AITA for not giving my sister (single mom) money for a car when I can afford to do so?

Charlotte Morse Hours
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Picture a 17-year-old hunched over her sketchpad, turning doodles into dollars with a thriving online sticker shop. Her hard-earned savings are her ticket to university, a reward for countless hours of hustle. But when her older sister, a single mom with a taste for luxury, totals her car and demands a new one from the teen’s profits, the vibe shifts from creative to confrontational. Mocking the “juvenile” stickers she now wants to cash in on, the sister insists family duty trumps personal goals.

The teen’s sharp refusal, laced with a snarky jab, has her parents urging her to reconsider for the sake of her sister’s kids. This Reddit saga dives into a clash of sibling rivalry, financial boundaries, and the sting of entitlement. Is the teen selfish for guarding her earnings, or is her sister’s demand a step too far? Let’s peel back the layers.

‘AITA for not giving my sister (single mom) money for a car when I can afford to do so?’

I (17F) have an online shop that I've been running for about a a two years now. It sells mostly stickers with my custom art, as well as some other small items. I put a lot of work into it, basically if I'm not doing school stuff I'm working on stuff for my shop, I love it The pandemic has let me put even more time in

and over the past 10 months it's done REALLY well. I have a good chunk of money saved for University and other things. My sister (25F) is divorced with two kids (1M and 2F). She has a job and child support. We've never gotten along, she always acted like she was embarrassed by me.

She's said I'm an anti-social nerd loser which - fair lol. One of the things she always made fun of was my sticker hobby. She said stickers were juvenile and I'm just creating more garbage in the world. She totaled her car recently and can't afford a new one.

My parents told her to ask me for a loan (they can't afford to help her) and she sort of scoffed and asked them how much a loser like me could have, I don't even work. They told her how much I have in my bank account and she called me DEMANDING I buy her a new car.

Not asking, DEMANDING. She said I didn't need the money, that I could get student loans like she did, and that I was a bad sister for not offering to help her out / pay her when I knew how tough she had it. She eats out all the time, buys expensive clothes/shoes/bags, makeup palettes, trips to the spa and with her friends (pre-covid).

I had no idea she had it 'tough' but in fairness, even if I had, I probably wouldn't have given her money. At no point in this convo did she mention paying me back. She said that I've never contributed anything to the family (which is a joke coming from her) and that further to buying her a new car,

I should give her what I make from my 'dumb hobby' since as a single mom she needs the money much more than I do, as I live rent-free at home and don't contribute to bills or groceries. The thing is - she's not wrong. But I don't want to give her a cent.

She's my sister and I love her but I don't like her very much, she's selfish and entitled and it bugs me she just makes these demands like I'M the one being unreasonable. So I said hell no and that she probably is too good for my 'baby sticker' money anyway, I wouldn't want her to stoop to my level, then I hung up

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and stopped responding to her texts/calls/DMs. My parents won't force me to do anything, they say it's up to me but that I should reconsider. She's my sister and is having a hard time and there are two babies involved, they need a car. I don't strictly need the money right away like she does and I was pretty snarky with her. So Reddit, AITA?

Edit: I just want to say thank to everyone that responded, I didn't expect so much support and I'm truly touched. I was freaked out at all the comments coming in but you're all so nice!! I've been reading everything, sorry for not responding to everyone.

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I had a lot of conflicting emotions. I knew my sister was being a jerk but factors like her kids, quasi-recent divorce, and just the fact she can be really convincing had me questioning myself. I'm sorry if this post came off as validation seeking, I can see how it would.

I thought helping her might be the right thing to do since I would if she were nicer to me and I didn't want to be petty. But there were a lot of great comments that pointed out stuff I hadn't thought about or was just plain ignorant on and now I feel a lot better about not giving her money.. So thank you again!! And thank you for the sticker love too lol.

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A teen’s sticker empire shouldn’t be a piggy bank for her sister’s poor planning. The OP’s sister, despite her job and child support, lives lavishly—spa trips, designer bags—yet demands a car from a 17-year-old’s savings without mentioning repayment. Her mockery of the OP’s “juvenile” business, only to claim its profits, screams entitlement. The parents’ suggestion to help, while not forceful, overlooks the sister’s responsibility and the OP’s right to her earnings.

This scenario highlights a broader issue: financial boundaries in families. A 2022 study by the National Financial Educators Council found that 60% of young adults face family pressure to share personal earnings, often derailing their goals. The sister’s demand, paired with her dismissive attitude, risks exploiting the OP’s success.

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Financial planner Erin Lowry advises, “Your money is yours to prioritize, especially when you’re young and building your future”. The OP’s savings are for her education, not her sister’s lifestyle. The parents’ breach of privacy by sharing her savings amount further muddies the waters.

