AITA for openly laughing at my ex for punishing our daughter for “breaking” the wifi?

In a cozy condo, a 17-year-old babysitter hatched a plan as clever as it was cheeky: shut off the wifi to lure her young half-siblings away from their screens. What followed was a whirlwind of games, crafts, and an unexpected clash with her dad’s strict parenting. The teen’s mom, caught between laughter and loyalty, found herself at odds with her ex’s stern reaction.

This tale of modern parenting and tech-time battles unfolds with a mix of humor and heart. As screens dominate family life, one teen’s bold move sparks a debate about creativity, control, and connection. Readers, brace for a story that’s as relatable as it is riotous!

‘AITA for openly laughing at my ex for punishing our daughter for “breaking” the wifi?’

My ex and I have been divorced 11 years, we’ve both remarried. We have a 17yo together. She has several steps- and halfs on my side, and then two half-siblings on her dad's [4 and 5]. We never force her to babysit but she'll do it in exchange for other chores and babysit for other people's kids for extra cash, and I think she secretly likes it more than she lets on.

She's a good kid. She's saving up for some things so unusually she offered to babysit her dad's kids [4 and 5] as much as he would let her during her recent two week stay. He ofc jumped at the opportunity to have a few date nights with his wife. I barely know his kids so can't make a judgment but per my daughter they're 'boring' and have too much TV/tablet time.

But in my ex's defense they both work full-time jobs whereas at our house she has a live-in grandma and a stepdad that works from home plus more older kids, so it's easier for us to keep the kids from having too much screentime and give them attention. And we have a backyard, they live in a condo.

But at the end of her visit, her dad called me, obviously upset, and said that 17yo was going to be grounded for her last night with them because she “screwed with the wifi.” I thought he meant parental controls or something so was concerned,

and then he clarified that she had been turning off the wifi while babysitting and telling the kids it was “broken' and oh well I guess we'll have to play a game now. She openly told her dad it was because she was bored. I'm not sure if either kid mentioned it to the parent but I guess not enough because it took them a few date nights to realize what was going on.

Once I fully understood what my ex was saying, I couldn’t help laughing and saying, “you’re mad at her for playing with your kids instead of just watching TV with them?” And he was like she’s not their parent it was too controlling she lied to them.

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I was like she did you a favor, they even did a craft with her, and he got upset at me and said this was where her attitude came from. Ironically, her grounding was…taking away her devices for the night. She didn’t even mention the punishment to me, but I’m still in hot water with my ex for “undermining his parenting.”

He actually wanted me to have my own talk with her and potentially continue the punishment or at least the conversation in some way (which we both do for actual offenses) and I refused. She's not the kind of kid who would tell her dad/stepmom to their faces she thought his kids should have less screentime, but he might have picked up on her feelings anyway so maybe that's where this is coming from.

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This story of a teen’s wifi trick reveals a classic parenting clash, where creativity meets control. The daughter’s actions—turning off the wifi to engage her half-siblings—highlight a broader issue: balancing screen time with meaningful interaction in busy households.

Dr. Lisa Damour, a clinical psychologist, notes in a New York Times article, “Kids thrive when adults set clear boundaries around screen use, but flexibility fosters creativity” (nytimes.com). Here, the teen’s initiative aligns with Damour’s view, prioritizing play over passive screen time. Yet, her father’s reaction suggests he feels his authority was challenged, perhaps reflecting his own guilt over limited family time.

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The opposing perspectives are clear: the daughter saw her actions as resourceful, while her dad viewed them as deceptive. His full-time work and condo life may limit interactive opportunities, unlike the mom’s home with a backyard and live-in support. This tension mirrors a 2023 Pew Research study showing 59% of parents struggle to reduce kids’ screen time (pewresearch.org).

For solutions, open dialogue is key. The mom could encourage her daughter to discuss her intentions with her dad, framing it as care for her siblings. Meanwhile, the dad might reflect on Dr. Damour’s advice, embracing flexible boundaries to foster connection. Both parents could agree on consistent screen-time rules across households to avoid future clashes.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Reddit’s hot takes are as spicy as a family game night gone wrong! Here’s what the community had to say about this wifi saga:

DesertSong-LaLa − NTA - Your daughter is resourceful, creative and engaging. You see the value in her decision. He has limited views and is not applying critical thinking. No punishment necessary; she deserves a raise.

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letsdoitforthememes − NTA. What’s sad is I bet it was the best time his kids had had in ages.

Umm_what_I_think_is − NTA. Your ex husband is though. The children were not being ignored or neglected. It sounds like what he's really angry about is that your daughter was challenging his authority, and not because she actually did a bad/harmful thing.

I think you should let your daughter know you're on her side, and suggest that she not babysit for her father's other children again. It's not healthy for her emotionally to be at the mercy of her father's controlling behaviour.

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chuckinhoutex − NTA- but I would just tell him he's a h**ocrite and if he's trying to create reasons that his about to be adult daughter doesnt' want to see him as soon as it's her choice, he's doing it. Also, good luck getting her to babysit now that you've punished her for doing what any normal person would say is a fantastic job.

No-Rub1544 − NTA. I am laughing at your ex for this too

repolho_azul − NTA - He's probably feeling guilty and judged bc he doesn't have the time and feels bad about it. I assume he feels attacked by the fact that she did what he can't. Then, instead of just thanking her and valuing the fact that someone is doing that for him,

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and his partner, he got defensive and attacked back (even tho it doesn't sound like she was ever disrespectful, he felt attacked by his own guilt). The guy's not helping *anyone* with that immature attitude. Your ex doesn't know how to get in touch with his feelings and is taking out on your daughter, which seems to be a great person btw.. And I'd probably have laughed too. It's pathetic.

Algebralovr − NTA Wow, she turned off the WiFi on the little kids and did stuff with them? Amazing! Your Ex us the AH here.

Madhwie − NTA- I actually think that the kids liked playing games in stead of watching tv and he's afraid that they will be asking him/them to play with them, seeing they don't have much time, they won't be able to do that and that's what bothered him

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cassowary32 − NTA. Your ex is complaining about his kids interacting with their human babysitter and not the screen? What's the worst that could happen? They get a couple episodes behind on Coco Melon? Your daughter is amazing. Did your ex use this to get out of paying her for her time? Please feel free to give her a bonus tip.

xxgtui − NTA. I wonder if he also demands her complete and utter honesty when it comes to Santa, or tooth fairy, or whatever stuff parents casually make up these days. Or s**, for that matter. And swear words. He sounds like a d**k. And your daughter really sounds like a good kid. Keep supporting her. She might need it more than you realize.

These Reddit opinions are bold, but do they capture the full picture? Maybe the dad’s just not ready for his kids to trade Cocomelon for construction paper!

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This tale of a tech-savvy teen and a parenting tussle leaves us chuckling and reflecting. The daughter’s wifi trick was a clever nudge toward connection, but her dad’s reaction shows how parenting styles can clash in blended families. What’s the verdict—heroic babysitting or overstepping boundaries? Share your thoughts! Have you ever faced a parenting clash over screen time? What would you do in this wifi-free showdown?

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