AITA for refusing to meet a woman at the police station to sell her an item listed online?

A shiny new off-road fridge, won at a charity event, seemed like an easy sell for a Reddit user—until a flaky buyer turned the deal into a headache. After standing him up twice, the buyer, a woman, demanded he lug the heavy cooler to a police station for her safety, sparking a fiery clash. When he refused and sold to someone else, she unleashed a tirade, leaving him wondering if he was too harsh.

This AITA post unpacks a classic online marketplace tussle, blending safety concerns with seller boundaries. The OP’s friend called him a jerk, but Reddit’s got his back. Was he wrong to stick to his terms, or did the buyer cross a line? Let’s dive into this fridge-fueled drama, where logistics and tempers collide.

‘AITA for refusing to meet a woman at the police station to sell her an item listed online?’

What started as a straightforward online sale spiraled into a saga of missed meetups and heated demands. Here’s the Reddit user’s story in their own words:

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I recently won an off road fridge at a charity event and decided to sell it via various off road and jeep forums. Someone messaged (I assumed it was a man, they never sent a name) got my cell number and texted that they wanted to buy it. They set a time to come to my house and get it, then stood me up and promised to get it tomorrow at the same time.

Tomorrow about 45 minutes after they were supposed to show up they call me. She says she actually came yesterday and came again today, but got to scared to get out of the car and she wants me to put the fridge in my Jeep and drive to the police station. Folks, I do not live in the best neighborhood, but I am not in a bad one either.

I live directly across the street from an old folks home, I have a street light in my yard and it was only dusk not dark, I actually got up to look outside and check. I told her I was not willing to do that because the fridge was heavy and difficult to move with one person, but also because since they were supposed to pick it up.

I had already loaded tools into the back of my Jeep for my jobs I needed to do the next day. She got really upset with me and said I wasn't taking into consideration she was a woman and I was a man. I said if she was going to act like this that buying things used online wasn't for her or she needed to bring a friend but this was not my problem.

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She got really upset at me and called me some names, I didn't swear at her but did tell her she was acting like a child. She hung up on me and I went online and took another offer to sell the Fridge. A gentleman came and picked it up late that night and I promptly forgot all about it. Two days later, today, she calls and says she has a friend willing to ride with her and she will come get it now.

I informed her I had sold it to someone else and got called a bunch of names and hung up on again. I was telling a female friend of mine about this today and was shocked she said I was kind of a jerk about it.. Reddit, what do you guys think?

EDIT Additional Info for people wanting to know what an off road fridge is, its a giant YETI type cooler that has refrigeration in it. This one in particular has two sides. One side is fridge only, the other side is fridge or freezer. It can run on your cars power system, a regular electrical outlet, or even solar panels.

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This one was new in a box, so while it wasn't so heavy that one person absolutely cannot pick it up, the box did make it so wide that its very difficult to get a grip on it and move it alone. I planned to help whoever came to get it pick it up and get it into their vehicle.
This fridge sale fiasco highlights the tricky dynamics of online transactions, where safety and convenience often clash. The buyer’s safety concerns as a woman were valid, but her failure to communicate upfront, coupled with standing OP up twice, shifted the burden onto him. His refusal to deliver the heavy fridge was practical, not dismissive.

Dr. Katherine Hertlein, a communication expert, notes, “Clear expectations in online exchanges prevent misunderstandings; last-minute demands erode trust” (Source). The buyer’s insistence on a police station meetup, while reasonable for smaller items, was impractical for a bulky fridge, especially after her no-shows. A 2022 Journal of Consumer Affairs study found that 60% of online sale disputes stem from poor communication or unmet expectations (Source).

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This ties to broader issues of gender and safety in online marketplaces. Women often take precautions, but sellers aren’t obligated to accommodate every request. Advice: OP could have suggested a neutral, well-lit public spot, like a parking lot, as a compromise. For future sales, stating pickup terms upfront avoids drama. The buyer should have arranged help or clarified needs early.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Reddit brought the heat, dishing out spicy takes on this online sale showdown. Here’s what the community had to say about the OP’s fridge-selling saga:

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kjbtetrick − NTA as a woman, I’d have made arrangements to have someone with me to help load. This is poor planning on her part.

CoffeeEnemaWarrior − NTA. As a woman, if you are uncomfortable, you need to hash that out on your own. It’s not your responsibility to wait around for her to make the situation ideal for her.

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Had she asked you to arrange a pick up at a police station prior to committing to buying it and you refused, then that’s a different story, but she was out of line expecting you to accommodate her after she already stood you up once.

PrincessSra − NTA. She was ok to ask, she was ok to feel uncomfortable about going to a stranger's house. But people usually exchange easily portable stuff at the police station, like smaller electronics, boxes of books/CDs, etc , not a fridge! She already bailed on you twice. Based on that track record, you had no way of knowing would they actually show up the third time.

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dancing_chinese_kid − NTA. *'Oh if you'd just load it up and bring it to me.'*. lol NOPE.

Smashingradiopixies − NTA thats how selling stuff works first come first serve if you get stood up twice thats a clear indication you should deal with someone else, im currently selling a guitar on offerup and i ignore or am very firm with people who 1 lowball me like asking for half the asking price and 2 people who waste time.

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MadHatter − NTA. Tons of people do prefer to do their exchanges at places like police stations to make people feel safer, but you, as the seller have no obligation to do so, especially if you had someone else to sell it to that was more convenient. She also had no obligation to go to your house. It’s just a deal that didn’t work out…no biggie.

scrapfactor − NTA. you set the terms for the sale and are under no obligation to change them. If she had options to bring a friend she probably should have been enough of an adult to act with civility towards you. She'd probably be the happy owner of an off road fridge (I still don't know what that is but it sounds cool).

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9okm − NTA. Totally fine. Everyone has different safety thresholds when it comes to meeting strangers from the internet. You two were at an impasse. No hard feelings. Next buyer.. Being stood up, however, SUCKS. Source: I sell a lot of stuff.

[Reddit User] − People are so frustrating to deal without regarding selling s**t online. I had someone call me a B because I said “no” to putting the mattress I was giving away FOR FREE in a truck and driving it 20 miles to the person. I don’t even have a truck. And if I did that’s still the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.. NTA.

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BDThrills − NTA I've run into the weirdest Craigslist people full of entitlement. I had FREE stuff and they wanted ME to jump hoops for them to get it. You were not a jerk about it.

I always just say in my ads for the stupid people 'This is heavy, bring someone to help because at most I will only hold the door.' Most recently, I had a free item and the AH wanted me to hold it for a week despite my ad saying I do not hold unless you are on your way. It was free. Come on!

These Reddit zingers roast the buyer’s antics, but do they miss her safety perspective? Is OP’s stance fair, or could he have bent a bit?

This off-road fridge sale spun into a wild ride of no-shows, demands, and name-calling, leaving the OP caught between practicality and a buyer’s safety fears. His refusal to haul a heavy cooler to a police station cost him a sale but won Reddit’s applause. Was he a savvy seller or too rigid? Have you faced a tricky online deal? What would you do in this heated exchange? Drop your thoughts below and keep the convo chilling!

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