AITA for not wanting to see my mother with her “husband” there and not letting my kids see him either?

In a quiet moment of reflection, a woman thought her mother’s whirlwind romance was behind them—until the man who lied about his wealth and properties slithered back into her life. Dubbed “Mr. Spain” for his fabricated tales of apartments abroad, this new husband shattered trust, yet her mother welcomed him back, dismissing her daughter’s concerns.

Refusing to let her children near him or see her mother in his presence, the woman drew a hard line, only to be called heartless. This Reddit story, raw with the sting of betrayal, echoes your own struggles with family boundaries, like your mother’s oversharing or your in-laws’ overreach. Is she wrong to protect her family, or is her mother’s choice a bridge too far?

‘AITA for not wanting to see my mother with her “husband” there and not letting my kids see him either?’

Family trust is fragile, and this Reddit user’s story shows how quickly it can crack. Her mother’s decision to reunite with a man who fabricated his life—demanding repayment for “gifts” no less—puts her daughter in an impossible spot. The user’s refusal to expose her kids to him prioritizes their safety, much like your own efforts to shield your privacy from your mother’s husband or set limits with intrusive in-laws. Her mother’s accusation of heartlessness reflects her own denial.

Dr. Judith Sills, a relationship psychologist, says, “When a parent chooses a toxic partner, adult children often face a loyalty conflict, forcing tough boundaries” . The user’s distrust of “Mr. Spain” is grounded in his proven deceit.

This taps into broader issues of balancing love for a parent with self-protection. The user could maintain contact through neutral settings, like public meetups without the husband, as you’ve done with selective family interactions. Therapy might help her mother see the manipulation.

Heres what people had to say to OP:

Reddit jumped in with a chorus of support for the user, branding “Mr. Spain” a conman and cheering her protective instincts, with a splash of humor to ease the tension. Here’s their take:

Reddit’s waving red flags, but are they catching the full emotional tangle or just roasting the villain?

This Reddit user’s stand to keep her family away from her mother’s dishonest husband has cost her peace but maybe saved her safety. Her story, like your own battles with family boundaries, asks where love ends and self-preservation begins. Is she right to draw this line, or should she find a compromise? How would you handle a parent’s partner you can’t trust? Share your thoughts or stories of navigating tricky family ties!