AITA for making my sister walk home from therapy?

In a cramped car weaving through city streets, a 24-year-old woman grips the wheel, her 20-year-old sister’s sharp words slicing through the air. Their weekly therapy rides, meant to heal old wounds of trauma and grief, have become a battleground, with the younger sister hurling insults and dismissing her sibling’s attempts to speak. Tired of being a doormat, the driver quietly resolves to draw a line, her heart heavy but determined.

At the therapist’s office, after enduring another tirade, she calmly declares her sister must find her own way home—a 40-minute walk in mild weather. The decision, backed by her therapist, sparks shock and fury, followed by chilling threats against her beloved cat. This Reddit tale unravels a raw clash of boundaries and family ties, where standing up for respect risks escalating a volatile sibling dynamic.

‘AITA for making my sister walk home from therapy?’

I'm 24F and younger sister is 20F.My younger sister and I both see separate therapists weekly. This is due to trauma, grief, family issues. Our appointments are at the same time so that I can drive us both, as I'm the only one with a car at the moment.

During the ride there she was berating me, being cruel, interrupting me if I tried to speak, screaming that she didn't care about what I was trying to tell her. She does this often, and not only with me but with my mom and our older sister as well.

She is in general, very rude and ungrateful, and never says thank you to any of us for the many times we have to pay for her things/food/give her rides. Once in the lobby of the therapists offices I said after sitting quietly and thinking for awhile, 'I'm not going to give you a ride home.

You can take a cab or walk.' She scoffed and said, 'yeah, ok.' Clearly not believing me. I discussed with my therapist the situation, we checked the weather and the distance, it would be a 40 min walk in a straight line back to our house, and it was not snowing, 40° F, and not too windy.

She would be fine. I decided to stand my ground. My therapist said that if this sounded like me being impulsive and unreasonable she would have tried to convince me not to do it but she agreed with me this was an alright thing to do.

When exiting therapy she was waiting for me and moved towards the door, I told her that I was not joking and she had to find her own way home. She still was laughing and not believing me. I unlocked my door to the car, got in, locked the car,

and slowly backed up and drove away while she slammed her hands on the windows and yanked on the door screaming 'what the f**k?!' And other expletives. I cried on the way home feeling guilty but at the same time so tired of being treated like a doormat.

I called my mom and explained everything through tears, she told me it was alright and to come spend the night at her house. I am currently at my mom's house. I called our older sister and explained as well, she said she is proud of me for standing up for myself and that younger sister cannot keep treating people the way she does and get away with it.

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Younger sister got home and got on wifi, and instantly took to Facebook Messenger in our family chatroom. The first thing she did was tell me to 'Watch out for (my cat), because who knows what could happen.' Then repeatedly tried to smear me to older sister and Mom who I think for the most part are on my side.

Younger sister then said she is deleting all my Minecraft world's, which I accepted as something she has done in the past when she is mad at me. I only hope that when I get home she hasn't destroyed any of my artwork (paintings and drawings). I feel sick to my stomach right now, I haven't msged her back and don't plan to tonight. Did I do the right thing?

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UPDATE: I had tons of people asking for an update, so I was given approval to update on this post. I went back to the house today, my cat is fine and I've brought her to my mom's. My Minecraft worlds are gone. It doesn't look like she went in my room. I'm avoiding her and still staying at my mom's. I cannot stay here permanently for many reasons.

To address a few questions I kept getting: yes we live together along with older sister. We haven't even lived in this apartment a month, we cannot renew the lease this early. We cannot afford to leave, or kick her out. I cannot 'beat her up' or anything and risk legal action against myself.

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If I find she has done damage to my property in the future I will not hesitate to take her to court. I do not have a lock on my door. I do not have money. Most of people's suggestions require money. I don't have $20.00 let alone a few hundred. I do not own a console or computer myself.

I've been trying to answer questions in the comments but a lot of it is hard for me to justify over and over. You don't know how abusive she is mentally and emotionally... And how this has gone on for years and broken me and my mother down. My older sister is on vacation for a week and isn't here to back me up this time.

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This sibling showdown exposes the toll of unchecked emotional abuse within a family. The 24-year-old’s decision to make her sister walk home was a bold stand against relentless verbal attacks, signaling she’s no longer willing to tolerate being belittled. Her sister’s escalating retaliation—threatening her cat and destroying her Minecraft worlds—reveals a pattern of manipulation and disregard for boundaries, complicating their shared living situation.

Emotional abuse among siblings is often overlooked but damaging. A 2021 study in the Journal of Family Violence found that 45% of young adults report experiencing sibling emotional abuse, which can erode self-esteem and strain family bonds. The younger sister’s behavior, while possibly rooted in her own trauma, doesn’t excuse her cruelty, and the older sister’s boundary-setting is a healthy step toward self-preservation.

Dr. Nedra Glover Tawwab, a boundaries expert, notes, “Enforcing consequences for toxic behavior is essential, even with family, to protect your mental health”. The older sister’s action, vetted with her therapist, was measured, but her sister’s vindictive response raises safety concerns, especially for her cat and belongings. Moving forward, documenting threats and securing valuables is critical.

