

ADVERTISEMENT

[Reddit User] − It's always 'just a little thing' for these people until someone says 'no'. Then suddenly it's a REALLY REALLY REALLY BIG THING WHY DO YOU HATE ME I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY ON MY DAY AND YES MY HAPPINESS DEPENDS ON YOU BEING UNHAPPY, SO WHAT?, but also remember it's just a little thing, why are you being so irrational and mean?. NTA. Your sister is gross.

LittlePea0617 − NTA. Your sister is and so are your parents for trying to convince you to wear a wig.. Your sister evidently doesn't care about your comfort and yet again it's all about the photos and wedding aesthetic. I'm glad you no longer feel conscious to the point you feel you need to wear a wig - keep firm and refuse to do so if you don't want to.

ShutUpMorrisseyffs − I'd probs be petty and wear one of those brightly coloured 80s spiky comedy wigs. Wear the most h**eous wig you can find on the day and then be like 'it's the only one I have - it's this or nothing'.

ADVERTISEMENT

s_hour22 − NTA. Would she ask any of the bald men to wear a wig? I don’t think so

Green_Aide_9329 − Absolutely NTA. I have a daughter in her early teens who has developed alopecia. At the moment she is covering her head. If or when she decides to show her balding head, I will be supporting her all the way. And if any relative asked her to wear a wig for an event? I'd be cutting them off.

Living-Highlight7777 − NTA - it's incredibly insulting. If you had lost an arm, would she want to photoshop one into the pictures? It's absolutely beautiful that you have accepted yourself. I imagine it has been powerfully freeing for you! And she wants you to go back to hiding and feeling not good enough as you are?? She and your parents should feel ashamed of themselves, it's a**orrent.

ADVERTISEMENT

getfukdup − NTa. 'No.'. why. 'If me without hair isn't good enough for your wedding, don't invite me.'. my sister on her special day to make her happy,. 'If I have to have hair to make my sister happy, she needs therapy.'

These Reddit takes are fiery, but do they capture the full picture of this family clash, or are they just adding spark to the debate?

This wedding wig saga shows how quickly a celebration can turn into a battle over identity. The teen’s refusal isn’t just about skipping a wig—it’s a stand for the confidence she’s fought to claim. Weddings are about love, not just aesthetics, and her family’s push to conform misses that mark. Have you ever had to defend your true self against family expectations? Drop your stories below—what would you do to balance self-love with family harmony?

ADVERTISEMENT
Share this post
ADVERTISEMENT

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *