AITA for pulling into a parking lot and making my brother wait for 15 minutes after he lied to me?

A 20-year-old woman grew frustrated when her 17-year-old brother lied about needing to pick up his girlfriend to get to school early and meet friends. Due to COVID-19, their parents stopped him from taking the bus, but grew tired of waking up early for his schedule. When she took over driving duties and he repeated the lie, she pulled into a supermarket parking lot for 15 minutes as a lesson, dropping him off just before school started.

This incident sparked debate about honesty and consequences in family dynamics. Was she right to teach him a lesson? Or did she overreact to a minor lie? The online community weighed in, with many supporting her stance on honesty, while others criticized the family’s lack of communication and flexibility.

AITA for pulling into a parking lot and making my brother wait for 15 minutes after he lied to me?’

The brother wants to arrive at school by 7:30 AM to socialize.

I(20F) have a younger brother(17m) who's a student. His school starts at 8am but he wants to get there by 7.30, preferably even sooner because she likes to hang out...

COVID-19 restrictions forced their parents to drive him, requiring early wake-ups.

Because of 'rona my parents don't want my brother to take the packed bus to school so they drive him themselves.

Since my brother also wants to arrive at school extremely early my parents also have wake up way earlier so my brother can get his way. My parents and my...

Parents grew frustrated but sometimes drove his girlfriend, delaying arrival.

At some point my parents got fed up and refused to wake up earlier so my brother can meet his friends before school. My brother got really pissed.

Then my brother got a girlfriend. Sometimes my parents take a detour to also pick the girlfriend up but that results in them arriving at school only about ten minutes...

Because of the detour they also have to leave the house at 7.10am like they usually would if my brother got his way. Since my parents like my brother's girlfriend...

The girlfriend’s schedule didn’t always require early drop-offs.

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My brother's girlfriend doesn't always have to be at school by 8am, sometimes she can get there later because of her schedule. If she has to be at school later...

The brother lied about picking up his girlfriend to arrive early.

Now, for the past couple of weeks my brother started lying to my parents so he can get to school earlier. He basically says that they also have to pick...

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and halfway to school he says that they actually don't have to pick her up. Then my parents arrive at school at 7.30am, just like my brother wants to so...

She took over driving and caught him in the same lie.

For the past week I have been driving my brother to school because of my parents' work schedules.

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We also picked his girlfriend up a couple times but yesterday my brother pulled what he had been pulling with my parents for over a month now. Halfway through our...

Angry, she stopped in a parking lot for 15 minutes.

I got PISSED and pulled into the next supermarket parking lot, where my brother started yelling at me. I just sat there playing on my phone for 15 minutes, then...

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Their parents had mixed reactions, leaving her uncertain.

When my brother got home from school he started to complain about me and insult me to my parents. My mom says what I did was just what my brother...

So was I overreacting? AITA for pulling into the parking lot and wait for 15 minutes after my brother lied to me?

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She clarified he can’t drive and meets friends outside school.

EDIT: Wow so this blew up very unexpectedly. First of all, thank you so much for the awards, I really appreciate it! Secondly I want to answer some of the...

1)Why can't he drive himself? -> in my country you have to be 18 years old to drive by yourself.

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2)Can he hang out with his friends outside of school? -> Yes. He hangs out with them every weekend and sometimes after school.

This situation highlights tensions around honesty, responsibility, and family communication.

Psychologist Dr. Becky Kennedy explains, “Teenagers often lie to achieve their goals, but clear boundaries are essential to foster mutual respect and accountability within families” (Good Inside, 2022). The brother’s repeated lies to manipulate the family’s schedule show a disregard for others’ time and effort. The sister’s decision to stop for 15 minutes was a reasonable consequence, signaling that dishonesty has repercussions. It aimed to teach him accountability without causing harm, as he still arrived at school on time.

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However, her approach might have been impulsive, missing an opportunity for dialogue. A direct conversation with her brother and parents about his motivations—likely driven by a need to connect with friends during COVID—could have addressed the root issue. The parents’ mixed reactions highlight a lack of consistent discipline, which may enable such behavior. A unified family approach would prevent future manipulation.

Expert Advice: Hold a family meeting to discuss the brother’s needs and establish honest solutions. Set clear rules that lying will result in specific consequences, like losing rides. Encourage the brother to propose a fair schedule while ensuring parents align on discipline.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

The online community largely supported the sister but offered diverse perspectives.

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Most felt she was justified in teaching her brother a lesson.

ZZtheMagnificent − NTA, you're a f__king legend. He's definitely TA for lying to you and your parents though he deserved it

RandomUchiha − NTA You’re brother had been LYING to you and your parents, making you adjust your plans to fit his own even though he didn’t need it. If you...

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cj_fromthesea − NTA. Your brother manipulated you guys to cater to his schedule. It's one thing to ask to be dropped off early and another to be lied to about...

Also you guys don't have to pick up his gf but do so sometimes anyways and that's rad. He's acting entitled and needed to be taken down a peg. And...

Havershamhouse − NTA. Youre doing your brother a favour. Hes 17 not 7, surely by now he should have learned that lying just to get your own way has consequences

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ChewMyFudge − NTA. Your brother could have asked you nicely to give him a rider earlier, instead he chose to lie and thinks that's okay? He has no respect for...

[Reddit User] − I'm with your mum on this one. Exactly what was needed. You didn't over do it at all. NTA

LalalaHurray − NTA. Dad needs to start waking up early again if the thinks you overreacted.

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Some argued both were wrong due to poor communication.

green_chair_and_wall − Unpopular opinion, but ESH. I don’t understand why it’s a problem to get him there 30 minutes earlier than when the school starts. It’s 30 minutes, not 2...

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anonymommy15 − ESH. All of this over 20 minutes? What’s the big deal? What’s the problem with him wanting to hang out with his friends for a few minutes before...

YayPepsi − ESH. Yeah he shouldn't have lied, but come on. He shouldn't have to lie, just take him early like he wants. Soon he'll be graduating and he won't...

stardenia − ESH. The entire family is against the kid for wanting to be at school early to socialize and be with his friends?

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The f__k kind of crusade is that? Brother is an AH for lying, but what else is he supposed to do? All of his friends are hanging out before school...

probably k__ling him, and whether or not he’s a jerk, waking up 15-20 minutes earlier to take him to school anyway is not “waking up way earlier. ” And the...

Some emphasized addressing the issue through open dialogue.

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domingerique − The thing is, why doesn’t he meet his friends after school or smth? I think he might be very lonely during COVID and he probably just wants to...

One user pointed to the parents’ lack of clear boundaries.

Derilicte − NTA - the more I read of these issues, mainly involving school aged children, I just think again and again how terrible some parents are at setting boundaries...

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One user shared a personal story to highlight the brother’s disrespect.

LoonyCupcake − NTA I rarely took the school bus when I was in high school due to an older brother and then my grandpa when my brother graduated. My school...

I would never just change plans early morning to meet friends. If I didn’t see my friends before homeroom, I’ll see them later in the day. Your brother sounds like...

The community mostly backed the sister, stressing the need for honesty, though some urged more family flexibility.

Honesty is crucial in family relationships. Setting clear boundaries prevents manipulation, but open communication offers lasting solutions.Have you dealt with a family member lying to get their way? How did you resolve it?

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