AITA for ordering a meat dish while eating with my vegan friend?

Picture a cozy restaurant, the clink of cutlery mingling with soft chatter, until a beef dish lands on the table and flips the mood. A casual dinner between colleagues takes a sharp turn when one, a staunch vegan, recoils at her friend’s meaty choice and demands a change—or an exit.

Stunned, the meat-eater stands firm, leading to a solo meal on a park bench and a Reddit thread buzzing with opinions. Was this a clash of personal choices or a failure to accommodate? Dive into this tale of dietary drama and decide for yourself.

‘AITA for ordering a meat dish while eating with my vegan friend?’

Yesterday my friend /acquaintance and I went to a restaurant after work. She is a vegan and ordered a vegan dish. I ordered something that contained beef. When my dish came, my friend was shocked to see that it contained meat because she assumed that it didn’t (for some reason).

She said she no longer felt comfortable eating at the same table as me unless I sent the food back. I said no way I was going to do that. She said “maybe we can reschedule” and that she was sorry but she could not eat with someone who was eating meat. I said ok maybe we can get our food packed up.

We did and then she said she wasnt feeling good and had to go back to her hotel. So I just sat on a bench in the park and ate my food by myself. It was really weird. Should I have been more accommodating? She isn’t allergic to anything, apparently the smell of meat makes her sick? Which I just found out today. AITA.

This dining debacle highlights the tension between personal choices and social expectations. As psychologist Dr. Melanie Greenberg explains, “Respecting differences in values is key to maintaining relationships” (source: Psychology Today). The vegan friend’s discomfort may stem from ethical convictions, but her ultimatum risks alienating her companion, who simply made a personal dietary choice.

The friend’s reaction—leaving over the presence of meat—suggests a rigid boundary. Studies show 6% of Americans identify as vegan or vegetarian, often citing ethical concerns (source: Gallup, 2020). Yet, imposing those beliefs on others can strain relationships. The poster’s refusal to send back their meal reflects their own boundary but may have missed a chance for compromise, like discussing restaurant choices beforehand.

This scenario reflects broader social dynamics around dietary diversity. Veganism’s rise—up 600% from 2014 to 2018 in the U.S.—can create friction in mixed-diet settings. Both parties could benefit from mutual respect: the vegan acknowledging the poster’s choice, and the poster considering her discomfort, especially if the smell was an issue.

For solutions, they could agree on vegan-friendly venues in the future or discuss boundaries openly. Dr. Greenberg suggests active listening to bridge value gaps.

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Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Reddit served up a sizzling platter of reactions, with most users backing the poster and roasting the vegan friend’s dramatic exit. From calling her out for preaching to praising the poster’s stance, the comments are a spicy mix of support and shade. Here’s a peek at the Reddit feast—dig in!

PatBurrellTheMachine − NTA. She sucks.

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deniseamd9 − NTA - as a vegetarian those people drive me crazy. This is my choice NOT everyone else’s. And I would hate to make someone so uncomfortable.. And if she’s so committed, WHY did she pick a restaurant with meat in the first place????

CompanionCone − NTA. She's the kind of vegan who gives vegans a bad name.

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NotThatOneGirl − NTA. I'm vegan and don't give a crap what people around me eat.. People like her are the reason people dislike vegans. Ugh.

alangerhans − NTA she needs to get off her soapbox

Devourer_of_felines − NTA. Her diet, not yours.

namelessive − NTA - she lives in a world catered to meat eaters and acts pretentious around you?? I don’t think you should have to accommodate especially since she is not allergic.

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[Reddit User] − NTA. She's being ridiculous. I have, on occasion when eating out with vegetarian/vegan friends, asked if they minded if I ordered something with meat in it. On every occasion they've been surprised and said they absolutely would not mind.

fourbearants − NTA, I'd have some sympathy for the 'smell makes me sick' thing, as I get that with some fish, but that doesn't seem to have been her actual reason. She started off with not feeling comfortable, not wanting to eat with someone who was eating meat. If the smell of meat made her sick, presumably she'd only eat and vegetarian or vegan restaurants.. Friend needs to learn to respect other people's choices.

RolandTheHeadlessGun − S**t post. You know you're not the a**hole.. Edit: I changed my mind. YTA for posting a story where you're so obviously NTA

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These takes are hot, but do they carve out the real issue? Is the vegan friend’s reaction fair, or is she stirring the pot unnecessarily?

This meaty mishap leaves us with a half-eaten meal and a side of social awkwardness. The poster stood their ground, but the friend’s swift exit raises questions about respect and boundaries. Can these two find a table where both feel comfortable, or is this friendship off the menu? What would you do if a friend tried to veto your meal choice? Share your thoughts below!

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