AITA for making my mom cry after she called my siblings and I accidents?
An 18-year-old girl faced heartbreak when her mother, after cheating and leaving the family, called her and her five siblings “accidents.” After six months of no contact, she confronted her mother, only to hear painful excuses that deepened her hurt. The conversation turned heated, leaving her mother in tears and her grandmother accusing her of ingratitude.
Was she wrong for expressing her pain and anger? Shared on social media, this story sparked a heated debate about loyalty, responsibility, and family wounds. Let’s dive into the details and see what the online community thinks.
‘AITA for making my mom cry after she called my siblings and I accidents?’
The 18-year-old shared how her family fell apart after her parents’ separation:
The six months of no contact were deeply painful:
When asked why she didn’t contact her children, her response was shocking:
She highlighted her mother’s absence as a parent:
This story exposes the profound pain of a mother not only abandoning her children but also calling them “accidents,” shirking her parental responsibility. At 18, OP showed courage by confronting her mother for answers, but her mother’s claim that having children “ruined” her life was a devastating blow.
Psychologist Dr. Gabor Maté writes, “Words that negate a child’s worth from a parent can leave deeper scars than their absence” (When the Body Says No). The mother’s description of her six children as “accidents” and her justification for abandonment as “finding herself” reflect a lack of accountability and empathy. This behavior, coupled with infidelity and six months of no contact, can cause lasting trauma, especially for the younger siblings.
On the other hand, OP’s mother may genuinely feel trapped by becoming a mother at 17, but blaming her children is unfair. Instead of owning her choices, she deflected responsibility, hurting OP and her siblings. The grandmother’s defense of the mother, while dismissing OP’s pain, further isolates her.
OP should continue therapy to process her hurt and anger. She should set clear boundaries with her mother, possibly reducing contact if her mother remains unapologetic. With the grandmother, OP could say, “Grandma, I’m hurt by what Mom said and did. I don’t want to argue, but I need respect.” She should also seek support from her father or other trusted figures to protect her mental health.
Long-term, OP needs to focus on building her own life and supporting her younger siblings, especially the 13- and 14-year-olds, through therapy or healthy family activities. This story underscores that honesty and accountability are the foundation of family bonds, and children should never be blamed for their parents’ choices.
See what others had to share with OP:
The online community rallied behind OP, condemning her mother’s irresponsibility and her grandmother’s reaction.
Many affirmed OP’s right to express her feelings:
![[Reddit User] − You’re right you just don’t accidentally have 6 kids if the first ones were accidents. First and 2nd kid maybe but after 3 then nah they’re not...](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/wp-editor-1759132256845-3.webp)
Some shared personal experiences and empathized:
Others criticized the grandmother and urged OP to set boundaries:
Some highlighted the lasting impact and offered advice:
This story exposes the deep pain of a mother abandoning her children and calling them “accidents,” causing lasting hurt. OP was justified in expressing her anger and pain, and her mother’s tears are a natural consequence of her irresponsible actions. Moving forward, OP needs to protect her mental health and support her siblings. What do you think? Should OP cut contact with her mother and grandmother, or seek reconciliation? Share your thoughts below!
