AITA for not returning my neighbours kids balls and toys?

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A sunny backyard, a snoozing puppy, and then—whack! A football crashes in, turning a peaceful moment into chaos for one homeowner. Their six-month-old pup now trembles at every outdoor noise, thanks to a neighbor’s child lobbing balls and toys over the fence.

After a polite plea to the neighbor went ignored, the homeowner started keeping the stray items. Shared on Reddit, this tale of backyard woes stirs up debates about pet safety and neighborly respect. With a playing field nearby, why does this kid keep targeting the garden? Let’s explore.

‘AITA for not returning my neighbours kids balls and toys?’

So I’m at my whits end with my neighbours kid - he’s about 7ish and is constantly kicking his ball over the fence or throwing things like toy cars or water pistols. I have a 6 month puppy who was happily sunbathing in the garden one day when a ball came over the fence and hit her and now she is scared every time she goes in the garden or hears them.

I went next door and explained to his dad that it isn’t fair that my dog can no longer relax in her own garden and can they stop kicking the ball against the fence. For info my garden backs onto a large playing field with goal posts and basketball courts where lots of kids play. We’ll nothing has changed and it has been a couple of weeks now. I have just come home to find another 4 footballs in the garden…. I’m not returning them…..AITA?

Neighbor disputes over stray toys can feel like a sitcom, but they hit hard when a pet’s involved. The homeowner’s puppy is scared, and their polite request was ignored, leaving them to play ball-keeper.

Dr. Stanley Coren, a canine behavior expert, says, “Sudden noises or objects can create lasting fear in puppies, especially during their socialization period.” The pup’s distress is real, and the neighbor’s inaction—despite a nearby playing field—shows a lack of courtesy. The homeowner’s toy retention is a natural consequence but could spark tension.

This taps into a bigger issue: neighborly boundaries. A 2021 survey found 27% of Americans face property disputes, often due to poor communication. The father might not see the harm, while the homeowner prioritizes their pet. Solutions? Suggest a higher fence or a supervised playtime.

See what others had to share with OP:

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Reddit users brought humor and heat to this backyard saga. Here’s what they said:

HegoDamask_1 − NTA. You warned them and there’s consequences. Just continue to collect the balls until you have enough to open a sports league or donate them to a charity organization.

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Fantastic-Focus-7056 − NTA. It's not abnormal for children's footballs to be accidentally kicked into a neighbors garden, but if it happens this regularly and it scares your dog, I believe your request was very reasonable! The fact there are also toy cars in your garden,

make it seem more as if the kid is throwing stuff on purpose. Does he know you own a dog? Maybe it's his way of wanting to play with the dog? Maybe try to explain directly to the kid that he is scaring your dog or that he might ger hurt from being hit or potentially eating one of the toys.

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Wasdcursor − Hey neighbour, thanks for sending over some balls as chew toys for the dog! Too bad they're now unusable and I'll throw out further ones after Pooch is done with them. Also I'll invoice you for any vet bills to get my dog checked out if any dangerous items come over eg. breakable plastic.

Also if you keep using the fence as a wall to kick against then I'll preemptively contact council because it'd be a shame if my dog is tormented by noise and ends up reactively barking, which is an avoidable nuisance for all of us.. Thanks!

mrs_spanner − NTA; you and your dog should be able to sit in your garden without a constant stream of things coming over the fence. You’ve asked politely and nothing’s changed, so you’re within your rights to keep hold of the stuff. Whose fence is it, out of interest? Yours/Theirs/shared ownership? If yours, you could consider adding trellis panels to the top.

[Reddit User] − NTA. I'd even pop them and say they hit some thorns. They'll definitely think twice about that.

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ClothesQueasy2828 − NTA. You tried talking. It didn't work. It's time to try something else. Good luck.

claireisabell − NTA, I coordinate a preschool program and we implement this strategy for kids who throw/kick ball over the fence and out of our play yard, it's a fantastic consequences- it's a natural consequence, it's immediate, and it's relevant. None of my teachers can leave to go get the balls because we would be out of ratio.

Even the 2 year olds learn pretty quickly where to and where not to throw/kick their balls. If a ball goes into the baby yard they're unlikely to get that ball back in less than week, the infant teachers really don't like when balls going flying into their play yard and the wall between the yards is pretty high it's hard to accidentally kick a ball over there.

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They learn to be mindful very quickly, we do go get the balls usually during nap time or at the end of the day but certainly not immediately. I would consider returning them if the kid comes to your house to apologize and ask for them back, but I wouldn't just toss them over the fence, I'd also make the kid collect them out of the yard, I'm not doing that work for him.

debdnow − NTA because you spoke with the father and there is a play area for the child to go play ball. I first thought 'Children kick balls over fences. Relax' but then you wrote the child throws toys over too? That's done one purpose, not accident.

If pressed by the father, tell him and the child you'll give the balls back this last time but from now on what comes over the fence is yours to do with what you want. Hopefully your dog can get some enjoyment out of the balls.

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NotThisAgain21 − An old friend had a neighbor who would put the balls on display in his basement window for the kids to see. He wouldn't give them back. Personally, in this situation, I would use my staple remover to puncture a bunch of puppy-tooth sized holes in the balls and lob them back over the fence.

plainfully_oblivious − NTA I would collect everything that flies over then quietly drop them off at the playing field.

From cheeky quips to practical tips, these comments show how neighbor disputes stir emotions. But do they solve the problem or just add fuel?

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This tale of flying footballs and a frightened pup underscores the delicate dance of neighborly coexistence. The homeowner’s stand to protect their pet is understandable, yet it risks fueling a feud. With a bit of creativity and communication, both sides could find harmony—perhaps a shared playdate or a sturdy trellis. What would you do if you were in this homeowner’s shoes? Share your thoughts and experiences below—let’s keep the conversation rolling!

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