AITA for refusing to help out a pregnant coworker?
In a bustling childcare center, the air hums with toddler giggles and the rustle of diaper changes, a daily rhythm for two coworkers in the 1-2-year-old room. But when one, six months pregnant and struggling with nausea and lifting, asked to be excused from diaper duties, the other faced an unfair burden: handling all 30-plus daily changes alone. The pregnant coworker’s request, met with a supervisor’s shrug and no extra pay, pushed the OP to draw a line, threatening to quit rather than shoulder the load.
The tension that followed wasn’t just about diapers—it was about fairness, workplace support, and standing up for oneself. The OP’s refusal stirred frustration with her coworker, but their later alliance to confront their boss hints at a deeper bond. This story of workplace woes and tough choices resonates with anyone who’s faced an uneven load at work, questioning where duty ends and fairness begins.
‘AITA for refusing to help out a pregnant coworker?’
Diaper changes may seem like small tasks, but piling them all on one worker sparked a big conflict in this childcare center. The OP faced an unfair demand to cover her pregnant coworker Bethany’s diaper duties—up to 30 daily—while juggling her regular tasks, all without extra pay. Bethany’s struggles with nausea and lifting are valid, but the supervisor’s solution unfairly burdened the OP, leading to her firm refusal and a threat to quit.
This scenario highlights a broader issue: workplace accommodations and fairness. A 2022 study by the Society for Human Resource Management found that 58% of employees feel resentful when accommodations for one worker increase others’ workloads without compensation. The OP’s stand reflects a push for equity, as Bethany’s exemption left her with less demanding, “fun” tasks like activities, creating an imbalance.
Dr. Amy Edmondson, a workplace dynamics expert, notes, “Fairness in workplaces requires transparent solutions that don’t overburden one employee to accommodate another”. Here, the supervisor’s quick fix ignored the OP’s workload, fueling resentment. Bethany’s upset reaction, calling for team spirit, missed the mark, as the OP wasn’t supported either.
To resolve this, the OP and Bethany’s united front to demand additional help or a role switch for Bethany is a strong step. If unresolved, Bethany’s early leave or the OP’s job search are fair moves. This story underscores the need for balanced accommodations, inviting reflection on how workplaces can support all employees without playing favorites.
These are the responses from Reddit users:
Reddit’s community backed the OP, seeing her refusal as a stand against unfair workload dumping. They criticized the supervisor for not exploring solutions like hiring temporary help or moving Bethany to a room with toilet-trained kids, arguing that the OP shouldn’t bear the brunt of Bethany’s limitations without compensation.
While some sympathized with Bethany’s pregnancy challenges, most felt the boss was the real culprit for failing to manage the situation equitably. The consensus praised the OP and Bethany’s plan to confront their supervisor together, viewing it as a constructive move to address a flawed system rather than pitting coworkers against each other.
This daycare drama shows how quickly workplace imbalances can spark tension, especially when management sidesteps fair solutions. The OP’s refusal to take on extra diaper duties wasn’t about lacking compassion but demanding respect for her own workload. Have you ever faced an unfair task dump at work? Share your stories below—how would you handle this sticky situation?