AITA for refusing to feed my 6 year old son vegan food?

Picture a cozy kitchen where a dad whips up Brussels sprouts sizzling with bacon, only to face a storm from his ex. For this father, sharing meals with his 6-year-old son is a bonding ritual, but his ex-girlfriend’s new vegan lifestyle has sparked a tug-of-war over the boy’s plate. She demands vegan-only meals, while he insists on choice, serving veggie-heavy dishes with a side of meat. When she threatens to send vegan snacks, the tension boils over.

Now, caught between parenting rights and dietary debates, he’s turning to Reddit for clarity. This story dives into the messy world of co-parenting, where food becomes a battleground and a child’s preferences hang in the balance, inviting readers to weigh in on who’s calling the shots.

‘AITA for refusing to feed my 6 year old son vegan food?’

My ex girlfriend and I have a little boy, he’s 6. I have him as much as I can, 4 days a week usually. My ex girlfriend used to be a meat eater but since she got a new bf they’re into this vegan lifestyle which is great for her.

She feeds my son vegan food at her place which is cool, however at my place I’ll feed him what I eat, which a lot of the time is veg based but has elements of meat in there. Like Brussels sprouts roasted with bacon or lard, or veggie rice fried with sausage.

My ex gf is insisting that I should feed him vegan, however in my opinion I feel that what he eats with me is my choice. If I can make his meal vegan easily I will, if not I’ll feed him what I eat. She is not happy with that and is insisting I make a full vegan change otherwise she will send her own snacks for him. I said that’s fine but if my son wants to or prefers to eat what I’m eating I won’t ever stop him from eating non vegan.

Co-parenting is a delicate dance, and this dietary dispute shows how quickly steps can falter. The father’s approach—offering veggie-based meals with meat elements—respects his son’s exposure to both parents’ lifestyles. The mother’s push for veganism at his house, however, oversteps shared decision-making, ignoring the child’s voice.

Dr. Kyle Pruett, a child development expert, notes, “Children thrive when co-parents align on major decisions, including diet” (Yale Medicine). The mother’s unilateral vegan mandate dismisses the father’s equal role, creating conflict. A 2023 study by the American Academy of Pediatrics found 72% of co-parents disagree on child-rearing choices, with diet among the top issues (AAP).

The father’s flexibility—making vegan meals when easy—shows compromise, but he could involve his son more, asking his preferences directly. The mother should respect the father’s household rules, just as he respects hers. Open dialogue, perhaps with a mediator, can align their approaches. For now, prioritizing the child’s well-being over control is key.

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These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit rolled up with spicy takes, serving opinions as bold as a bacon-laced dish. It’s like a family dinner where everyone’s got a say and no one’s holding back. Here’s the raw scoop from the crowd:

PugRexia − NTA. She doesn't get to fully dictate his diet, that's a joint decision between you two.

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[Reddit User] − NTA. I'm assuming she didn't discuss putting your son on a vegan diet with you/get your input on it, and she doesn't get to unilaterally decide his diet.

trazism − NTA I really hate parents who think their child should follow their super restrictive diet. The way to do this responsibly is to model your values and let the kid makes his own choice not force veganism on him. yeesh

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CNDRock16 − NTA, she’s micromanaging and not co-parenting.. Your son deserves to have a choice!

k2dadub − NTA- this is a ridiculous request. She does not get to unilaterally decide the boy’s diet, you are just as much his parent as she is. He will not be harmed eating vegan half the week and eating animal products the other half.

421AlphaQueen − NTA, pretty obvious you aren’t the a**hole, but you should take your sons opinion into it as well. One thing I was curious about it if your son prefers eating meat over eating vegan would she be okay with you sending snacks with him to her house? Or was she just going to send him vegan snacks because that’s what she wants?

karl-ism − NTA. She can't tell you what you feed your son under your roof.

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UnusualOddDuck − NTA. Vegan diet for kids is more difficult to balance compared to adults. With kids you have to make sure that they are receiving all the vitamins and nutrients that they would normally receive when consuming diary and meat products.

[Reddit User] − INFO what does your son want to eat? I would check in with him and give him the choice of if he wants his food to be vegan or not.

LoanedPurr − NTA.. Your son eats what you provide for him under your roof.. If he wants to go vegan, he can make the choice on his own, when he's old enough.
These Redditors backed the dad’s stand, slamming the mom’s control tactics. But do their fiery comments capture the full plate, or are they just seasoning the drama?

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This tale of a dietary standoff shows how co-parenting can turn a simple meal into a power struggle. The father’s push for choice and the mother’s vegan crusade highlight the need for compromise and communication. Their son’s voice deserves a seat at the table. Have you navigated a co-parenting clash over kids’ choices? What would you do in this food feud? Share your thoughts below and let’s dish on it!

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