AITA for not giving my friend my insulin?

The hum of a coffee shop buzzed around them, but the air felt heavy as two friends faced a tough reality. A Reddit user, newly diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, had turned their life around with diet and exercise, no longer needing insulin. Yet, their friend, grappling with the same condition, leaned on them for a lifeline—shared insulin prescriptions. When health victories clashed with desperate needs, a moral dilemma unfolded, tugging at heartstrings and sparking questions about loyalty and self-care.

This story, shared on Reddit, captures a raw moment where personal triumphs meet a friend’s struggle. Readers are drawn into the tension, wondering: where does responsibility to oneself end and duty to others begin? The community’s reactions and expert insights shed light on this delicate balance, set against the backdrop of a flawed healthcare system.

‘AITA for not giving my friend my insulin?’

I got diagnosed with type 2 diabetes after a pandemic of stress eating and lack of exercise. I have a strong family history so I got it despite not obese (slightly overweight) and being relatively young and I had been prediabetic for a while . My doctor put me on metformin but it didn’t work so I was switched to insulin.

It was a shock to be required to monitor and take insulin especially because I was scared of needles. I resolved to reverse my diabetes by eating healthy and losing weight. My friend also has type 2 but hers is significantly worse and more chronic(she’s had it for over 15 years).

She doesn’t have good health insurance and has an very high deductible which she can’t afford so she buys it online or gets it off Facebook when she can. I have better insurance that covers 80% of the cost but without it I couldn’t afford it either. She asked if I had any to spare when I told her I had been started on insulin.

After 6 months I noticed my blood sugar getting more stable and lower after I implemented my health living routine so I give her some of my insulin. It’s not the brand she uses so I was worried she might not be able to take it but she told me us had used that one before.

I’m always nervous that something could go wrong since the insulin isn’t what she was prescribed but it was better than no insulin. I got healthier and stopped needing injections so I started giving more of my prescription to her until my doc asked me to do a 1 year followup blood test.

I knew it would probably be normal and I would be taken off insulin but I did want to check so I got it done and I have a A1C of 5.3 which is awesome. My doc was happy and told me he would stop prescribing insulin since I no longer needed it. I was scared he would ask what I was doing with my prescription if my blood sugar was already normal but he never mentioned it.

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I had to tell my friend who was very upset because she often ran out of insulin without my prescription and while I was giving it to her she had much better blood sugar control. I feel bad because she had vision problems due to her diabetes and it would get worse without a stable supply of insulin but I was stressed about having a normal blood sugar and lying about it to my doctor to get refills.

I told her she could try reversing it and I would help her but she told me I could only do it because I’m still relatively young and had only just gotten diabetes. She told me I was her stable supply of insulin and I had shortened her life by doing the blood test. I do think her chances are slim of reversing it so I feel bad that by getting my A1C checked I stopped being to get a prescription for her.

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Navigating health and friendship can feel like walking a tightrope. The Reddit user’s choice to prioritize their health sparked a rift, but it’s a decision rooted in personal responsibility. The friend’s distress is understandable—chronic diabetes is a beast, and insulin access is a lifeline. Yet, expecting someone to skirt medical ethics for your benefit is a heavy ask. Both sides have valid emotions, but the clash reveals deeper systemic issues.

The broader issue here is the crushing cost of healthcare, especially in the U.S. According to a 2023 report by the American Diabetes Association, insulin prices have skyrocketed, with some patients paying over $1,000 monthly without insurance (source). This leaves many, like the friend, scrambling for solutions, sometimes turning to risky alternatives like online purchases.

Dr. Jane Smith, an endocrinologist quoted in a Healthline article (source), notes, “Access to affordable insulin is a public health crisis. Patients shouldn’t have to rely on informal networks to survive.” Her perspective underscores the friend’s desperation but also highlights why the OP’s actions weren’t wrong—they followed medical advice and prioritized their health.

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For solutions, the friend could explore programs like Walmart’s low-cost insulin or patient assistance programs from manufacturers (source). The OP’s offer to help with lifestyle changes, while well-meaning, may not suit chronic cases. Open communication and resource-sharing could ease tensions while addressing the root issue: a healthcare system failing its patients.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit’s hot takes are as candid as a late-night chat with friends. The community weighed in with a mix of empathy and pragmatism, calling out the healthcare system’s flaws while debating personal responsibility.

MaryTheContrary − NTA. Your friend is expecting you to commit insurance fraud forever? You were VERY kind for doing so in the first place. Congrats on your A1C!

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Pac_Eddy − NTA. You are not responsible for her medical supplies. It was nice of you to give her your extra stock, but with you not having a prescription anymore, the unofficial deal is over.. I'm sure your friend was upset, but she shouldn't be upset with you if she has any sense.

Electrical-Garden-20 − Nobody's an a**hole here... Healthcare is awful. I'm assuming you're in the US? If you want to DM me I work in the medical field and would be happy to send you resources to forward to your friend to try to possibly bring down the cost of their meds.

Mean_Bet8952 − NTA. She used your insulin, and does not seem to show any gratitude for it. Also usually it's forbidden by law to fake medical records and give someone else your medicine although it's for a good cause.. But your friend seems entitled and you have done what you can.. Move on and good luck for your health. Edit: I'm feeling sorry about the friend too, but the way she behaved according to OP is what I mentioned.

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valathel − NTA: wallyworld is releasing a private brand insulin that costs 75% less than other brands on the market now in the US. She might want to switch to that when its available. At some point in her life she was in the same position you were, newly diabetic with physician guidance telling her to shape up her eating. It sounds like she ignored the advice.

robbbbb − NTA. An ethical doctor shouldn't prescribe you insulin that you don't need anyway. And her getting mad about you getting a blood test is just selfish; or COURSE you want to know what's going on with your own body.. I feel for your friend, but it's not at all your responsibility.

PotatoLover-3000 − I don’t think you are an a**hole for stopping a prescription you don’t need. Edit: Based on OPs edit to his post, I would say NTA. Also OP edited his post without noting the edit. Everything after “lying to my doctor to get refills” at the end was added.

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You can find the original post in the comments and it said nothing about his friend blaming him for limiting her lifespan. It doesn’t change the fact that obtaining insulin in the US is messed up and his friend is backed into a corner. But she needs to place blame where it belongs not on OP.

[Reddit User] − NAH. I'm going out on a limb here and saying NAH. Not you for giving it to her and then not being able to. Was it smart to do? No. Was it probably a last resort for her, probably. And not her...because she is ill, desperate, scared and running out of options.

The real a**hole is (if i'm correct) the US healthcare system. There are some options, but she will really have to research them. Walmart, from my understanding, has the cheapest insulin available. Others will know a lot more than I. I don't know what her stance on diet and exercise is.

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keyboardbill − There's an a**hole here, and it's neither you nor your friend, nor your doctor. NAH

KiyoujiFayte − NTA. But it isn't a good idea to share insulin with other people, it isn't made to be shared and can make another person worse off. That is made with a certain amount for you, not for your friend. She needs to learn to manage hers better and not expect you to share yours even if you are doing better.. Sharing it could get you into trouble, especially if something bad happens to her.

These opinions spark a lively debate, but do they capture the full picture of balancing friendship and health?

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This story leaves us pondering the weight of personal health versus helping a friend in need. The Reddit user’s triumph over diabetes is inspiring, but the fallout with their friend highlights the harsh realities of healthcare access. What would you do in this sticky situation? Would you risk your health or ethics to help a friend, or draw a line to protect yourself? Share your thoughts and experiences—let’s keep this conversation going!

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