AITA for not taking my 7 month old daughter to my wife’s weekend job?

A new father finds himself in a tricky spot when his wife, juggling motherhood and a part-time weekend gig, asks him to change their routine. She’s been pumping milk for their 7-month-old daughter so he can care for her during her 4-hour Sunday market shifts, but now she’s tired of it. Her solution? He should bring the baby to the market, watch her, and even pitch in with work while she breastfeeds. He’s not having it, and the tension is real.

What seems like a simple request spirals into a debate about fairness, parenting roles, and personal boundaries. The father loves his bonding time with his daughter and doesn’t want to spend his Sunday at the market, essentially working an extra day. Beyond that, his suggestion to use formula gets shot down fast. The twist is, the online community has plenty to say about who’s in the right.

‘AITA for not taking my 7 month old daughter to my wife’s weekend job?’

Every family has their rhythm, and for this couple, it’s been working—mostly.

My wife and have a 7 month old baby. My wife is on mat leave but works Sundays at the local market for 4 hours, about 40 minutes from home....

For the last few months, she pumps enough milk throuought the week (we only need 10oz max for the weekend) so that I have enought to feed the baby on...

But change is brewing, and it’s not sitting well with everyone.

My wife told me today that she is tired of pumping, and that she wants me to start coming to sit at the market with her so that she can...

Basically would look after our daughter at the market while she worked (it's serving customers berries and chocolate for a friend's business). When baby wants to eat, the idea is...

Here’s where things get heated, as boundaries are drawn.

I drew a line in the sand, and said there is no way I'm ok with that. It would be difficult to look after her, and it basically means I'm...

I suggested we feed her a bottle or two of formula instead, but my wife is absolutely against that in fear that baby will prefer formula.. Am I the a**hole...

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This situation highlights a common tension in new parenthood: how to share responsibilities while respecting individual needs. The father values his Sunday bonding time with his daughter and sees the market request as an extra workday, disrupting their routine.

The wife, meanwhile, is grappling with the physical and emotional toll of pumping, seeking a solution that keeps her breastfeeding goals intact. Both perspectives are valid, but the proposed plan—dragging a 7-month-old to a market and juggling work—feels impractical and unfair to him.

From a broader societal lens, this reflects the pressure on parents to “do it all.” Breastfeeding, while deeply personal, often comes with intense expectations. Dr. Jack Newman, a renowned pediatrician and breastfeeding expert, notes, “Breastfeeding is not just about nutrition; it’s about connection, but it shouldn’t come at the cost of a parent’s well-being” (Newman, The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers, 2006).

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The wife’s resistance to formula is understandable, as many mothers fear it might disrupt breastfeeding, but modern formulas are safe and effective, as pediatricians widely confirm.

The community’s suggestions point to practical compromises. First, the couple could explore supplementing with formula for the 4-hour shift, easing the wife’s pumping burden without abandoning breastfeeding. Second, introducing age-appropriate solids, like mashed banana or rice cereal, could reduce the need for milk during the wife’s absence. Third, they should openly discuss whether the wife’s market job is worth the strain, as it’s a choice, not a necessity. Clear communication about priorities and boundaries will help them find a solution that respects both their needs.

Check out how the community responded:

The online crowd didn’t hold back, offering a mix of support, practical tips, and a touch of sass.

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These commenters rally behind the father, arguing his wife’s request crosses a line into unreasonable territory. They emphasize his right to downtime and question the logistics of the market plan.

Consistent-Pickle-88 − NTA, what’s wrong with formula? People need to stop acting like formula is dangerous. Formula is perfectly safe for your baby. Not to mention, this also cuts into...

Your wife is kinda being unreasonable. If she wants to directly breastfeed, is tired of pumping and is refusing formula, then she’ll need to stay home with the baby. I’m...

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Smarterthanuthink867 − NTA. You work full time and deserve to have your time with your baby. Also, if you drive 40 minutes one way to bring the baby to her...

If your wife doesn't want to pump and is completely against formula, she's just going to have to stop helping out her friend on Sundays.

smallishbear-duck − NTA Your wife’s desires are completely understandable, but don’t make practical sense and aren’t fair to you. (Saying this as a female myself. )

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GodzillaSuit − NTA. That's an outrageous request. She has three reasonable options: 1) continue pumping as she is now 2) switch to formula 3) stop working None of these answers...

You two need to sit down and discuss which one is the most preferable. It's crazy to ask you to spend your days off sitting around a store waiting for...

rachelbeane − NTA, you have given her appropriate choices. If she does not like either she can not go to work on Sundays.

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Legally_Blonde_258 − Nta, that's a lot to ask of you and also interrupts your bonding time.

Evening-Cry-8233 − NTA but not for the reasons anyone else is saying. She’s basically taking away your time to bond and chill with baby girl. You’d have to go with...

whatsupwillow − NTA, at 2 months, maybe, but at 7? It's not that serious to have a few bottles of formula. I breastfed and supplemented with formula for the whole...

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This group brings a problem-solving vibe, suggesting creative ways to ease the tension while wondering about the wife’s deeper motivations.

ThatAd2403 − Baby is 7 months- a great time to try out some solids during those daytime hours when mom has to be at work. Cooked pumpkin, mashed banana, apple...

If baby has a nurse before your wife leaves and when she gets home there is no need to pump. But as someone who nursed for over 5 years (5kids),...

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With empathy for both parents, this commenter tries to bridge the gap, acknowledging the wife’s struggle while supporting the father’s stance.

Sami_George − NAH. As a mom who breastfed and pumped, I get where your wife is coming from. I hated pumping so much. And I don’t know anyone who enjoys...

To be fair, it might be fun to visit the market with your 7 month old. However, you did not sign up to work on Sundays, which is what you’d...

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It genuinely doesn’t make sense to go out of your way to go to this market, play with your daughter until she gets hungry, work for a half an hour...

Your wife can pump once a week or stop working at this market. Or you can supplement with formula once a week, like you suggested. Right now, wife isn’t the...

Overall, the community leans heavily toward the father, praising his reasonable stance while offering practical solutions like formula or solids to ease the wife’s pumping woes.

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This family’s dilemma underscores the challenges of balancing parenting roles, personal boundaries, and breastfeeding pressures. The father’s refusal to haul his daughter to the market isn’t about dismissing his wife’s needs but about protecting his own time and their established routine. The wife’s request, while rooted in her dislike of pumping, overlooks the logistical burden it places on her husband.

The community’s input—ranging from formula advocacy to introducing solids—offers paths forward, but it all boils down to communication and compromise. What would you do in this situation? If you’re a parent, how do you and your partner navigate dividing responsibilities when one of you needs a break? Share your thoughts—any creative solutions for this couple?

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