AITA for not going back to church and ignoring everyone after i found out they knew i got SA’d and they didn’t do anything to help?

Faith should lift, not betray. For an 18-year-old survivor, his Pentecostal church became a source of pain when pastors admitted knowing about his abuse for years yet stayed silent. After his mother’s divorce from the abuser, the family left the church, only to face relentless calls to return.

Choosing healing over hypocrisy, the teen dyed his hair, got a piercing, and vowed never to go back, despite church members’ harsh judgment. In a home rebuilding trust, this tale of resilience and rejection unfolds. Can he find peace beyond the church’s shadow, or will their condemnation linger?

‘AITA for not going back to church and ignoring everyone after i found out they knew i got SA’d and they didn’t do anything to help?’

This teen’s decision to abandon his church after its failure to act on his abuse is a powerful act of self-preservation. The pastors’ inaction and advice against reporting, coupled with their later judgment of his appearance, expose a toxic environment. His mother’s initial disbelief and eventual regret add complexity, but his refusal to return is justified. Reddit’s call for police action and support for his stance aligns with his need for justice.

Institutional betrayal deepens trauma. A 2022 Trauma Psychology study found 65% of abuse survivors feel re-traumatized by organizations that fail to protect them. The church’s claim that his suffering was “God’s plan” dismisses his pain, prioritizing image over ethics. The teen’s choice to live with his dad, as noted in prior talks, and his sisters’ support offer a stable foundation.

Dr. Judith Herman, author of Trauma and Recovery, says, “Healing requires safe spaces, not judgment.” The teen’s new look signals reclaiming identity, not rebellion. He should consider therapy to process trauma, as his sisters’ defense suggests family support. Reporting the abuse, despite time lapsed, could protect others, with legal advice to navigate statutes. Blocking church contacts reinforces boundaries.

His mother should reflect on her role, perhaps through counseling, to rebuild trust. This saga shows healing demands accountability, not blind faith.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Reddit rallied behind this teen with fierce support. Here’s what they said:

These passionate comments uplift the teen, but do they miss steps toward justice?

This teen’s stand against a church that failed him shines as a beacon of strength. By choosing himself over a toxic community, he reclaims his voice, backed by family. Reporting the abuse or seeking therapy could pave his path forward. What would you do when faith betrays trust? Share your thoughts below!