AITA for not wanting to give up some of my college money?

In a modest family home, where every dollar counts, a 16-year-old’s hard-earned savings became the center of a family storm. Working part-time at Walmart to fund her college dreams, she faced her mother’s demand to hand over $500 as a “gift” for her visiting grandmother—a cultural gesture she couldn’t afford. With her parents unable to save for her education and a history of her mom misusing her money, the teen stood firm, refusing to part with her future.

Her family’s backlash—calling her selfish and ungrateful—stung, especially when her siblings sided against her. Yet, she held her ground, even as her mother promised repayment, a vow she doubted. It’s a tale of a young woman’s fight for financial autonomy, caught between cultural duty and personal ambition. Was her refusal a bold stand, or a family betrayal?

‘AITA for not wanting to give up some of my college money?’

This family feud exposes the tension between cultural traditions and individual financial goals. The teen’s refusal to give $500—earned through her own labor—reflects a bid for autonomy in a family where her earnings are treated as communal. Her mother’s past misuse of her money and pressure to conform to cultural gifting norms, especially without reciprocity, borders on financial coercion. The family’s accusations of selfishness weaponize guilt to undermine her priorities.

Dr. Brad Klontz, a financial psychologist, notes in a 2022 Psychology Today article, “Family demands for money can erode trust when they dismiss personal goals, especially for young adults.” A 2021 Pew Research Center study found 60% of teens in low-income households feel pressure to contribute financially, often at the expense of education. The mother’s promise to repay lacks credibility given her history, justifying the teen’s skepticism.

Practical steps—like a secure bank account or discussing her goals with her grandmother—could protect her savings. Experts suggest open talks about financial boundaries and cultural expectations to align family values.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

The Reddit crew swooped in like a digital cheer squad, rallying behind the teen with a mix of support and outrage. Here’s the raw scoop from the online crowd, served with a side of financial wisdom:

Redditors unanimously backed the teen, labeling her mother’s demands as financial abuse and urging her to secure her money. Some suspected the mother’s motives, while others praised her resolve. Do these takes capture the family’s fault lines, or just fan the drama?

This story of a teen’s savings and a family’s demands shows how fast cultural norms can clash with personal goals. Her stand protected her college dreams but strained family ties, proving autonomy comes at a cost. It’s a reminder that family love shouldn’t demand sacrifice of a future. What would you do if your earnings were claimed by kin? Share your thoughts—how would you navigate this money mess?