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To address this, the older sister could maintain distance, limiting interactions like shared therapy rides, and explore legal options if property damage occurs. A family meeting with a mediator might clarify expectations, but if the younger sister’s behavior persists, alternative housing—despite financial hurdles—may be the only path to peace. Prioritizing her well-being while navigating this volatile dynamic is key.

Heres what people had to say to OP:

Reddit’s response overwhelmingly supports the older sister, seeing her refusal to drive as a justified consequence for her sister’s abusive behavior. Users condemn the younger sister’s cruelty, especially her threats against the cat and destruction of Minecraft worlds, calling her actions manipulative and entitled. They praise the older sister for standing firm, with many urging her to protect her pet and belongings, and some suggesting police involvement if threats escalate.

A few acknowledge the younger sister’s trauma but stress it doesn’t excuse her behavior at 20. The consensus highlights the need for stronger boundaries, with ideas like separate therapy schedules or a new living arrangement to reduce conflict. The community’s backing reinforces that respect is non-negotiable, even in family, and consequences are a wake-up call for change.

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PennroyalTea − NTA f**k her, I’d do the same thing. Sounds like she’s just causing you more agony while you’re over here giving her a ride to therapy (and going yourself?!) seriously wtf.

I get she’s going through s**t too, but she needs to understand that 1) she can’t treat people like that 2) she isn’t entitled to a ride and 3) her actions have consequences. Good for you for standing up to her.

[Reddit User] − NTA. A 40 minute walk is honestly not that long. I often walk or run for like an hour *for fun.* Her threatening your cat is a petty way of revenge and pure evil. Your cat is a living and breathing being.

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If I were you, I would distance myself as much as possible from the younger sister, and keep a super close eye on the cat. Can you just live on your own or with your mom? Anything sounds better than living with the sister.

Ciderxi − NTA- your sister sounds f**king insane. Never be mean to people who give you a ride, especially for free. She doesn't know how to treat people, so this is what she gets. She's 20 for fucks sake..

'Watch out for (my cat), because who knows what could happen.'. Tell her to quit her b**lshit Edit: Your sister is clearly abusive. She's not a g**damn kid. She needs to learn to behave. Not everyone in life will rollover and take her b**lshit by the mouthful.

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robinhood125 − NTA. You warned her, and she had time to apologize.

ILikeFuzzySocks − NTA. Your sister sounds crazy. Glad she’s in therapy. You *really* need to move: 1) for your—and your cat’s—safety and 2) for your sanity. You might not need to see a therapist as often once you are away from her.

RoseTyler38 − NTA. Your sister is a RAGING a**hole here. I am really proud of you for standing up for yourself here. The reactions of the others in your fam of origin suggest they think she's an a**hole too. It's hard to enforce boundaries but the more you do it the easier it gets.

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Consider telling your sis that she's on her own from now on and stop scheduling your therapy at the same time you know her session is so you reduce interactions with her. Let's talk about your housing situation and your cat. Does she live with you? Think about changing your housing setup.Is it an outside cat? Bring it inside for a while till you sort this mess out.

You do have the option of showing her written threats about your cat to the local authorities. (Honestly your sister is either not too bright, can't think through to the consequences of her actions, thinks she's got you so terrified of her that you'd not dare report her, or some combination of that. She made threats in WRITING. )

MakeAutomata − NTA. Did I do the right thing?. No you didn't do the right thing, you forgot to say this; 'I'm not driving someone around who is screaming in my ear. If you ever want a ride from me again I expect a written, sincere, apology.

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If I don't believe you mean it, you'll have to do it again.'. 'Watch out for (my cat), because who knows what could happen.'. 'I screen-shotted this message, if anything happens to the cat I will be reporting you to the police.'

ASBF2015 − NTA. I don’t know you, but I’m proud of you. I’m sure leaving her there was really difficult but I’m glad you stood your ground and stood up for yourself. Your younger sister sounds absolutely horrible. Her rotten attitude is going to rub someone the wrong way someday and it’s going to get her in trouble.

Throwing temper tantrums at 20 years old is ridiculous. She ain’t the Queen and I hope, for her sake, she’s able to get some self control. I hope you continue to not let her behavior slide and maybe she will start realizing she’s an adult and needs to act like one.

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If she does destroy your belongings, I’d even file a police report. I don’t normally recommend going to the cops over trying to civilly resolve issues, but she really needs a wake up call.

lordwoodsie − NTA - Your sister sounds like she's had this coming for a while. You warned her it would happen. You considered the consequences of following through, and determined it wasn't going to cause her any significant hardship. And on top of that, it sounds like the rest of your family is in agreement with you. She's 20 years old. Time for her to grow up.

Helppls445 − NTA she is an adult and you are doing her a favor by giving her a ride. If she was hurling abuse at you then you have every right to take away that favor

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This Reddit drama lays bare the pain of a sister’s cruelty clashing with a sibling’s resolve to reclaim respect. The older sister’s stand—making her abuser walk home—was a brave boundary, but the retaliation shows how deep the rift runs. Protecting her peace and pet may demand tougher steps. Have you ever had to enforce a boundary with a toxic family member? Share your story below—how would you navigate this sibling storm?

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