AITA for not taking down my video that was a gift from my best man?

A wedding day should be filled with love and celebration, but for one groom, it was tainted by a familiar hurt: his parents’ absence. Once again, they prioritized his sister’s emotional crisis—this time over her sick dog—over his milestone, despite his pleas for reliability. His best man, a loyal friend with a flair for mischief, posted a viral video on social media, exposing their no-show with their own voicemail, turning private pain into public drama.

This Reddit saga strikes a chord with anyone who’s felt overlooked by family. The groom’s refusal to take down the video, despite family uproar, ignites a debate about loyalty, fairness, and the right to call out neglect. With raw emotion and a bold stand, this story draws readers into a family conflict where love and resentment collide.

‘AITA for not taking down my video that was a gift from my best man?’

I have a sister that’s 6 years older than me. My parents for years cancel on me last min because of my sister. I have a basketball game. Ops sorry sister doesn’t feel like going out. I am graduating ops sorry sister had a bad day at work. They have missed both major and smaller events in my life because of her melt downs.

I met the love of my life. We decided to tie the knot. From the beginning I told my parents how I am worried my sister will ruin another special moment in my life. My mom told me over and over again it would not happen. The day of my wedding. I received a voicemail from my mom saying they couldn’t come because my sisters dog was sick and she was upset.

I was hurt, my best man however is a jokester. He took my phone then went to my fiancé and asked if he could post a video of our wedding as a gift? On social media. She loved his idea. I had no idea about it until I came home. Our honeymoon was at a lake side cabin. No cell service. The post caption was “My best friend. He is an amazing person even if his parents NEVER showed up for him.

video was still pictures of us next to her parents, me on the dance floor, cutting the cake. Where you would normally see both parents in wedding pictures. The sound behind the video was my moms voice mail explaining how they couldn’t come because my sisters dog was sick.. I came home a week later to hundreds of messages.

Family members from both sides insisting I take it down. I was told my sister hasn’t stopped crying. My mom is refusing to leave the house. I maybe the A here. I didn’t take it down when I got my messages. I didn’t call my family back right away. I waited until my vacation time was over at work and enjoyed my time with my Wife. In our new home.

This wedding tale exposes the deep scars of parental favoritism, where one child’s needs consistently overshadow another’s. The parents’ choice to miss the wedding for their daughter’s pet-related distress is a glaring example of skewed priorities. Dr. Ellen Weber Libby, a family dynamics expert, notes, “Favoritism undermines family unity and erodes the self-esteem of the less-favored child.” The viral video, amplifying their voicemail, became a public reckoning for the groom’s long-suppressed pain.

The parents’ plea to remove the video, calling it “just a bad night,” dismisses a history of neglect. A 2022 study in the Journal of Family Issues highlights that 35% of adults in favored-child dynamics report strained parental relationships. The sister’s enabled meltdowns point to a broader issue: unchecked favoritism can fracture families. The parents’ shame seems more about exposure than genuine regret.

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Dr. Libby suggests, “Healing begins with parents owning their mistakes.” A heartfelt apology and a gesture, like hosting a belated celebration, could start mending ties. The groom’s refusal to take down the video is a stand for validation. Readers, how can families confront favoritism without deepening divides?

The groom’s choice to keep the video up asserts his worth. Moving forward, he might consider a mediated family talk to address past hurts, but only if his parents show accountability. Until then, the video stands as a testament to his resilience.

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See what others had to share with OP:

Here are some hot takes from the Reddit community—candid and humorous. Redditors didn’t hold back, dishing out support and shade in equal measure:

[Reddit User] − **NTA. The truth hurts sometimes and your parents & sister just got whammied! Your friend is AWESOME. Please leave the video up!**. \*Edit\* Thanks so much for the awards!

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Pinetree218 − NTA They were finally called out on their blatant favoritism and they obviously didn't take it well. I'd hold off inviting them anywhere or to anything, OP. At least for a while. Don't make them your first priority when you clearly aren't theirs. Focus on your new wife and your absolutely awesome best friend. They both sound like keepers!

[Reddit User] − NTA I think I'm in love with the best man. He absolutely showed your parent's favouritism/hypocrisy? in the best way ever. I hope there will never be an invite to a baby shower etc.

NotTwitchy − So, typically, when someone asks you to take down a video of them because it’s embarrassing, you do it because it’s polite. But in this case? Hard NTA. They didn’t have a good reason to miss it, and they’re rightfully mortified. They made the bed, they can lie in it.

big_bob_c − NTA. It was

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Sel-Reddit − NTA. Every single person at your wedding saw that they didn’t show up. So, what exactly are they hoping to hide by taking it down? If they felt justified not coming, stand by that decision, defend it. If you can’t, then you KNOW you did something wrong. They deserve it. They can’t make up missing your wedding for no good reason.. ETA: thanks for my silver! How kind of you. 😊

vixlyn − Your wife and best friend are the true heroes.

Aggravating-Deer1445 − NTA but do yourself a favour and cut them out of your life. If you are not important to them, dont let them be importsnt to you.. I did this with my father and i am better off now

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wehav2 − NTA - They weren’t bothered about missing your wedding. They were bothered they got exposed. If exposing their behavior bothered them, they knew what they did was awful.

keiko1984 − NTA My parents missed my wedding too all because my sister didn’t want to come because my husband is from Italy & we had it in his hometown & she didn’t like the weather forecast.Lol.No joke.. Even despite their tickets & accommodation being paid for.

(Story of my life. Missed events due to her issues/needs & I can’t/don’t even blame my sister because she’s so enabled by my parents enabling & doesn’t know better lol). Didn’t know until the night before needing to pick them up at airport.. I cried and then laughed and then got married without them..

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Never spoke to anyone ever again and been NC for almost 15 years.. You get to a point where you realize that what you allow will continue.. Don’t ever take that video down. Let them be reminded every year it comes up that they are to blame and their mistakes are the reason you cut them off.

These are popular opinions on Reddit, but do they really reflect reality?

This story lays bare the sting of favoritism and the power of taking a stand. The groom’s refusal to remove the video isn’t just defiance—it’s a demand for respect from a family that’s sidelined him too long. His parents’ vague promises to “make it up” can’t undo missing his wedding. Have you ever had to call out family for favoring one sibling over another? Share your stories below. What would you do if your big day was skipped for a flimsy excuse?

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3 Comments

  1. I think mine maybe caps them all. My mother missed my first wedding (biggest mistake I ever made) because it was her BINGO night. Wouldn’t allow my sisters to come, stepfather would have nothing to do with me in any case, and talked my grandparents out of coming. Mom didn’t live long enough to see me married to my husband 51 years ago.

  2. Just because someone is family doesn’t mean you have to put up with their bad behaviour. If a friend treated you badly you would cut ties, family is no different. I have several family members I no longer talk to you as I deserve better than their bad treatment.

  3. My folks got an acrimonious divorce when I was 17. Neither of them were perfect. My brother and sister had zero empathy for him, and cut him loose to die. I was pissed at him for a while until I realized my mom had made mistakes as well and maybe my view of him had been colored by her. My dad took early retirement on a medical issue and moved away from everyone he ever knew to live on the side of a mountain in a lumber town four hours away. I would visit as often as I could afford (not very) and whenever I visited, my father would ask about my brother every single time, sometimes before he’d even ask about me, despite the fact that my brother openly despised him. Never asked about my sister though, because she once told him he had to be sober if he wanted to visit his grandchildren.

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