AITA for monitoring my son’s shower time and making him leave the door open
In a cozy apartment where one bathroom serves all, a dad clashed with his 16-year-old son over marathon showers stretching to 3.5 hours. Frustrated, the OP mandated an unlocked door and a 40-minute limit, sparking protests from his son and wife over privacy.
This Reddit tale dives into the steamy tension of family rules versus teen autonomy, where water waste and good intentions collide. Was the dad’s stance fair, or did it rinse away trust?
‘AITA for monitoring my son’s shower time and making him leave the door open’
Parenting a teen can feel like refereeing a game with no rulebook, especially when a shared bathroom becomes a battle zone. The OP’s son, hogging the shower for hours, tests both water bills and family patience. The dad’s unlocked-door rule targets waste but risks the teen’s need for privacy. Both have valid points: the OP seeks fairness, while the son, at 16, craves autonomy.
Psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour, author of Untangled, says, “Adolescents need privacy to develop independence, but boundaries must balance family needs.” The OP’s threat to enter could fray trust, especially for a teen navigating identity. Long showers might hint at stress or depression, common in 1 in 5 teens by age 18, per surveys.
This reflects a bigger issue: balancing rules with teen freedom. Non-invasive fixes like shower timers or cutting hot water could work better. Parents should also check in—long showers might mask struggles.
Take a look at the comments from fellow users:
Reddit’s crowd threw in everything from witty jabs to mental health tips, dissecting the OP’s shower saga with gusto. From guesses about the teen’s motives to calls for creative solutions, here’s the community’s splashy take:
![[Reddit User] − YTA for the privacy part.. Turn off the hot water. Or the water supply. He still gets privacy, you get results.](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/205248c-01.png)
![[Reddit User] − INFO, that is a long ass shower. whenever someone does something that bizarre, it is a good idea to do a mental health check in. he could be depressed, he could have some form of OCD that makes him need to shower compulsively and extensively. i mean this is just weird, especially since you said he has privacy in his room to do teenage boy activities.](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/205248c-07.png)
![[Reddit User] − NTA. No one need 3.5 hours of showering time. No one should waste that gargantuan amount of water. No one needs to block the F**KING BATHROOM for so long. This is about monitoring his showering time. Now on the disrespecting his privacy thing, I definitely thing it's not ok for anyone to force them to leave the door unlocked and whatnot.](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/205248c-10.png)
These Reddit quips are a lively mix, but do they hit the mark? Is the OP a practical parent or a privacy invader?
This shower-time clash shows parenting teens is a balancing act—firm rules need a splash of empathy. The OP’s frustration with his son’s epic showers is fair, but unlocking the door risks trust. Open talks and clever fixes like timers could save the day. What would you do if your teen hogged the bathroom for hours? Share your tips below!
