AITA for not saying where I got my clothes from?

A casual compliment about an outfit turned into an unexpected debate about fashion and friendship. A 20-year-old student who enjoys dressing up and curating her own style found herself criticized by her friends after refusing to reveal where she bought one of her clothing pieces. During a meetup before a lecture, a friend admired her pink top and asked where it came from.

Instead of sharing the store, she explained that she preferred to keep her style unique and offered to help the friend find something similar elsewhere. The response didn’t go over well. What seemed like a small choice quickly spiraled into group messages accusing her of “gatekeeping.” The situation sparked an online discussion about whether keeping fashion sources private is reasonable or unnecessarily competitive.

‘AITA for not saying where I got my clothes from?’

The student enjoyed fashion and often received compliments from friends.

I (20F) really love to dress up, look nice, and put together, all that stuff. I also have a petite body frame and do cardio frequently so I am very...

Earlier this week, I was going to lecture to meet up with friends and they complimented my outfit. We were sitting down and Tracy (19F) said “Your outfit is so...

A simple question about a pink top started the disagreement.

Where did you get the pink top from?” Normally if it was makeup or something I would say where I got it but the thing is, I want my style...

I declined telling her and told her I could help her find something similar at a different store. Tracy looked at me with a stink eye and turned to another...

The conflict continued after she returned home.

When I got home, my phone was blowing up from my friend group telling me I was a b__ch for “gate keeping” my clothes and that I should’ve just told...

However, I have some friends who sided with me and said I have the right to want to be unique and have my own style. AITA?

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Disagreements about fashion recommendations may seem trivial, yet they often reflect deeper social expectations within friend groups. In many social circles, sharing where to find a good outfit is seen as a friendly gesture. When someone declines, it can sometimes be interpreted as exclusivity or competitiveness rather than a personal preference.

From the poster’s perspective, maintaining a distinctive style felt important. Fashion can be a form of self-expression, and some individuals take pride in curating a look that feels uniquely theirs. Wanting to avoid identical outfits within a close group of friends may stem from a desire to stand out or maintain individuality.

At the same time, the strong reaction from the friend group suggests that the refusal may have come across as dismissive or overly protective. Many people view style as something collaborative—sharing inspiration, brands, and stores with friends rather than guarding them. The clash illustrates how personal values around individuality can collide with social norms about openness and camaraderie.

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Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Many commenters criticized the decision and felt it came across as arrogant.

[Reddit User] − YTA, you do come off as being pretty arrogant and unfriendly. You should have just told her, it won't k__l you if someone else wears a similar...

theOGsmuggla − YTA I would be pretty taken aback if someone responded like this to me asking the same question.

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Sounded like Tracy was complimenting you and interested where you got your clothes, not getting in the car racing to the store to get the same exact top. Does sound...

Flownique − YTA. I fail to see how sharing where you got a shirt would compromise the uniqueness of your style.

A shirt can be styled a million different ways and you yourself admit that clothes look a certain way on you because of your specific figure. Just because someone buys...

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fruskydekke − YTA, and honestly, you seem a bit full of yourself.

Pharmacienne123 − YTA. That’s so petty and self-absorbed. She was honestly probably only asking to be polite.

And if you would “help her find something similar” then your style isn’t going to be very unique anyway is it? This post just reeks of arrogance.

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Some commenters took a more balanced approach to the disagreement.

Wallflowerheart − ESH. This is stupid. Instead of telling her you didn't want to tell her you could have simply said you didn't remember.

The likelihood of her going and buying the exact same top is small. It's also stupid they're upset about it. It's not a big deal.

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Exxtender − YTA for gatekeeping your "unique style". 🙄

Others responded with blunt or humorous reactions to the situation.

Sashimi1300 − YTA. Get over yourself lmao

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FoodBabyBaby − YTA - you’re not unique nor do you have your own style. If you did, it would not matter what anyone wore you would style it in your...

subversivesocialite − YTA. Women can be collaborative or competitive. The latter ultimately doesn’t have a lot of friends. Who cares if you’re twinning? They have great taste, too! You sound...

What started as a casual compliment about a pink top quickly evolved into a larger debate about sharing, individuality, and friendship expectations. While the student valued keeping her style unique, many people felt that refusing to share a store name turned a friendly interaction into unnecessary tension.

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So what do you think? Should people feel free to keep fashion sources private if they want to stand out, or is sharing recommendations simply part of being a supportive friend group? How would you react if someone refused to tell you where they bought an outfit you admired?

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