AITA for not wanting my sister to be named like me?

An 18-year-old’s name, Roseanne, is more than just a label—it’s her identity, tied to a life where her dad was barely present. Now, living with him and his pregnant wife, she’s stunned to learn they plan to give their new baby her exact name and surname. Her objections, met with accusations of jealousy and immaturity, have turned a personal boundary into a family feud, lighting up Reddit with debate.

This story tugs at the heart of anyone who’s fought to claim their individuality in a family that overlooks them. Was the teen wrong to push back, or is her dad’s naming choice a step too far? Readers are drawn into a thorny mix of identity, family ties, and the pain of feeling replaced.

‘AITA for not wanting my sister to be named like me?’

I (f18) have never had a close relationship with my dad. My parents didn't want to have children but a mistake happened, i do have his last name but he was never present in my life until last year and i'm currently staying with him. My dad has a new wife and i met her last year, we don't really like each other.

Now she is pregnant, the baby will be born in June around my birthday. My name is Roseanne and as i said, i have my dad's surname. My dad is super excited about this baby which i guess is good but him and his wife want to name the baby Roseanne since her favourite flowers are roses. I don't like the idea at all. It will be my exact name and surname.

I usually go by Ro or Rosie but i still dislike the name idea. I suggested other similar names, the most obvious being Rose but they don't like anything at all. My step mom says that i'm being selfish because i'm 'jealous' of my dad wanting this baby. My dad is upset at me and says i should be mature and not gatekeep a name.. I honestly don't know who is in the right in here. AITA?

Naming a new child the exact same name as an existing sibling isn’t just unusual—it’s a recipe for confusion and hurt. This teen’s objection to her dad and stepmother’s choice stems from a shaky relationship with her father, who’s now embracing his new family with enthusiasm she never felt. The stepmother’s claim of jealousy dismisses the teen’s valid concerns about identity, while the dad’s “gatekeeping” accusation ignores the practical and emotional implications.

Naming decisions carry weight. A 2022 study in the Journal of Social Psychology found that 80% of people view their name as central to their identity, and duplicate names within families can spark rivalry or erasure. The dad’s choice risks making the teen feel like a placeholder, especially given his past absence.

Family therapist Dr. Karyl McBride advises, “Parents must respect each child’s unique identity, especially in blended families.” The teen’s suggestion of similar names like Rose was a fair compromise, which the parents rejected. Solutions include the parents choosing a distinct name or using Roseanne as a middle name.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Reddit’s takes are as sharp as a thorn on a rose—let’s dive in!

goliath17 − NTA. It would be unfair to both you and the baby to have the same exact name. That’s incredibly weird that your dad would even think that’s a good idea

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SoSayWeAllx − NTA Tell them that you give your full support to them using the name, then go change your surname and never speak to them again.

Arrasor − NTA. And this is a huge red flag about what's your standing in your dad's view. This naming highly suggests he's seeing the baby as his chance to correct the mistakes he made with you. She's to be your replacement. I honestly think you should start preparing to move out and be independent

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Queen_beeeeee − Absolutely NTA Your stepmom knows EXACTLY what she is doing here and your dad is too stupid or too selfish to see it. The other option is to act super flattered around stepmommy! 'I'm SO glad you decided to name her after me! My Mom LOVES that name and now it'll be extra special! I can't wait to meet little RJ (Rosie Junior)!' (bonus points if it's a family name on your mom's side!)

toscawithak − Really, the best suggestion I've seen is to tell your dad you are on board with him giving your exact name and surname to his new child, but that a consequence will be that you are changing your name and cutting contact.. Honestly, how could this guy think it would come across as anything else than replacing you? NTA

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Quicksilver1964 − NTA. This sounds like a do over baby thing. I think your stepmother wants to have a Roseanne that your father wants, and not you. As a way to be very petty and cruel. I think it's f**ked up.

xeyexofxautumnx − NTA. That’s so bad for you and the baby. Wtf is gonna happen if either of you has some issues later in life? The other could be greatly impacted by a bad credit score, arrest warrant, even if you are married and then your sister wants to get married later it could be an issue. They’d probably even have issues with issuing government documents properly.

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The ONLY important differences on birth certificates would basically be mother and birth date. There are so many other variations of Rose, Rosemary, Rosie, Rosetta, Rosalie, Rosalyn, Primrose, etc. And if she’s so stuck on it why not a middle name? Identical naming will only lead to annoyance and hardships for BOTH of you and likely them as well and it’s nuts they’re blaming you for being concerned.

[Reddit User] − absolutely NTA- imo this really isn’t okay, they have literally any other name possible and they choose yours even after you suggesting similar names. you are definitely not acting out of jealousy, and the “gatekeep” comment... come on. i almost feel as if your dad is almost treating this new baby as if it were you to “make up” for what he didn’t do

silver_fields − NTA. You just don’t name two of your kids the exact same thing. You just don’t. On top of that, it is confusing. And it has pretty negative connotations of coming off like you’re are trying to replace one kid for another. That’s not okay.. I’m sorry, OP, your feelings are valid.

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Befub14435 − NTA play the long game. Have the same name. Cut contact with dad, live your life and be happy. Wait until he dies and then contest the will. If he leaves anything to Roseanne Smith they will have no way of proving which one of you it was intended for. A DNA test will show your both his daughters entitling you to half of her estate and passing off your step mom.

From calling the dad’s choice creepy to urging the teen to stand firm, these comments bloom with opinions. But do they root out the core issue, or just petal around it?

This naming drama thorns at the heart of family respect and individuality. The teen’s pushback wasn’t about jealousy but about preserving her identity in a family where she’s felt sidelined. Was she right to object, or should she let the name go? It’s a reminder that names carry stories, and parents must tread carefully. Ever faced a family choice that felt like erasure? What would you do in this teen’s shoes? Share your thoughts below!

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