Advice: The OP should protect her savings, perhaps moving them to a separate account, and firmly restate her refusal to her sister. If she considers helping, a formal loan agreement with clear repayment terms, as suggested by LegalZoom, is a must.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Reddit brought the fire, cheering the OP’s stand with a side of shade for her sister’s gall. From slamming the parents’ boundary breach to urging the teen to guard her cash, the comments are a lively rally. Here’s what the community had to say.

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Servantofbosco - NTA. If she wanted money from you then she should at least *try* to be nice to you. Keep your sticker money for college. You are only seventeen-a minor. You don’t have to contribute to the family. It is the job of the family to support *you. *

FjohurslikeU - DO NOT GIVE HER ANY MONEY! She made her bed let her lay in it. You are 17 learn from her mistakes and save as much money as you possibly can!!! Also f**k your parents for telling their grown daughter to ask a 17yr old for money. Shame on all of them. Buy yourself a nice car.

Nobetterlogin_ - NTA, and protect that money however you can. I suspect parents will subvert you and take it when you stick to your guns.

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[Reddit User] - NTA absolutely NTA. How dare your parents tell her what you have in the bank. Who the hell does she think she is demanding you buy her a car?. Where does it stop if you give in?. Considering how she treats you, why would you even consider it? She has a job, she can take out a loan. If you decide to help her,

protect yourself, get proper papers done, a promissory note. Take care of your own needs, your work, your money. If it's desperate and you feel you should help, offer to help buy an old beater of a car. But make sure you are paid back over time or this will never end. I've seen this happen before, one sibling leeching off the other.

[Reddit User] - NTA. A 17 year old shouldn’t be expected to give money to their 25 year old sibling. Why can’t she use a bank for a car loan?

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CorinnaPac - Hi 🙋🏻‍♀️ In my opinion you shouldn’t feel guilty about her situation. Whatever situation she is in is her fault and not your own. You are only 17 not even an adult yet and you shouldn’t have to be pressured to help your “adult sibling”.

If she had asked nicely and you wanted to help then that would be another thing. But I feel that she’s entitled and feels that you should just help her automatically and if I was in your situation I wouldn’t honestly 🤷🏻‍♀️. She could have been nicer but she choose NOT to.

So why do you have to? If you are working hard on your sticker business and dedicating all your free time to it why should someone else benefit from that money if it is for college. You have NO reason to get into debt if you are working hard and saving YOUR money.

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You are the smart one and not the nerd loser. Please don’t ever feel like this. You are incredible and you are incredibly smart and versatile. You were able to make a profitable business from something you LOVE doing. That is phenomenal and everyone’s dream.

Like you said before - you didn’t even know she was having a hard time because she spends her money on so many unnecessary things. I wouldn’t give someone my hard earned money for them to just throw it away on unnecessary items.

It sounds like your sister doesn’t know how to manage her money and maybe if she would have done a better job or not spent it on spa days, make up and handbags then she would have money saved up for an emergency.

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Don’t feel bad honey and don’t give her your money. I have an older sibling just like this and she stoled my credit cards and ran them up and never paid them. Not because she is your sister means she won’t hurt you.

Keep your money for your studies and let her ask for a car loan like the rest of us.  And you shouldn’t have to pay rent or the bills at home - you are 17 and you are your parents responsibility- they had you they need to care for you until you are 18. Best of luck honey 😉

[Reddit User] - NTA. Save and invest your money. Separate your finances from your parents as soon as it is possible/legal. They overstepped a major boundary here. It would be unwise to loan money for a car to a person who can't qualify for a car loan from a bank... That's just business, and why business and family don't mix.

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[Reddit User] - The thing is - she's not wrong.. Yes, she is. She is f**king wrong. You are still building your life, until you have build your life, all that leftover money you have isn't leftover money and spending that money means that you will push back that moment that you have leftover money.

You don't have leftover money until you've finished your education, own your own house if you want too, have a stream of income, have emergency savings and have enough retirement build up. Until that moment, everything you spend, costs double.

An extra year of having to rentil until you can buy a place? 9.600 dollar. Student loans? Interest! What if you have to take a lower paying job with less opportunity for growth because you can't buy a car because you bought someone else a car???

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Until you are done with the big expenses to build your life: you do NOT have leftover money. You're still building. And sure, spend some money every now and then. Mental health and enjoyment out of life is also important. But you don't have 'gifting someone else a car'-money.

[Reddit User] - NTA, she insults you and your hobby and expects you to buy her s**t, I’d tell her to f**k off tbh

miamimely - NTA, she can sell some of her expensive bags and other stuff and get a car. If you give in you'll be giving her money all of your life.

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These Reddit takes are as bold as the OP’s stickers, but do they miss any family nuances? Is the sister desperate or just entitled?

The OP’s refusal to bankroll her sister’s car isn’t selfishness—it’s self-preservation. Her sister’s entitlement, built on years of mockery, doesn’t justify raiding a teen’s college fund. This story reminds us that hard work deserves respect, not demands. What would you do if a sibling tried to claim your earnings? Share your thoughts—have you ever had to shut down a family money grab?

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